Seeking Support to Manage Intense Emotions and Negative Thoughts Toward My Partner's Dog

[Golden_Dawn]

Hi everyone,

I’m going through a difficult time and feel like I need support and guidance. I’m in a relationship that I value deeply, but there’s one issue that’s becoming increasingly overwhelming for me: living with my partner’s dog. I’m not entirely sure why, but I struggle a lot with the dog’s presence, and it triggers a mix of intense emotions like frustration, anger, and sadness. I know the dog is very important to my partner, but I feel increasingly weighed down, and these feelings are affecting my emotional well-being and our relationship.

On top of this, I’m also in a challenging phase—I’m unemployed and find myself in a cycle of negative thoughts that I can’t seem to break. I’ve tried different strategies to improve my relationship with the dog, but nothing seems to work, and I’m feeling emotionally exhausted. I’m in couples therapy, but I find it hard to fully open up because I’m afraid of being judged or hurting my partner.

I’d love to receive support or hear from anyone who may have gone through something similar. Any advice on how to manage these feelings and thoughts in a healthier way would be greatly appreciated. I feel like this negativity isn’t really who I am, but these thoughts and emotions are taking over my life and my relationship.

Thank you for reading, and I appreciate any guidance you can share.

[Apollomycat]

Sorry you are feeling like this and I hope you get better soon but please don't hurt that innocent dog, it's not the dogs fault you have these problems and you are probably making the dog feel sad. I think your partner should be aware of how you feel towards the dog just to be on the safe side.

[wobblybee Administrator Pioneer]

It’s likely you would reach more people coping with their ‘feelings’ ..on a different Healthunlocked Community..

healthunlocked.com/anxiety-...

[Ellie-Louise]

Are you afraid the dog might attack you? there are stories in the news about attacks all the time, it may be that deep down in your subconscious you are afraid of the same happening to you. So you aren’t letting yourself warm towards the dog.

It is probably picking up on your negativity, a dog knows when it isn’t liked. Maybe offer it some treats and the dog will start to befriend you.

You say you are unemployed, so you have plenty of time to take it out and enjoy walks together. But first you must make friends with your boyfriends dog.

[Eeeeebygum]

Why not have your counselling on your own you can then be totally open. Also being outside and exercising is also be shown to be massively beneficial to our wellbeing. As an added bonus you could walk the dog with you it may help you to bond with it. You’ll be amazed at how soon you become a dogs best friend when you walk them.

[IPNH]

I don't really like dogs myself. I find caring for pets overwhelming. I don't think it would be a dealbreaker though. Maybe you could find times you have breaks from the dog. We have restrictioned access to certain areas of our home for our pets. They cannot use some areas and are not allowed on furniture. They are crated at night. Hopefully if you find something else to occupy your time it could help. Perhaps you could spend time away from home during certain times of the day to take some pressure off

[Penquin1965]

Can't you go to therapy for your self to see why you have these negative thought and about dog situation. is it because your home all is it because you're lost your job and your at home with the dog. Your use to having your own money from job and now your reliant on your partner. Practise

STOPP /

STOP

TAKE A STEP BACK

OBSERVE THE SITUATION . PERCEIVE WHAT CAN /CAN'T BE

PRACTICE WHAT YOU THINK.

Hope this helps and you need to say how you feel with your partner, it'll be hard but you need, to other wise it will get worse.

[lawntonmedicals]

Thank you for your concern and suggestions. I appreciate the idea of therapy and the STOPP technique. I know I need to take a step back and reflect on my feelings. You're right; being at home and relying on my partner has been tough. I’ll definitely consider talking openly with my partner about how I feel. It’s important to address these thoughts before they escalate. Thanks for your support!

[Booch]

I would suggest individual counseling if you are afraid to speak up in front of others. Have you tried taking the dog alone on a walk once a day for at least 20 minutes. Maybe he needs to bond with you and vice versa. Could it just be simple jealousy that your partner cares for something else? Seek private help.