My family don't get my depression!

I have been suffering from depression and anxiety for 1year now I attend a cpn weekly and a behavioural therapist fortnightly. I was admitted into hospital as I couldn't eat thought I was choking to death every time I ate. My sister who is abit hateful said just put food in your mouth and eat and get out of hospital and get on with your life. I think she sees me as a failure as I was totally normal before, she is abit of a snob and I think she's embarrassed by me now. She actually came round my house and said my mum was Giving me and my kids to attention and her and her kids were left out the arguments got heated and she punched me of course we havnt spoken in weeks over this. If only she knew the problems I face daily! This just goes to show you find out who loves you when your down

18 Replies

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  • I find people are hurtful out of ignorance rather than intention (i lie, i think some people have full intention, but i do think instance is definitely ignorance). A kick up the bum might be what you need when you didnt get that job interview, it is NOT what you need when trying to manage depression! Honestly, some people really don't get it. You'll find lots of people here you can talk to, who understand where youre coming from. I only wish i could tell you that they will get it one day soon, but unfortunantly i don't think thats true. Try and manage your expectations of people, if you know someone has a negative impact on you or your life, intentional or not, then try and spend more time with people who don't. Don't push anyone away, like i said its ignorance not intent but take care of yourself, sometimes we're all we have x

  • I completely understand where you're coming from. I tried once, only once, to talk to my family about how I was feeling. My Mum assured me that it's ok to feel like that now and again at my age, and that I'd soon get over it (bless her ignorance!) My sister who is a trained mental health social worker told me to stick my hormones up my arse and another sister told me to stop showing off! People just don't understand depression. In work people regard anyone with mental health issues as being a bit 'wobbly' and they are overlooked when it comes to progression within the company. I've kind of given up trying to make real people understand what's happening for me. Instead I chat to people on forums like this as I find that the majority of people can offer really helpful advice and support. X

  • Thank you for your lovely messages and I am so happy I have you all to talk to on Here xx

  • Thank you for your lovely messages and I am so happy I have you all to talk to on Here xx

  • Hi Annie My family are the same as yours. In my experience families don't tend to understand depression. It sounds as if your sister is jealous of you anyway and your depression was just an excuse. I agree with the above comment - stay away from negative people whether family or not. You don't need that right now.

    I have a sister who has suffered from acute anxiety for many years. She won't go for treatment so she probably won't get better. She can't eat most foods - says they choke her! So I know from experience how this can affect someone.

    Its great that you are having therapy. Hopefully this will enable you to deal with your depression and anxiety though it might take some time.

    We all understand depression and anxiety here and are always here for you Annie.

    Bev xx

  • hi Annie,

    When I first got sick and couldn't eat anything I found that soup was a good solution. It just slurps on down, no chewing so no choking. Some soups are very nutricious and warming in the winter. It worked for me, see if you can try some soup. And I do believe that people who don't suffer with depression can't understand how we feel. And that is what is so brilliant about this site, everyone knows exactly how you feel. Try thye soup and I wish you all the very best. xx

  • Interesting post and I'm in the same boat.

    The last two days have been unbearable for me - I don't think I can handle another one. I have stopped eating as my food doesn't taste of anything. My sleep is down to an hour or two per night and I can't even read my books as my mind is all over the place.

    I am in such a bad mood all the time and I have no friends, social life, no job, no money and no hope for the future. I'm stuck in a dead end ghost town with nobody to talk to.

  • Sure you have a soical life your on here tellings us how you feel thats got to be a start, I know its hard but try and find at least one positive thing to hang on to.

    Food and sleep who needs em (ok most people now and again) what you need are some friends.....

  • You stay strong scotlandthebrave there is some1 to talk to and we on Here will help support you if you need to talk. Life is really tough sometimes but think of good x

  • i have seriously been thinking what is the point to life cant find one dont see nt family only have one friend who can be a bit patronising and know it all so i have noone to talk to.where is all the support we are supposed to get cant access it, i go all week without anyone to talk to.

  • Refrigerate you always have us on Here to talk to. Never feel alone

  • Hi everyone, yes I can empathise with you on the family stuff. My family dont have a clue, and really I am over that. Please realise that no family is perfect, most are quite dysfunctional, so dont look for kindness or understanding, because you will make yourself worse. Be a friend for yourself, treat yourself well and dont judge yourself, we are all unique, be self reliant. You will always have friends on here who understand and care, we are all one big cosmic family, so now be happy, we are your family in a way. I no longer blame my family for not understanding Depression, there is a lot of fear and stigma about it, so thats why family are not much help. Be your own best friend, treat yourself to a bunch of flowers, a hot chocolate, a magazine, or a CD, I know its hard if you are broke, But keep the faith, and stay in touch with people on line.

  • I live alone, and sometimes since I retired I dont talk to a soul all day, I have a kitten and I talk to her and I have some friends, but its hard, so dont feel alone, life can be lonely, but hey we have this Forum, I live in Dublin myself, and have a good few interest, but sometimes I wonder what keeps me going. I guess its the lifeforce. Anyway each posting has really helped me, so thank you all for sharing.

  • My partner never believes me either, just thinks I need to get over what I have, but it is so hard when I have no support :(

  • People just don't get it but one day they will maybe experience it for a day and see how we live our daily lives x

  • i think this is the hardest thing for people to understand,you have to go through it yourself to fully understand,i have a fantastic family,but they dont know how to help me,this is the worst i have ever been,i have seen four drs over the past week,one of them said "what more do you want me to do? but thankfully i have since seen two other drs who have really helped ,and i have an apt for my first counselling session next week,i just want to be normal again,and be able to cope with everything.

  • Annie51 I no what you mean it's awful when people you love font get it. I'm considering .going away from my family now as all ever do lately is judge me and talk behind my back I'm so upset :(

  • cut infront of them lol

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