Ugh! Feeling heart broken.

[Lexieloodles]

I guess I'm just looking for sympathy. I'm 50 and am so fed up. I was asked to take on different duties at work, because the woman who usually does it had a family emergency. I love the job I usually do, and am really good at it. I didn't want to take it on, but was basically told that they really needed me to do this. This new position required me to be an assistant to another lady (who is pretty chaotic herself) and the whole thing went bottoms up! After 6 weeks in the other position, I'm back at my old job, but am feeling so depressed and like a total failure over the whole thing. I'm very embarrassed and feel like I have lost a lot of respect among my co-workers.

I think my ADD, which is not being treated right now, limits my ability to avoid pitfalls. I simply don't see them before its to late. Also, I think I must be a people pleaser because I really should have spoken up about some of the stuff I saw going on. I didn't confront my lead, and I didn't let my supervisor know.

Going to my family doctor next week to try to get some referrals/ medication... I'm not sure. I'm guessing medication/ doctor's visits, etc. are going to be somewhat expensive.

So tired of crashing and burning!

[Sandyvds]

Lexi stop worrying about what other people think that's a big problem right there who cares everybody has their own problems you'll be the topic for the moment and you'll be forgotten and on to the next thing stop worrying about that. Second be happy that you go to work everyday and you got as far as you did it sounds to me like you're overthinking and being so hard on yourself + for your own sake stop thinking about yesterday only think about tomorrow. You got this far in life stop beating yourself up be proud hold your head up high stay strong and you're going to be fine.

[Lexieloodles in reply to Sandyvds]

Thank you! Your post was a great start to my day!!

[stephenwbrandt]

I'm with you in understanding your situation; I'm looking for sympathy all the time but I've learned it doesn't work with most people and friends- Only alienates them

[Lexieloodles]

Yes, I think you're right! I'll stop whining and get on with it! 😁

[remimarcelle]

Don’t stop yourself from whining if you feel like it. Sometimes we all have crappy days. But you’re stronger than you think, honestly. Maybe you didn’t do as well as you’d hoped, does it make you a bad person? No!! Definitely not. You know, at least if you wanted to, you can take it as a learning experience. But you have worth! Keep your head up, smile and be proud of yourself. I bet there’s a lot you’ve done to be proud so think of that. Plus, every day is a new day. Just enjoy and be. We’re alive!! How amazing is that?

[Lexieloodles in reply to remimarcelle]

Thank you remimarcelle! Such kind sentiments made my day!!

[Sandyvds]

Hi Lexi happy Friday. I hope your feeling better. Remember life is short all the small stuff means nothing it's huge in our minds not in reality and keep in mind we feel things magnified with this i'm 54 years old so this is not new to me either this ADHD mind. I've been looking at the humorous side of this when I think of some of the things I've done try it some of its is like a sitcom. Lighten up stop thinking so serious and heavy it works try it. Ok have a great day...

[Lexieloodles in reply to Sandyvds]

Thanks Sandyvds! Such a positive spin on the life experience of someone with a adhd! I'll try to get over my mortification and see the funny side--- I'm sure there are 1or2 things worth a giggle 😉

[Kellypeters]

Be proud of yourself! You do your job well and work harder to do it that others without ADHD! Everyone struggles when they are asked to work outside of their strength areas. It’s also harder for you to cope with the feeling of failure as your drain will spin on it and you find it hard to stop thinking about it. Your emotions about it will also be harder to regulate. Having a whinge here was a good idea! And we can all encourage you and remind you of how amazing you are at your job! Medication has helped me a lot. You can always stop taking it if you don’t think it is worth it but it has made my life a whole lot easier and I now spend less time thinking about what a looser I think I am.

[Lexieloodles in reply to Kellypeters]

Thank you for this Kelly Peters! Your post really brightened my day! I am gearing up to see if medication is an option for me. Looking so forward to the day when I can feel a little more normal/in control/less affected by the adhd demons!

[Lexieloodles]

Wow! Thanks everyone! I feel so blessed for the support and kind words. Taking a deep breath and moving on!