Should I self-declare ADHD before an assessment

[daverussell]

Sorry for lengthy post... bear with me...

I work in a FE college and I work across 3 sites. I'm awaiting an ADHD assessment, yet I'm cynical about whether I have ADHD. I'm a teacher and had a meeting with my boss to discuss that I'm struggling with the workload - he's a great guy and I can be very open. So, if I think carefully about my traits, on the one hand I can convince myself I am ADHD, bit other times I just feel I accept it as "normal."

As I work across multiple sites, I have to hotdesk. In one of the offices that I'm in twice a week, it is very busy and I get little done. E.g. general coming and going and conversations around me, even though I wear noise-cancelling headphone and listen to relaxation music, it difficult to concentrate.

I told my boss a month or so ago, that I'm awaiting assessment for ADHD along side being sensitive to noise. I'm lucky I can be open and even told him I'm cynical. He has arranged for me to use a meeting room to avoid distraction.

Although I'm cynical and don't want to pull undiagnosed/self-assess as an ADHD victim, I'm now worried that I can't keep up with marking etc. - things I've prioritised for me, but it has put off tasks, e.g. checking on students. So may be I should self- declare ADHD. Can I do this whilst awaiting assesment?

I've started giving more thought to my traits.

In fact, it's been a standing joke with my wife and partner of 10 yes, that I a fidget e.g. watching TV or anywhere. I'm generally aware of that I'm always up and down.

As a teacher I don't sit or stand still - this is a good trait as it keeps students on their toes and I get my daily steps In fact I quit an office based job/career in my early 40s as it's a varied and can be an active job.

One reason I'm cynical is that I'm dedicated to my job and passionate about doing the best for my students. I can hyperfocus, that I recently learnt, can be part of ADHD. I'm also very organised and try to target set tasks using an organised/to do list; I learnt recently though that maybe this is learnt strategy.

The more I think about it though, I've struggled for a long time and go off on tangent - as opposed to not wanting to work (be lazy), but rather find more interesting tasks. I might not be able to finish project tasks, because I find something to fix or improve (it's like I'm on a mission to find it or can't let it lie). Is this a distraction by definition of ADHD?

My wife and partner of 10 years randomly ask me today, "do you like me holding your hand?". I said, "of course."

She says it does feel like Im actively pulling away but I don't keep my hand still and almost like I'm waiting for an opportunity.

Is this ADHD or am I overthinking?

[Old_Owl]

First, congratulations on taking steps to talk to your boss. And it sounds like he's already understanding and trying to accommodate you. Good place to be.I'm not sure why you would "self-declare." Does it give you added workplace protection or assistance?

Back in November, I was waiting on my assessment and got a new boss. Like you, ADHD seemed to make sense. I wondered if I should let my boss know or not. I've been in management in my company for a while and any protection and or assistance don't kick in until after an official diagnosis. But I needed him to know I had been struggling in a few areas, mainly focus and distractions, and I needed his help- basically a weekly one on one to go over status and progress over products I managed. That's what I needed then and its still helping with accountability.

I haven't told him about my diagnosis -yet. I don't need any other accommodations, I work from home so I control my environment. If that changes, I'll let him know. Again, I talked more about my symptoms than ADHD. And I really had no idea of the scope of it until after my diagnosis.

Having said all of this- in the end you need to trust yourself on this. And I think it's ok to know why you'd like to self-declare. And again, you've sound like you've got a great relationship with you boss, so either way will likely work. Again, what's best for you? 😊

[daverussell in reply to Old_Owl]

Thank you for the reply and sharing your story. As you say, I don't know the scope of it. One minute it adds up the next it doesn't add up.

[Old_Owl in reply to daverussell]

Maybe my favourite sentence- "One minute it adds up the next it doesn't add up." This could be a motto for a good deal of my life. 😂

As I said, trust yourself. It will work out. And you're not alone, the situation, and the going back and forth in you head is something I strongly relate to.

[Maghdalena in reply to Old_Owl]

Oh, yeah, I'm there with "One minute it adds up the next it doesn't". For me some days are better than others, and some minutes are better than others. It's so inconsistent seems to be consistent with ADHD.

For me, I don't self-diagnose, self-declare, I say I may have ADHD because of my symptoms which I've had ever since I can remember. I was even prescribed Ritalin in '64-ish because I was "active", though I fit in inattentive too, probably combination even though I'm waiting for assessment too. I just don't want to jump the gun and make assumptions. For the record, I was diagnosed with "Cretinism" or congenital hypothyroidism at 8 months. I was born without one, so I don't know if it's co-morbid or if it caused ADHD or not. Chicken and egg thing, I guess. I'm in my 60's now (63). Hope I'm not in too many places. I can be disorganized in my writing a lot, lol.

[Gettingittogether]

Why do you want your boss to know about this? Bosses are under no obligation to be "nice" to workers. Telling them we have ADHD doesn't necessarily change anything.

[daverussell in reply to Gettingittogether]

You're absolutely it doesn't necessarily change things, but they do have certain obligations and powers to help.My decision to let him know that I'm awaiting diagnosis was a difficult one. It's a stressful job and I Doctor Google can be a nightmare.

I contemplated it for a couple of months whether to tell him I'm awaiting an ADHD assessment. I was struggling at work and "something" is affecting my performance.

It could just be stress at work and I'll look completely stupid if I go to HR. I certainly don't want to share with other colleagues.

[Betsy74]

Hi Dave, given you have already told you boss you are waiting for an assessment it doesn’t feel like there is anything else to tell him at this stage (in relation to a diagnosis) self-diagnosing and relating that is unlikely to afford you any protection under the DDA, although it sound like you have been given good support so not sure why that would be a concern at this stage?

A couple of things to add people with adhd can and are of course dedicated to and passionate about their jobs, so that you are too doesn’t mean you are less likely to have adhd I’m afraid, and adhd ‘victims’ yikes….. yes adhd provides challenges but I’m not sure using the word victim is helpful.

B

[daverussell in reply to Betsy74]

Thank you. I use the word "victim" meaning, I don't want to sou d like I'm a victim.Meanwhile, as I await a diagnosis (either way) it isn't helping my current situation. I think I've already learnt some coping strategies - I rely on a task list and I think I rely routines (some comment on my rituals and "OCD"). I guess I'm worried about my job that I really like and without. I'd really like to know either way so I can take positive steps.

Thanks again for you response 👍🏼

[EJ_C]

Hi Dave

Looks like your UK based? So if so, when and if you are diagnosed, you will have the ability to apply for support through the access to work scheme.

Alongside this, it is a disability and you will be sorted due to this protection.

Working for a FE college, they'd be in a sticky position to discipline you etc. If you have disclosed to them your undergoing an assessment.

So I feel, you should tell them. Ensuring your HR department has this document too.

Maybe worth chatting with your union too as they'll have a team which specialise in this.

[daverussell in reply to EJ_C]

Thank you. I have a doctor's appointment next week. I will make enquiries about getting a referral letter, then speak to my union.

[daverussell]

Sorry for your loss, but I'm glad you got through.I guess I want an answer and give me a better chance. I've adopted some strategies either over time or having recent read about them. They are having a positive, but I guess it's easy to expect too much.

Thank you .

[DDsquirrel]

What you are describing sure sounds like ADHD to me! As others have said, I’m not sure what additional benefit you’d get from self-declaring the diagnosis while awaiting the official one. One thing you can do though, is to think of yourself as already having the diagnosis, and start doing things that would help someone with ADHD. It sounds like maybe you are already doing this somewhat. But if there are other things you CAN do before diagnosis, maybe give them a try. Some folks with ADHD find that caffeine helps them, and has a sort of an opposite effect than most people get from it, i.e. it calms them and helps them focus, rather than amping them up. Do you get that? Do you find that it changes with how much or when you ingest the caffeine if so? Otherwise, if there are accommodations like reducing distractions in your work environments, you may or may not be able to access those before the official diagnosis. You could always ask your boss/es, but I think it’s a toss up whether your boss/es would be helpful without the diagnosis.

I really feel you on the hot desk thing, though. I worked at an agency for a while that had me doing that. It was absolutely maddening, and working from home with the pandemic was WAAAAY better for me! Otherwise I was constantly dealing with interruptions and having to adjust to wherever there was space.

Good luck, and I hope that the assessment brings you the assistance you need!

[daverussell]

Hi ddsquirrell, thank you for the reply. I've started looking at different strategies. I think the hardest part early on is trying to remember :). A strategy that I've (probably) adopted over the years, to combat distractions, is being a bit of a perfectionist and certain routines such as cleaning and tidying.ive had comment at work and home say jokingly "you're OCD."

For this reason, I've dismiss ADHD. I think the problem I face, even though I'm only playing the ADHD card on myself is I don't feel like I can pretend. Also the more I read about ADHD, I'm surprised, yet on the other hand Its almost like ADHD is just normal. I think "isn't everyone like this. I'm just normal then. Get a grip".

[ADDandMe]

I typed a reply and lost it 😞 so this is the shorter version.

Have you tried completing a DIVA 2 assessment - just to see? (should be able to find with Google). Think you have to pay for the DIVA 5 which is the most up to date one. The threshold for diagnosis is to evidence 6 in a category (inattention/ hyperactivity or both) in more than one context.

Everyone’s ADHD profile is different. My executive dysfunction lies in organising my possessions. It’s chronic - it has always been. My Dad once brought me back a postcard from a work trip that said ‘it’s my mess and I love it’. I’m a dreamer and my thoughts don’t stay on one path. I forget what I’m doing and leave a trail of half completed tasks in my wake. I managed as a child because my mum lifted and laid me. As an adult I have developed strategies but the overwhelm still happens. I can hyperfocus on work, thoughts and ideas and be very intense with details (hence why this is not the short version I intended to write!! - I find it nigh impossible to summarise anything). So whilst theses seem at odds - lack of focus and hyperfocus- they are consistent in that my hyperactivity is in my brain!! It’s always ON.

I’m still early in my diagnosis and coming to terms with what this means for me. If you’re in the UK ADHDUK have a schedule of online sessions to talk about everything from diagnosis to nutrition to coaching. There are diagnosed and undiagnosed people who join. Recently someone asked if they should disclose their ADHD on applying if for a job - whilst in theory we should be able to, most felt that we’re not quite at that stage as a society to see the strengths of the ADHD mind and accept the deficits without being treated differently for it. However there’s probably more wiggle room for support once you’re in and have established those working relationships.

Personally I haven’t yet told my boss I was diagnosed. Just that I was looking into it (in the run up to diagnosis). I also don’t want others to feel I am using it as an excuse for special treatment. I want to own my ADHD, learn about what it means for me, focus on my strengths and find ways to minimise my deficits through strategies, adapting my life (decluttering, getting a cleaner, delegating etc) and maybe medicine.

Mel Robbins has a short video online where her neurologist shares her brain imaging and what happens on and off meds. He discusses how the brain doesn’t respond when concentrating off meds - the dopamine (the molecule of motivatation) actually goes down rather than up. Worth a watch.

Also - re your wife’s hand… yes this could be hyperactivity or maybe even a sensory issue. Could Autism factor in your profile? I’m not saying it does, but I just know ADHD often occurs alongside other things.

[daverussell in reply to ADDandMe]

And that was the short version 😂. I can be like this, when intending a short reply (wait for it). Seriously though, thank you very much for the reply. I've started looking at a DIVA 2 questionnaire.I've just come across a thing or two about traits on DIVA 2 that has triggered suspicions that I've dismissed... and where my journey to looking at ADHD stemmed from.

So! I've had hearing problem since a child. I worked in an open office and struggled with my hearing. I've asked about hearing aids from my mid-30s (or before) a few times, but they always said it was only mild hearing loss and I was too young to become dependent on them. Anyway, I left office work, as I found it frustrating and impacted my mental health. I bought a bike and started commuting on my bike. Which is what I just needed and would do upto 120 miles per week. About 9 years ago I moved jobs and cycling was not practical (35 mile commute). Even though I joined a gym I could only go weekends. I did back-to-back spinning classes. But inactivity mon-fri cause my mental health to deteriorate and frustration to escalate. I chose a career in teaching as if at least be semi-active but not waste my experience and knowledge. My hearing in the classroom was difficult, so now in my mid-40s, they finally gave me hearing aids.

However, hearing aids either, do not make a difference or made it worse (I've tried many configurations). So I've worn them on and off until I stopped altogether a few months ago. I had realised they seemed to make my hearing worse because I just pick up more background noise. An audiologist said it was recruitment (noise sensitivity). I've tried and tried to habituate, but the distraction had causes me too much frustration. Again, maybe I'm overthinking ADHD, but on reflection maybe my listening skills are just poor. Though when considering that I've alway fidgeted etc. it adds up as ADHD one minute and then it doesn't the next. Maybe it's just my hearing problems. Or, as you asked about Autism my twin sister was autistic. I just don't know that the problem. I'll give the questionnaire a go and look at other helpful in formation, especially the brain scanning.

[EJ_C in reply to daverussell]

Hey Dave, me again!Probably the most random advice... Take a look at the book or audiobook ADHD A-Z or find Leanne on Linkedin..

The way she talks about and explains strategies etc. Is really good. I've had ADHD for years but it was good to go oh yeah I do that.

So I guess if you say it alot... You've got ADHD.

And this is why im no longer a teacher.

[ADDandMe in reply to daverussell]

Interestingly, I’ve also had my hearing checked. Being a teacher too, I struggle with the noise and picking out what I’m trying to listen to. The audiologist found no issue with my hearing and put it down to a listening or processing issue. This was before ADHD was even on my radar.

[EJ_C in reply to ADDandMe]

So, my Ed Physc report for my Dyslexia (had to have it redone) when I went to uni (though it was years ago) and I just dug it out... So I had a similar challenge to you ADDandME.. So, it says I should seek advice for a Occupational Therapist to draw up a sensory profile..

Don't know what it means nor as you can tell I didn't follow it up. But might be worth googling.

Though I'm now distracted! What do you teach??!

[daverussell in reply to EJ_C]

I teach computing in an FE college.

[EJ_C in reply to daverussell]

I taught PE for a few years, until I told my Principal (in a number of words to FO) over her response to Dyslexia and ADHD and I should consider if im the right person to teach?.... Yup.... My PGCE observations were outstanding and so were those in my NQT year... But she didn't like my marking amongst other things. Ha.

Going back to your ADHD q) though. I honestly feel you should get your assessment. okay, it might not be ADHD (I dont know you) but if something is effecting your ability and you feel something is, then it has to be something. And there is support for whatever that is. That made zero sense.

[daverussell in reply to EJ_C]

Makes perfect sense. We are too quick put labels and thresholds on things to make sense of it - I can see from a medical perspective why this might be necessary. However, in society this doesn't particularly work with spectrum disorders. In fact, each and everyone of us doesn't fit neatly onto a spectrum; it's more of a scattering. Comorbidity is simply a broader scattering of traits that are as much a strength than a weakness, depending on its acceptance in society and culture.

[EJ_C in reply to daverussell]

And that is why society is still pretty bad. Even in schools. There isnt enough time devoted to things like ADHD and dyslexia etc. during training

Most teachers think ADHD is being hyperactive and naughty. Not its negatives nor it's positives.

It really irritates me... Reading your first message which started this chain. Society today, you shouldn't need a label to get some support or accommodation If you need it you should be supported. Especially when your a teacher or a lectuerer

[daverussell in reply to EJ_C]

We only really learnt that taking care of SEN and implementing strategies was a duty.. That was teacher training only 5 years agon. Yes, for ADHD it still seemed about labelling the naughty ones. I'm proud to say I entered education to make a difference to any unprivileged child. Finding my way into FE in a deprived area was the best moved I did. In fact, while working as a supply teacher after training I was miffed by my placement school., I did some support work at the college where I teach on contract. The support department rated me as one of there best support workers and now as a teacher. In fact, I spoke to my old boss only today, as noticed a student who had little information about him. When they investigated he hadn't been flagged due to late paperwork from his previous school. He had slipped through the net.

I've learnt so much over the last few week, so even if I'm not ADHD it may come of use in my job in helping out another disadvantaged person.

Happy days.

[ADDandMe in reply to EJ_C]

I’m a primary school teacher (7-11 year olds). For me it’s actually taking on board the information. I finding it almost impossible to recount a situation (which is really important when social and emotional issues arise in class 🤦🏻‍♀️). I cobble together an incoherent and fragmented report of what kind of happened. It’s embarrassing. Doesn’t matter how many times the children articulate what happened. I just can’t grasp the details.

[EJ_C in reply to ADDandMe]

Damn I feel you and totally feel you!

Doing Secondary, I had a number of mad dashes across school when I forgot my own timetable...

School reports were often copied and pasted (I know we all do it...)

The worse was I used to have to attend a few CAMHS meetings, I would mix up the students. Embarrassing.

[daverussell in reply to EJ_C]

I'm terrible with names and listening ironically. If a student discloses safeguarding issues, I absolutely have to write down everything/as much as possible (as is expected), but I struggle to piece together what was said, if I write notes later. Luckily I can touch type so I can write and listen, while maintaining eye contact.

Actually I do very well to listen as Im always concious of asking leading questions.

In education, questions and answers are paramount, but I struggle to hear (follow) what they are saying, so often have to just nod if I catch something that vaguely answers my question.

[daverussell in reply to daverussell]

I've just had a day of marking assignments. I've got the feedback mastered (or relatively efficient). Our assessment is assignment based, so I create a rubric linked to Microsoft Teams where students hand in. I just take An criteria and objectives from the awarding body and reword it to personalize it. I use that as a feedback bank and a starting point for general feedback. It's basically copy-and-paste but personalised it a little.The problem is having 3 system to update (Microsoft Teams, the central college database, then the separate paperwork to send to the awarding body - I have a spreadsheet and use ma merge (that in itself can be a distraction to fix or improve).

The further problem is doing it over and over again for late submissions, late starters, remembering which student have left the course, then retakes.

I naturally postpone it (I don't think I can blame ADHD), but then it mounts up and then my head explodes. However, if I do it as I go along I have to go though it all (even if I've done it) over and over again, just in case I missed something. There's always something however trivial and I then forget or run out of time to do (even the two or three) I originally sat down to do in the first place.

[daverussell in reply to ADDandMe]

I was referred to an audiologist when I was very young - 6 or 7, I think. I had problems hearing apparently. They fitted me with grommets. I have fleeting memories of being prodded and poked. I particularly remember being given gas for the operation to fit the grommets. It was scary. I don't.think I understood or realised there was a problem.