Please advise

[Boymom3]

My son just turned 13. He has been on Ritalin for 5 years and it has worked great. At some point, he was taking an afternoon dose at school bc teachers said he was noticeably fidgety, blurting out, not staying in his seat, etc. after morning dose wore off. That has worked for a few years now, but a month or so ago, he asked if he could stop the afternoon dose bc it made him feel depressed. I said we can try and talked to him about making an effort to control his mouth and pay attention. His grades are still great, but teachers say he has to be redirected often and he has zero filter on his mouth. He talks at inappropriate times, interrupts, says inappropriate things...it’s seen as simply being rude bc you can’t look at him and tell he has ADHD. That can absolutely effect how he is seen. He is a good football player, but the coach won’t let him on the team bc he sees him as a mouthy rude kid. He can’t be on medication every minute of the day, especially if it’s causing depression. He’s 13 so changing hormones could be playing a role in that??

Anyone have this experience and have any advice to offer?

I’m trying to get in touch with his prescribing doctor and looking into maybe social training? Is that a thing?😄 The Lord knows I have tried to help him, but he doesn’t see that he’s doing anything harmful and he thinks I don’t know what I’m talking about.

Also, his dad is 44 and still had trouble interrupting, changing subjects in mid conversation, not listening, all the things, so am I fighting a losing battle here??

[Momtrying]

I don’t know if I have anything too helpful except I feel in the same boat a bit. My 13 yr old is pretty mouthy. Borderline verbally abusive, mostly to family members. But he does let it slip out in school sometimes. I really believe they have no idea what they sound like to anyone else and yes, probably something he will deal with forever but I don’t think that is reason to not keep fighting the battle! My sons afternoon dose helps so much and i hate the evenings if he doesn’t take it, but I also wouldn’t want to be doing something that is causing depression. Have you thought about changing the medication completely? I know that brings a trial and error process which can be hard but might be something to ask about at your appointment. Is your son open to really talking about how he feels in the afternoons when he takes his medicine? That might help him deal with how he’s feeling but continue to take the medicine? I don’t know, just a thought.

When I’m at my wits end, I listen to a podcast or watch a video on kids with ADHD and tell myself to calm down because this is just how my son is and I need to pray for more patience with him 😂 but it is still very hard to deal with!

[Onthemove1971]

Thanks for sharing you struggles with you son. I was told that the proper- type of medication, with the proper dose and the proper timing can take away 60% of the symptoms of ADHD. For us we know this is a life long journey and I know when it is not working. We have our son on a long acting stimulant right before he walks out the house ( in fact to extend it I have some in the car so before he steps out I give it to him). He also takes a non stimulant which helps with mood, sleep and focus. This for us is the best. Our son also takes 20mg less of the stimulant in the afternoon..

Non of that would have been possible without our amazing child psychiatrist. So is such a great listener ove rhe many years we had her.

Could you ask for the second afternoon dose to be less and make the am last longer?

Just a few thoughts. I also agree they have no idea the impact of their behavior!

Good luck, hope this helps.

[KiaKaha1]

Have you tried Concerta? My 12 yr old son started it a few months ago and it has really helped. It is a timed release so he gets a dose in the morning and then a dip around lunch so he will eat, and then another large dose in the afternoon (all from one pill in the morning) which usually holds him until 6:30 or so. The differential dosing really helped keep him on track and also he does not have the side effects he had on Ritalin and Adderall. Worth a shot to ask about it if you have not tried it.