Lori....: Well you suggested about... - Mental Health Sup...

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Lori....

CJ2016 profile image
25 Replies

Well you suggested about buying a camera and i did just that,to keep me occupied,and to keep my mind off of the urge to cut,here is one of the first pictures i taken with the camera.

Granted at first i screwed it up because i forgot to take the cap off and was wondering why the hell can't i see nothing(duhh) i taken a few but that shot i like more then the others because of the cloud's about to come over and i think it gives it more character.

I have an even closer picture of the moon then that,but i like the somewhat cloudy one,but yeah apperciate the support(talking) you have been given me since i have been posting on here.

Hopefully this will just keep my mind occupied until i have manned up enough to actually go to the Drs.

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CJ2016 profile image
CJ2016
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25 Replies
CJ2016 profile image
CJ2016

thank you,and yeah you should give it another go,it's a good distraction i think.

CJ2016 profile image
CJ2016

Yeah last time i took any photos was a few years ago, used a 8 mega pixel compact thing,(tried a bit of ghost hunting,another phase i went through) lol,but yeah first time actually using a decent camera at least.

CJ2016 profile image
CJ2016

Thanks for the compliment's,i like using my imagination,being creative,it's the only time i feel really free(from the crazyness that goes on in my head)

Because it gives me that one thing to concentrate on rather then a 1000 things,and don't give up,keep trying,it's just about getting that one shot,it does not matter if other people don't like it.

I took a good couple of pictures of the moon,but out of all of them,that picture is the one that draw's me in,it's the one that show's me character,it give's me a vibe that the other's do not.

I think anything you create,be it stories,pictures,paintings,music, it's all about what you feel when you look at it,read it,hear it,and what it means to you.

It becomes a part of your story in a sense,nobody's story has to make sense to anyone else,only the person that's directing it,i.e you. so keep trying :)

LoriMS61 profile image
LoriMS61

I love it, thank you for this post. The moon is amazing. I love the quality, and the clouds.

I also love the universality of the moon. We are all under it together.

Good on you CJ!

This made my day.

Lori

XxxxxX

CJ2016 profile image
CJ2016 in reply to LoriMS61

Glad you liked it,and again thanks for all the advice you have given me thus far since i have been on here :)(so far i have not had the urge to cut tonight) so so far so good,my mind feels occupied

Xxx

LoriMS61 profile image
LoriMS61 in reply to CJ2016

That's awesome. You have a real talent. I like to try and capture moments of beauty. Glimpses of sunlight through summer leaves, or proud flowers dancing in the wind. I'm really into capturing the flight of birds at the moment too. I love the majesty of birds of prey.

Keep sharing!!!

CJ2016 profile image
CJ2016 in reply to LoriMS61

Thanks Lori, was hoping to take some photo's last night as it was thunder and lightening but the downpour and cloud cover made it so that it was not that great to get a decent picture

And yeah birds are pretty cool, when ever i see a bird i think, where has it flown to, and how free it must feel flying in the sky, or gliding through the air.

And having the ability to just "be free" period, the ability to fly between the trees and mountains, and everywhere makes them lucky to some extent

That's a lovely shot, truly. Well captured! :)

Out of curiosity, ever tried playing music? The most free I have ever felt is during times of interactive musical improvisation. It is for me an indescribable feeling!

CJ2016 profile image
CJ2016 in reply to

Hey Thomas, yeah i tried learning the piano(teaching my self) a few years back, playing stuff like moonlight sonata(funnily enough) but after a while got bored(as per norm with everything i do)

And i agree about music being a good outlet, i find it can change your mood as well, be it from feeling hyper to becoming more depressed(depending on what you listen to)

MattBuckland profile image
MattBuckland

Hi Cj

Nice pic, atmospheric.

Laters, Matt

DavidGee profile image
DavidGee

Photography is amazing as an outlet to express yourself freely

CJ2016 profile image
CJ2016 in reply to DavidGee

Yeah i agree, as the saying goes "a picture can speak a 1000 words"

Lizbett profile image
Lizbett

Oh CJ that is a beautiful shot!!! What type of camera are you using?

Yes take lots and lots of pictures because it is a distraction.

I seriously love that photo. Well done! x

CJ2016 profile image
CJ2016 in reply to Lizbett

Hi liz thank you, the Camera is a Sony HX400 50X Zoom Bridge Camera.

Hopefully if it does not rain too much(got to love welsh weather) ill be able to get out without getting drenched. X

Lizbett profile image
Lizbett in reply to CJ2016

Thanks for replying CJ 😊Wales is beautiful .... you're gonna have sooooo much fun taking pictures!

Can't WAIT to see more from you. I'm seriously excited for you! x

CJ2016 profile image
CJ2016 in reply to Lizbett

Thank you,and yeah being in the valley's we at least get some nice scenery around us at least,and i have some idea's of other pictures i would like to capture so hopefully ill be able to capture the pictures i want.

i have to admit it's only been 1 day(this now being the 2nd) i have not hard the urge to cut,for the first time in weeks, so seems to be working.

Feeling pretty good at the moment to,but i know it wont always be like this,(pretty unpredictable how long the good mood(exciteable feeling) will last)

so hopefully ill be brave enough to actually go to the Drs eventually,even if i still feel good,because obviously there are still issues that need resolving. X

Lizbett profile image
Lizbett in reply to CJ2016

One day at a time darlin ... one issue at a time, k? x ☺

CJ2016 profile image
CJ2016 in reply to Lizbett

yeah for now ill take everyday as it comes,baby steps if you will :) x

Lizbett profile image
Lizbett in reply to CJ2016

Yep ☺

CJ2016 profile image
CJ2016 in reply to Lizbett

Think i have pretty much spent most of the morning playing about with the camera,so even when not taking pictures,there are a lot of settings to figure out lol :) x

CJ2016 profile image
CJ2016

Hey Fi3h sorry for the late reply,and yeah i only taken 1 or 2 photo's as i have been pretty busy with work and not had time to do much else, the two photographs i did take,are nothing special,went with the more "artistic" vibe rather then detail.

quality is not great as i had to cut the image down to upload it using that site,still getting use to the camera. The images are black and white,thought black and white would be better for the two images that i captured.

In regard's to how my mood is,it's been ok the last two days,i have been pretty good,it's been a while since my mood has felt like this,last time it actually felt liket this was when i had my "Upper" for 10 months,i am skeptical though as to how long my mood will stay like this though.

I have not thought about suicide,i have not had the urge to cut,i have been getting by on less sleep then what i have required for the last 8 months or so,people around me are not complaining about how my mood is, so yeah all in all its been ok.

When it's like this it really does make it more difficult to go to the Dr's,but i know how sudden my mood's can change,and how low they can go,but for the moment im just taking it day by day

Anyway here are the two pictures,nothing special,nothing great,just "different" i guess.

postimg.org/image/s3mxllot5/

CJ2016 profile image
CJ2016

Yeah i rather black and white pictures,black is my favorite colour,and i wouldn't be suprised if there are filters for camera's out there that give the colour-blind aspect(to some extent)

And thank you,maybe it's also due to not having time to think because work is starting to become hectic(leading up to xmas it always is) so i am just constantly on the go.

In regards to the self harm,yeah it's been a while since i have not had the urge to cut,which is good,because now my arm's can actually have a chance to heal up,not having me cut over and over and over.

I wouldn't say im talented,i just like to think that i think a lot lol.

I actually told my(future sister in law) today about the low's(not the self harm though) and she was trying to get me to go to the Drs,but as i told her,when your on an "up" or just feel "good" it's hard to feel that there is anything wrong(even though your mood swings back and four).

But thanks Fi3h,hope all is good with you,and if not i hope it gets better :)

CJ2016 profile image
CJ2016

Yeah i know she is right,as well as everyone on here,telling me to go(they are right also) but i am my own worse enemy.

In regards to the instagram,i am not much of a social media type of person,i have twitter and face book but only use that for football and family.

And also i don't think my photo's are at that standard to be sharing them everywhere lol.

CJ2016 profile image
CJ2016

Yeah snapchat has been around just as long as twitter and facebook,but now seem's to be in the "in" thing,due to the filters it has(it use to be because pictures deleted after 10 secs as well,but i think that feature has gone now and images can be saved)etc etc i don't see the hype behind it personally.

CJ2016 profile image
CJ2016

Lol, yeah there is so many forms of online communication its easier jst sticking to the one.

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