Do you really want to be "cured" or do you ... - Above & Beyond

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Do you really want to be "cured" or do you merely want to thrive?

ToLiveLikeWeRDying profile image

Wouldn't you say those that suffer from depression are too smart for their own good? We know why we are the way we are, we know we can do x, y, z, but yet we never change. I ask if you really want to change? Maybe the problem is trying to be "normal" instead of accepting yourself for who you are. Depression doesn't need to be cured, instead maybe we have to learn how to thrive with it. Meaning, better self talk, exercise, eating healthy, making sure your magnesium, vitamin d and iron is being taken. We are deep thinkers who care and feel everything, it can be a lot to handle for anyone! I think if we can get our body and mind to be at the same place, we can find a secret weapon in our beautiful depression.

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Welcome to our Community ToLiveLikeWeRDying

Very interesting post and one I agree with. This topic came up a few days ago that 'depressed people don't want to get better' In my opinion, we have neither the will or inclination to 'get better' simply because our condition determines that. Yes,we should learn to accept ourselves but I wouldn't advise taking supplements before consulting your Doctor.


Like when ppl try to help and say you're just lazy. I'm not lazy at work, I'm not lazy with taking care of those I love, I'm only lazy with helping myself. Depression already makes you in a way obsessed with yourself, so helping yourself almost feels like suicide or abandonment. I've been in and out of depression since childhood, maybe depression is trying to show us something. In a world where you have to be always busy and trying to climb to the top, to be compliant with the little things in life makes you an outcast. Depression doesn't make me a hippie or the pope but I believe I'm a better person because of it. I don't think meds are the answer, only hard work on changing your thoughts and actions. Proper nutrition and exercise. Plastic, chemicals and our food is making us sick in more ways than one. At my worst I only want to sleep or lay around, but even then I still can be the observer of my thoughts, then you stop letting your mind drift and instead repeat to yourself statements or mantras of what's great about yourself and who you want to be. No one ever lied when they said fake it till you make it. You gotta trick yourself, but not everyone can. That's why we have to help each other. Love and the proper care is truly healing. Depression makes you isolate yourself and you hide it as much as you can to not burden others... and what saves me from the darkest despairs is knowing I'm not alone. Is seeing others talk about it openly and not being ashamed. Maybe then you can heal that inner wound enough to thrive.

Absolutely agree ToLiveLikeWeRDying

Thank you for your post.


Mony1234 profile image
Mony1234 in reply to chloe40

Some people have a good life not me being abused when I was younger scared of my brother all the time bed wetting and other things still stuck in my mind today and other things from time to time can't forget I will always be depressed till I die I think so I know how all of you feel medication isn't the answer should have never happened but it did

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I understand what you are saying ToLiveLikeWeRDying. I certainly agree that it is better to look after our mind and our body as a whole. I am not quite sure the medical profession treats our minds and our bodies as a whole, though I believe they are getting better at this. I have been raising this with them for many years.

I see helping myself with depression as an opportunity or a journey. Identifying negative and unhelpful self-talk and ways that no longer serve me. Learning new positive self-talk and adopting new ways that serve me well. I guess it is turning into a journey of self-discovery although it has taken many years to reach this point. My hard and incredibly painful work is starting to pay dividends and I am able to be more positive. I still have 'bad/depressed' times and need support but I bounce back quicker because I am so much more self-aware. I am determined that I will reach a point where I can live and manage my life with little professional support.


ToLiveLikeWeRDying profile image
ToLiveLikeWeRDying in reply to Hidden

You're on your way I can tell! If you believe if you can achieve it! All you described is exactly what it's been like for me. And you hit with knowing when to reach out and get support, really helps get you out of the fog. Remember that a lot of professional health ppl went into hoping to help themselves, or don't relate at all. Always work on the relationship with self and you will see you become your own therapist in time. We all need to be self aware to be that third party to ourselves, it's a journey not a destination.

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Hidden in reply to ToLiveLikeWeRDying

Thank you for your kind words ToLiveLikeWeRDying. I quite agree with your comments and believe that we do need to learn to become our own therapist and learn to be self aware.

Thanks again, Lottie

I think you make a lot of sense n he way you have spelt it out. Two things strike me: We get a lot more help than we did 20 years ago, and we are in good company--think of Beethoven, Dickens, et al.

I also really like your comments. Bouncing back from depression and supside attempts has made me more grateful for friendship and the small things like the sound of the sea and warmth of the sun. I'very lost Josh and found jobs. Lost love and found it again. In adversity somethng or someone has energised me. I've learned that no situation is worth killing myself over

No matter how bad I feel at the time.

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This made me feel better. Thank you.

A big part of depression, for me, is the phrase often said/suggested/indicated we--I are

not wanted. It seems, there is nowhere to turn for flavor, involvement, a welcome, or to

give/take. It has often been FUN ! ! to tell me, or suggest, I am not wanted or not making

the grade. Low end jobs and dating of the other gender that are NOT highly desired are

often what we settle for. People ''low end'' are better than being alone too long, and a

job that is routine and low pay is better than nothing. I was living above income, had to declare bankruptcy twice, my 401k was eaten up, and shamefully my parents kicked in

THEIR savings to help keep me afloat. I have earned a Master's in Business and a long

line of positive references. Compliments come for being artistic, intelligence, personality,

and involvement. I can not make a positive connection with somebody who can help

me, or will let me help them. I am a life long "Good Boy ! ! " and that is supposed to

thrilling, when people younger than me leap ahead for a career and family. Being

'nice' and 'good' were rules I heard, and the indication came the other is in the right.

"He's a jerk!" or terms might be he/she is a bully, obnoxious, enjoys making other

miserable, but no, THEY are in the right. Life has passed me by, and I have felt

for years I am simply waiting to die. That will change things. I have a nowhere job, no

training or future. I leave, feeling I can do better somewhere else, and fall face first.

Where I was working I did have security, benefits, and seniority. "It's going to work

out !" is one of those sayings which do not always work out. Thanks for reading this

if you hung on that long.

The need for acceptance is always there, but remains elusive, we have trouble getting a

life. People seem to take me lightly,

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