HELP!!!! Some of my close family memb... - CHADD's Adult ADH...

CHADD's Adult ADHD Support

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HELP!!!! Some of my close family members are not supporting my choice to use Adderall for my ADHD....

KikiFaye profile image
16 Replies

Hello! I am 36 years old and was recently diagnosed with ADHD and suffered for many years because of being undiagnosed. I have gone trough the testing , I am working with my therapist weekly on strategies and I started 15 mg of Adderall as well. The medication has been a huge help and I feel like a normal person. I am very close with my family and my sister which I love and respect very much sent me this article posted here in a screen shot. I have not responded to her because I don't really know what to say. Have any of you dealt with this negativity in your close circle or family?

I am not sure what to say or how to respond. I want her to understand that medication is a positive thing in my life and I am not abusing it or ever plan to do so. I do not have an addictive personality etc.

Thank you for sharing any thoughts or ideas.

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KikiFaye
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16 Replies
MeandmyADDU2 profile image
MeandmyADDU2

Hello, First, let your sister know that the Adderall and the strategies you are working on are and will make a huge difference in your life, for the best. People have a weird stigma about medication for mental health/neurological issues, which ADHD is. If you said you have to take something for cholesterol, high blood pressure or some other issue with your internal organs, she would probably not say a word.

Second point, I question the validity of that article, consider what is the source, who is the "Neuroscientist" and what study is this information based on? It's great that your sister is concerned about you, but Adderall has been around for quite a while and it's helping you and many others with the symptoms of ADHD.

Lastly, as you pointed out, you're 36, you're not a teenager or a college student who might use them to pull all-nighters to get reports or projects done.

I'm glad to hear that both the meds and the strategies are working for you. I'm 52 and have been struggling with ADD my whole life, as we all do, but it's only been the last 10 years or so, that I have realized how it effected me and those in my life. It's not just about being disorganized or always being late, it effects pretty much every aspect of your life, including your relationships, romantic, work and social. Sorry, I understand, it's frustrating, people don't understand what it's like and when you finally get help, they're not behind you and question what you're doing.

Best of luck, there are so many great resources out there now.

John

KikiFaye profile image
KikiFaye in reply toMeandmyADDU2

Thank you John!! I appreciate your kind words and you are right and all points. Blessings to you.

mattyr profile image
mattyr

Wow. Sorry Kiki that you are running into a challenges to your health goals. I am upset on your behalf. Sending someone a screen shot challenging their actions is passive-aggressive and looks manipulative to me. Please know I am not judging you or your family.

In my experience you can bring honesty. patience and kindness to the discussion and hope you get the same. It may not always work out but at least you tried with your heart.

Ways to defend you ideas and appeal to reason and love:

1. Is this screenshot SPAM? Who is awareness.com? Are they medical and mental health professionals? Hint: I looked them up and saw they are a PR firm.

2. You are working with board and state certified people who prescribe you medication. That is a closed loop with pharmacists following legal protocol.

3. Do your own research on the subject. Look for professional opinions but just layman experiences. Cite them and come back to anyone who doubts.

4. Ask them why they are trying to disrupt what you are doing? It is from caring or from a need to control you. With family it can be a mix. Try to ask them to see your perspective - you are taking charge of your life.

5. Share how you are feeling better and what it means to your self-esteem. This of course means you need to be vulnerable to them not being sensitive to that view.

6. You are an adult and you are making your choices from your conscience.

7. Meth and Adderall by prescription are not the same. Legality, quality standards and accountability are big differences. How may meth cooks care about your well being? How many drug dealers are monitoring your health and safety? These are no where near the same.

You are looking out for your best interests and seeking help and acting on that help is courageous. Good luck with your responses.

KikiFaye profile image
KikiFaye in reply tomattyr

Thank you so much for your response. You made some valid points and have given me a lot to think about.❤️

MissGC profile image
MissGC in reply tomattyr

Also, you can google the actual chemistry on methamphetamine vs amphetamine salts. They are no where near the same thing. Find a chemistry major college kid on an Internet forum, and they will break it down for your sister real quick like.

SallyMJJ profile image
SallyMJJ

Hello!

I identify with what you're saying. Like you, We both want to deal with our ADHD as best we can. We have had family members and friends try to do our job in managing our health. We may have let them do this when we were younger. But now we are full- grown adults!

I take Modafinil for my ADHD. It helps me focus. I am distracted less. I'm more successful completing tasks and organizing. For me, taking my medication is like wearing glasses - I can see more clearly, and don't trip as much.

I think you need to take the stance that the one who makes decisions about your health... is you. I learned a good technique for when people are trying to convince me to things that are not right for me. I say. "Thanks for your suggestion; I really appreciate it; I'll consider it." (And I then "consider" it all the way to the trash can in my mind!) That way, you don't have to argue about ideas that are not helpful to you, and it's much less stressful.

Do they recognize any of the areas of your life impacted by ADHD, how much you struggle? They must! It's usually pretty obvious. I find it helpful to give people I want to tell, a simple explanation with examples of how i deal with ADHD. I tell them ADHD makes my brain overstimulated, and that's why it's hard to focus. The medication, even though it's a stimulant, helps my brain slow down, so I can think the way most people do. Some examples for me – yours will be different:

1) I get scattered in conversations - I often try to say 3-4 things at the same time.

2) If i don't take my time, I will make mistakes much more often than the average person. Last year, i put a hair appt in my calendar for Jan 2018, instead of 2017. And didn't realize it, until after I missed my appointment.

3) Most of all, it is so hard for me to get and stay organized. That's why I signed up on this site, and want to find a support group. And why I take my medication.

Anyway, I hope that's helpful! Blessings to you!

KikiFaye profile image
KikiFaye in reply toSallyMJJ

I love what you said. Such great points. Thank you for taking the time to respond and I am going to consider using your suggestions.

Tiggerakafidgity profile image
Tiggerakafidgity

Hi there

Wow that's harsh man.

Pass her over to me and I'll give her some comfort in knowing that with the correct meds and behaviour therapy anything is possible.

I'm sure you are a lovely sweetie and very kind and will help anyone.

Now it's time to put ur self first and work very hard on ur self.

You can only become an ever greater person.

You actually already are it's just you need some help most probably believing it.

To any one on this board.

I have an infinite knowledge of adult ADHD and most of the meds that are available in the uk.

If any one wants to ask questions on there partners behalf I would be more than willing to help with positive feedback and tools that may lead on to an ever brighter future 😁😁😁

marxjenn profile image
marxjenn in reply toTiggerakafidgity

Hello fidgity, Thank you for your comments. Ilive in the US. Stimulant based ADHD meds make my heart beat very fast/ causes arythmmia. What non stimulant based drugs wouild your recommend looking into? I am looking for mild to no side effects, no weight gain. I am willing to try natural approaches as well.

Thank you

Tiggerakafidgity profile image
Tiggerakafidgity in reply tomarxjenn

Hi there

Well I've long q t syndrome.

I just have an ecg once a month and it's slowly now going down.

I've tried none stimulant drugs and felt awful on them,

I've been on Amazon and tried neurtrpics and they had no effect what so ever.

I even imported some from Canada with a promise that they will work straight away to no effect.

I've tried various stimulant meds and the one that I settled down on was good old fashioned Ritalin.

Try the short release tablets that way you could just take what you need for the day.

A 10mg tablets lasts around 4 hrs.

Is the physciatrist not letting you take the stimulant because of your heart rate ?

What I've found is that most meds take at least 1-2 months to get used to the effects.

If you take long release stimulant you may find this may well cause more arythmia as you will have to slowly build up to what u need for the focus for the whole day.

I've been through every med to try find one that worked but was actually looking for the magic tablet which there isn't .

Also give one tablet a good go.

The one I'm on lasts 13 hrs and has no side effects.

I've swapped as i has been on Ritalin for 6 yrs and found that I wanted a change as my body has got used to it

marxjenn profile image
marxjenn in reply toTiggerakafidgity

Your comments helped a lot. I will hang in there. Maybe I will go back to short term Ritalin again and take as needed. Might be my best bet. Thank you very much

ashlilly profile image
ashlilly in reply tomarxjenn

Try green tea extract pills or

L THEANINE. Ive read several articles on these and it seems to pretty helpful for a lot of people

Sharisaito profile image
Sharisaito

Hello ! It sounds more like she may be concerned for you if anything. There is a lot of info out there and real stories that lead people to be against these stimulants. A persons choice of religion can have influence over this as well. I never had been diagnosed with add as we didn't hear much about this while I was in school. But I did not do well and felt a "not there" feeling whenever studying or trying to learn something . I was definitely behind the rest and feel if my parents pushed on the concerns of me not doing well in school then I probably would have been told I had add . After all the struggles , I found out about this course at a dianetics mission. I took a course on how to study and it worked miracles!! I took this course in my 20s and thought wow why doesn't the schools use this basic study technique !! After all those years of painfully not knowing I learned with full knowing . My grades went up and first time in life my writing teacher told me I can write and do have something to pursue. I'm not saying to stop with what your doing. but I do encourage to find out about a basic study course called learning how to learn . Simple techniques, easy to understand and practice until it gets less of a problem to do it . I think everyone deserves this experience because it addresses confusion in it's entirety and remedies this with solid basic understandable practice . It's there and the course is no more than 50 . Changed how I thought about myself and the whole public education system. I learned I did not have the tools and that once I did I remedied my learning possibilities by myself !!

ashlilly profile image
ashlilly

Yes they are the same. The difference is brain chemistry. When someone who doesn't have ADHD takes these medications it makes them feel high. When someone who does have ADHD takes them it helps them with a dozen things. It doesnt make them feel high unless taken incorrectly. But I too was diagnosed at 17 witb ADHD and take ritalin and it has helped tremendoulsy. I am required to see my doctor every three months so she knows I am taking it correctly. Now why on earth would i want to risk losing a medication that helps me by abusing it? Your sister is just fortunate to not need medication to do daily tasks and to complete daily tasks. Your sister and you are also very fortunate because you didnt get to a bad point in your life before needing medicene. I used to cut myself for 7 years before being diagnosed and taking medicene so everyone that knows me knows that I need it. Your family may not know your struggles but you have a community of people who do and you have science that backs up the truth that adhd is a real thing and medication is sometimes needed.

MissGC profile image
MissGC

It’s a constant battle of judgements when you take a stimulant medication. From the PCPs (ironically), to the pharmacists, to anyone regular old Joe that finds out you are on stimulant meds. I still take my medicine though because at a Therapuetic dose it is a very useful tool in helping me feel “normal”, alert, and not overwhelmed. I just don’t share the fact that I take medicine with anyone except privately through the internet. The stigmas that the medicine can carry are very damaging psychologically, just like the ADD itself is. I’m sure you are a responsible person and I am happy that you found something to help your daily life.

HadEnuf profile image
HadEnuf

That screenshot may be an example of why stimulant medications need to be taken carefully, with discipline, BUT IS NOTHING MORE THAN THAT.

While Adderall is, in fact, pharmacologically similar to methamphetamine—EVEN “METH” CAN BE PRESCRIBED, LEGALLY, IN SIMILAR DOSES, FOR THE SAME CONDITIONS.

As a drug of abuse, methamphetamine is taken in much higher doses, in forms absorbed much more quickly, not unlike consuming a week's to a month's supply of an adult, therapeutic dose at once. (Sounds like a terrible way to die, and it is—ask my ER-doc brother-in-law who's had to fish baggies out of prisoners' body cavities without breaking them and killing the patient.)

IT'S LIKE THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN HAVING ONE BEER, AFTER WORK, AND GUZZLING A CASE TO GET SLOPPY DRUNK. Except for increased risk of theft and inability to replace a supply so lost (keep it secured), the substance means nothing and the dosage means everything.

[NOTE: There is also a less significant difference in the specific balance of amphetamine stereoisomers—like many in organic compounds, the molecule has “chiral” (literally, “handed”) symmetry, and the two forms have different effects. Other variations—like methylation—mostly alter bioavailability and uptake rate.]

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