Help with depression/anxiety

I am in my second year of university now and since the very beginning of this academic year I've been feeling very low and just generally not myself. My long-term boyfriend started uni this year and I think that has been a major factor in the low moods I've been experiencing. What turned into one initial week of worry has just continued for the past few months. I go to bed crying nearly every night and wake up panicked and feeling very alone. I feel like I have no one to turn to as I do not want to be a burden to anyone. My mood feels so low some days I just want to lie in bed and wish the day away so I can just cry and go back to sleep. If someone doesn't talk to me or make the effort that I make with them I think it's because they don't care and don't love me. I know it's an overreaction and not like me at all because I have become so insecure about myself. I really don't know what to do any more. My family, friends and boyfriend do love me but I feel like I can't explain to them exactly how I am feeling. Has anyone else felt similar?

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  • Hi this sounds like it could be depression but obviously I am no doctor and even if I was couldn't diagnose you over the internet. You must have a counsellor at Uni - have you thought of having a chat with them? It might well help. If not seek help from a doctor. x

  • Hello

    If you are at University you will have a Counsellor, make that appointment, they will most probably help and give support.

    Boyfriends and Uni do not really mix believe me. I went through the same sort of thing and the distraction was to great as my Courses were engineering and very complex.

    When we are in love it can be a very greedy situation where love and study become in conflict, both of you are studying and also trying to pass very important tickets, love seems to take over and studies become a poor second.

    Generally it is difficult to advise as you are bound to stand up in His defence, although you do say life has been a big distraction, you need to remove those feelings and concentrate on the cost of expensive, extensive studies. I do not know how your family are feeling. I remember what went on at home and the conflict was very distracting. I would hate to be a fly on the wall.

    If you do need a chat we are here

    Good Luck

    BOB

  • Hi hun, I am so sorry you are struggling hard and feeling so low. How was your first year at uni? I remember my daughter had a good first year and I was so relieved as she too gets very bad bouts of depression, her second yr was one of those bouts and was very difficult.

    although it was a huge struggle she found seeing the uni councillor helped a little and for her she needed to keep doing something that she loved even though it was a struggle to make herself do it even though she knew it would help. For her it was horses so got her out, exercised and focused so she wouldn't be playing some of her problems over and over in her mind.

    Crying yourself off to sleep is one of the worst things, which will cause bad sleeping patterns as well as waking the following morning in dread. Try hard to find something last thing at night to distract you from the inner feelings of unhappiness, either by watching something soothing, reading something upbeat or music. It's very hard at first to get yourself into a pattern where you can do this when life seems too much of a struggle, but little by little it will help and you can slowly start to find things that bring more enjoyment into your life.

    University can be the best and worst time of your life, there is so much going on as in clubs and activities as well as all the socializing, but it can be impossible to do these things when you don't have any conference to do them, although there can be some help and guidance out there, you need to be the one who thinks about what you want to do, even if you are anxious or depressed, it's the first step of trying to change things and feeling better about yourself.

    I hope you are home for the holidays and can feel a little better surrounded by those who love you. This cloud that's over you will move away and better times will come, so don't ever convince yourself otherwise, I know it doesn't always seem that way, but I have not only seen my own ups and downs, but those of my children and their friends and even when they seemed to find themselves at the bottom of a pit, I have seen them recover and be so happy.

    Take care sweets, you can get through this and have a wonderful lifetime of experiences to come. Xxx

  • Best Wishes and hugs. Hopefully things will look brighter in the New Year. Regards Lorna

  • I too am in my second year at uni and you seem to have described word for word how I feel at the moment. I kind of came into the academic year feeling a bit apprehensive and that only seems to have grown in the last term. I thought it might be connected to essay deadlines, as they were all in the same week, but try as I might, I just couldn't summon the energy to deal with them; eventually forcing myself to write two essays the night before they were due and finishing at 6am in the morning.

    This has extended into my relations with my housemates, where I seemed to idolise one and then just condemn the other for no particular reason to the point that whatever he says or does just annoys me.

    I just wanted you to know that you're not alone and others do feel similar.

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