A poem from a teenager about the struggles of their ADD

[spb1234]

I am NOT a parent. I am an 18 year old college student who was diagnosed with ADD in fourth grade, since then I have taken 5 different medications (in groupings of about four years for three of those medications and the other two as afternoon boosters for the first two four year periods) and am currently taking Vyvanse, the fifth medication. I hope that this poem helps you, the parents of children with Attention Deficit Disorder, understand what your children are feeling and going through. I encourage you all to read this poem and to PM me for advice, to ask questions, or even just to talk about ADHD because I am on here to help you the parents of kids with ADHD so that they can succeed and hopefully do the same.

I feel broken

Like something isn’t right

But I can’t think of it

Not even to save my life

Because I am stuck, inside my head

Paralyzed, right where I stand

I wish there was something

That I could do to fix it

Because I hate this feeling

Of being useless

I get angry at myself

Because I cannot complete

Even the simplest of tasks

And because of my inability to focus

And to stay on track

And because I lack motivation and anxiety

It’s hard to push myself to do

--

Most people think that it just means that I’m

just stupid

But that’s just one big misconception

For as much as I possibly can

I try and try to do my best

Even with my medication I still battle this thing

that I have

Called the double edged sword

Of having Attention Deficit Disorder

[jschwab39]

I love this

[GreenOwl88]

Thank you for sharing. My daughter is 14 and high school is a huge challenge. I feel that I don't know what to say or do to help at times.

[spb1234 in reply to GreenOwl88]

Feel free to PM me if you ever need advice

[Pennywink]

Thank you so much for sharing!

[Hidden]

My biggest question is with repetition of doing the same thing over and over again when it's wrong and you tell your son it's wrong ,he receives consequences but he repeat himself. That's the part I don't understand and a bit confused. I know it was previously stated that ADD, children lack hindsight and foresight but I did not imagine repeatedly going through the same thing over,over and over. My son is 15, in 8th grade, has a 504 plan that helps a lot with his subjects. But now he has other things going on that is poor decision making. EVERYDAY it's something. What will your advice be to him on How to get it together. What direction should I take. Thank you for your poem, your information describes my son to the T.

[spb1234 in reply to Hidden]

It’s not that we lack hindsight. We see what we do wrong and we see our mistakes. It’s that we sometimes lack the abilities to act on it. It’s hard to give specific advice when I don’t know what he’s doing, or not doing for that matter, so if you need to, feel free to PM me for advice

[Grateful17]

Thank you for writing. The whole thing is unfair and ADD is an invisible disability. My daughter must feel exactly as you describe. She’s not enjoying her young twenties like she should .... She feels beat down and is struggling with school and friends. I wish I could get her more help, but she doesn’t want to be around me.

[spb1234 in reply to Grateful17]

Is she being treated for her ADD?

[Grateful17 in reply to spb1234]

She sees a doctor who prescribes Vyvanse and adderall (SA). She hates the medication and she feels it makes her non-social and non creative. She is extremely stubborn about seeking out how to better herself and not blame others for her actions. I wish she could find a perfect therapist or possibly try an antidepressant,

[spb1234 in reply to Grateful17]

If she hasn’t already, she should express how she feels to her doctor at her next med check

[Hidden]

For example, he started roaming off to the library, when he supposed to be in class, for one class he could be placed on school probation, because he received numerous amount of warnings for tardiness, he still headed to the library another class, he skipped altogether, and was warned, but yet again and was given 1hr detention. Again this is after repeatedly info. Yes he does not do this everyday but his impulse. This carry over to numerous things in his life, roaming away after school and missing the bus, certainly, I can go on and on but I will like to get him in the right direction with decision making or is this unrealist.

[spb1234 in reply to Hidden]

Is he medicated?

[Hidden in reply to spb1234]

He's medicated Vyvanse 60mg, schedule for a review in 2days, I was thinking about going nonstimulant like sterrtta (sp). He also takes zoloft for anxiety, guancfine for impulse and adderral in the afternoon as a carry over for evening homework.

[spb1234 in reply to Hidden]

I would bring his current behavior at his med check then. That’s as much advice that I can give as of now. I wish you and your son the best of luck

[Terrilynn04]

I was deeply saddened by your poem...thank you so much for sharing. My twin brother (we are turning 40 this year) has struggled his whole life to survive and make ends meet and it wasn’t until my daughter (6 years old) was diagnosed with severe ADHD that I realized what my brother has been battling his whole life...this poem describes how he has felt to a T. He just recently started going to a neurological psychiatrist for depression and will hopefully find the right medication to treat what has been holding him back from his amazing potential all along...

Thank you again for sharing...

[LL_Mom]

Thank you for sharing your thoughts and feelings. Please be proud of yourself in knowing that you are doing your best. That is all anyone can ask of themselves. Be kind to yourself if you can.

[Janice_H]

Wow! Thank you for sharing. My 11 y.o. boy is really struggling with depression because of his ADHD. He tries hard to be a good kid but can't seem to.

[Susan_24]

That was beautiful

[Specialneedsmom]

This is so beautiful thank you for sharing this and your feelings they are valid and need to be heard

[MGRAN]

I know this was posted 5 years ago but I am currently writing a POI piece in one of my classes and stumbled upon it. I am a 19 year old college student, I was also diagnosed with ADHD in fourth grade, and I'm currently taking vyvanse. Lately I have been struggling in school, more than I ever have before and it's taking a toll on my mental health. I haven't been able to put the reason into words or even fully understand it myself. This perfectly sums up what I am going through. I just want to say thank you for putting this out there for people to find, especially parents who do understand what their kids are going through.