Help..My trap of decision paralysis and ADHD

[KarlaJo]

I teach school (public elementary SpEd). Burn-out with the entire education field is beginning to happen. I’m tired of the regulations imposed by the Dept of Education (USA), excessive testing of students that do not show their knowledge on standardized tests, etc.

This July, I updated my resume. The day I did my resume, my Dad was rushed to the hospital and died three days later. I am dealing with the grief. He lived three miles from me- buried 1,000 miles away in the Midwest. The last thirty days ran together.

Here I sit. Teachers return to school on 8/12/2024. I put the priority of my Dad, his funeral and my own grieving first.

A trusted coworker has shared with me that my case load has the toughest pairing of students. They were her group last year. She is pleading with me that I upload my resume into the system and apply for other positions in different schools… this weekend.. She departed the school based on her own mental health issues.

Overwhelm….. Do I keep a positive attitude and go into the school year hoping for the best?

My goal was to prepare to leave the school system.

Life intervened.

I am seeing a therapist. However, I just learned of my caseload yesterday.

saw therapist on Weds.: am not going to have an appt until two weeks from now.

Looking for advise.

I don’t want to leap at a different position (with the stress of it all) right before the school year begins. Those waves of grief continue to happen. I’ve been at my current school for many years. The director of SPEd has zero empathy and reminds me of Ms Trunchbull in Matilda. She differs in that she likes children—- our SpEd department is more dysfunctional under our current director.

My ADHD brain and body is just in a moment of paralysis!

[Gettingittogether]

I hear you on the teaching and the overwhelm. I have taken medical leaves for my mental health because of grief and family illness and burnout with teaching. See if your job offers paid Family and Medical Leave. Sounds like you might be overwhelmed with anxiety right now (lots of people get overwhelmed this way without knowing that their state qualifies as "anxiety").

Make sure your therapist is excellent. Mediocre therapists don't work or work very slowly, You need top notch, something you find extremely smart and extremely helpful. In crisis, think about visiting therapist 2x a week. Also, what's your situation on meds? Are you on ADHD meds? My provider increased my ADHD meds during a time when my sister fell ill (three hours away) and I was driving back and forth to oversee her affairs. Also, you might benefit from anxiety or depression meds. (Lots of depression meds also treat anxiety.)

It's really important to get extra support (through therapy or meds or ideally both) in order to lower your stress and feeling of misery. Otherwise, it's impossible to think clearly and strategically when in misery and overwhelmed.

Also, you might want to hire an ADHD coach at least temporarily.

[KarlaJo in reply to Gettingittogether]

Thanks for your reply. I may need to bump my ADHD medication. I have been okay the last two weeks.

“It is really important to get extra support”is key.

I may need to find a different therapist. How does a person find an extremely smart and helpful one?

[Gettingittogether in reply to KarlaJo]

You may have to fire several therapists in a row. A good therapist for me is one who dazzles me, who sees me and my patterns and comes up with great suggestions. I once went through four or five therapists to finally get to one who was outstanding. You should know if they're great in one to two sessions.

[Mamamichl]

sped teacher here 👋🏼 too. I felt the overwhelm last year (went into inpatient psychiatric facility even). My supervisor sucked.

My question is do you have the support you need? I would look for work anytime you’re not 100% loving your position. However, it would not look the best if you just left this close to the beginning of the year. I would start the year as planned and do what you can. If after the first week you think you won’t make it, give your two week notice in (if you have another position lined up or you can afford not to have work for a bit).

I was resource room for k-8. It was my first position that started in January. I was not given the training I needed, and it didn’t work out (the place had more than 42% turnover rate last year). It was teachers against admin and we didn’t get the support. I’ve been looking for work all summer and just applied to unemployment this week. I’m hoping to find something or be a substitute for a while until I find a good fit.

Feel free to pm me if you want to bounce ideas or vent in any way. I’m here for you zen hugs 🫂

[KarlaJo in reply to Mamamichl]

Thanks for your reply.

I did start the year as planned. The kids were back on Monday. I have been doing okay. I did learn that when the caseload is more challenging, an extra instructional assistant has been added.

[Mamamichl in reply to KarlaJo]

Some of my students have one on one paras. It was nice having 2 sped teachers to a room so we could support each other if need be.

[LoveFeelsBest]

I think school in USA is among the greatest agents of control and indoctrination.

It’s probably the greatest tool of manupulation beside mass media

The curriculum is intentionally atrocious. The methods are disgustingly out of date.

For a century It’s been obvious that Montessori method is vastly superior to what is practiced in most schools, that is if the goal was actually to produce healthy happy well educated students.

Crafting obedient wage slaves is clearly the aim. Most teachers that have retained a scrap of decency feel like repugnant slime. Get out now!

[KarlaJo in reply to LoveFeelsBest]

It may be time to look at a Montessori school!