I'm upset and I don't know why. - Weight Loss Support

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I'm upset and I don't know why.

IamwhatIam517
IamwhatIam5173 stone

Hi all. Be warned there some covid19 talk and morbid thinking in this post sorry. I know its everywhere.

I freaked myself out last night by reading all the news reports about obesity and covid, how someone of my weight and BMI has a 50% greater chance of dying if I get the virus. This has really gotten into my head and I mentioned it to a few people at work. No one at work knows I'm losing weight and I want to keep it that way. One lady (she's lovely) mentioned about my fears and how I should use this warning as motivation. This has upset me and I can't put my finger on why. I haven't told a soul that I've lost weight (35lbs), I wear my usual baggy clothes so that no one will suspect, when people have asked I've avoided answering. For some reason this motivation talk has upset me. It may be the stark proof that despite a decent loss no one can see it in my face or clothes (which are getting lose). I've always had a bad relationship with being given advice and do the reverse of what people advise in a "stuff you" manner, I'm trying incredibly hard to stop doing this because when it comes to my weight I have to lose it for my health. Nasty little thoughts are now creeping in saying "you can't do this....you started too late and purely due to you being fat if you get covid its going to kill you....you've got another 10 stone to go you barely done anything so far".

So sorry for this very depressing I post. I needed to get it out of my head.

97 Replies
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IndigoBlue61
IndigoBlue61Maintainer

Oh you have my sympathy. For what it’s worth I ALWAYS do exactly the opposite of anything I’m told to do, don’t ask me why!! Lol 😂

Confidence really is key, if we start to worry that we won’t achieve something, then we won’t, I’m so pleased that you have come on here to share, I truly believe our lovely members will help boost your positivity.

Regards your COVID fear, I think we are all the same, it’s a cliche but this really is a scary time. BUT you are 35lbs smaller than you were, that will have significantly improved your health. Aside from weight loss, you are eating better and making other changes to your health that will have long lasting benefits, that is an amazing achievement 😊👏👍

So stick with it, you are doing really well, every day gets you a little nearer to your goal

Indigo

IamwhatIam517
IamwhatIam5173 stone in reply to IndigoBlue61

Thank you, I didn't know who else I could tell. This forum keeps me going at times x

SofaJockey
SofaJockeyAdministrator

I can relate to your post. I've been working hard losing weight to help my health and bolster my immune system.

But here's the thing.

You can do this, and you're not too late because 35lbs done is awesome and every further pound improves your odds of having a less difficult Covid if you catch it.

Doesn't need to be 10 stones to be a benefit. You already have a benefit from the journey so far and from every stone to come.

I suspect you don't really need anyone to tell you this as you're already doing it. 😄

IamwhatIam517
IamwhatIam5173 stone in reply to SofaJockey

Thank you for your reply, it helped x

Lytham
LythamSuper Host 3 stone

My weight is a touchy subject for me so I don't talk too much about it at work (so pleased I have you guys) and I think people are aware of that and darent comment! :-)

Every pound we lose is a bonus and a step closer to a healthier happier us, keep going hun!! :-) x

IamwhatIam517
IamwhatIam5173 stone in reply to Lytham

I've got a lot of history and I think people feel embarrassed mentioning anything to me either way. I'll keep going x

Lytham
LythamSuper Host 3 stone in reply to IamwhatIam517

Me too, I think you're right, we'll get there hun! :-) x

Oh dear, I’m sorry this upset you. The thing to remember is, other people don’t look that closely at one another; I might notice a haircut if it’s drastically different, or a new beard or moustache, or a pregnancy, but I think it would take a massive weight loss or gain for me to notice it in a colleague one way or another? Especially as we are in a pandemic our heads are full of extra stuff to worry about. I dropped a size in trousers and no one noticed - but luckily I think they also didn’t really notice my original journey in the other direction. It’s only when I look back at things like group Christmas party photos, side by side, that I see changes over time... I hope this helps? 35 lbs is a fantastic achievement, don’t let this set you back, just keep going 😊

IamwhatIam517
IamwhatIam5173 stone in reply to SewMore

You've described very well how unobservant I am! Haha. Can understand why no-one has noticed what I have lost so far; which is good because that what I've tried to ensure. I'm so backwards. Thank you.

slipstick
slipstick1 stone

Well there's always being over 65 and having diabetes and a couple of other conditions to add to being overweight. All contribute to the chances you'll die of Covid 19 and I've got the lot. I love the way the scientists talk about "multiple co-morbidities", now there's a frightening phrase for you.

I'm not going to get any younger and they don't seem to be able to cure most things so I'm just losing some weight (for me not for anyone else). Oh and in my normal spirit of refusing to do what I'm told I've decided I'm not going to catch the blasted virus.

A bit of being bolshy always cheers me up. Give it go!

IamwhatIam517
IamwhatIam5173 stone in reply to slipstick

Love the reply thank you. Bolshy love! I'm cheering you on for your weight loss journey x

lucigret
lucigretAdministrator

Do you think it has upset you because the 'lovely lady' has not noticed that you already have the motivation and have in fact done seriously well so far? If you are still wearing the same clothes there is less chance that they will notice. I don't honestly think many people take in the size of their colleagues at work, certainly not on a daily basis.

I don't discuss my weight loss journey with anybody other than my husband and daughter and occasionally my son. It is not a conversation I am happy to have with just anybody, especially as the advice they give I know is wrong.

As for Covid I hear your fears, my advice is not to listen to too much information on the TV. I have seen some of the people that have survived covid on the TV and some have been very overweight. Follow the guidelines, wear a mask, keep your distance and keep washing your hands. Above all though, don't let this undo all the wonderful work you have done. You can do this because it is what you want for you, nobody else. You are already much healthier than you were :)

IamwhatIam517
IamwhatIam5173 stone in reply to lucigret

Thank you. You have a good point there, that may have been why. I've managed all on my own so far (besides this forum), think part of me wanted to say "it motivated me 3 months ago".

lucigret
lucigretAdministrator in reply to IamwhatIam517

Keep going, they will notice in time😊. I hope you are feeling a bit more relaxed😊

Fran182716
Fran182716Restart August 2020

I understand your fears, at the beginning of the pandemic I had so much anxiety about it I was having panic attacks and needed anti anxiety medication which I’m still taking.

You have already lost a good amount and this will have already helped your health. You’re doing great - keep going! Saying this in a very caring and supportive way 😀 I get the “stuff you” feeling but it’s possible if this work colleague is usually lovely she genuinely cares but phrased it badly!

IamwhatIam517
IamwhatIam5173 stone in reply to Fran182716

Thank you. You're very right. This lady has a habit of ruffling feathers but her heart is always in the right place x

Greendream123
Greendream123Soup Off winner

You're doing such an amazing job - you have a 2 stone badge, not many people have that. It shows how dedicated you must have been so far. People at work noticed the last time I lost a stone, it was well meaning but quite awkward. I think I gave up shortly after. It's nice to be encouraged by close friends and family though.

I haven't thought much about my chances being higher due to my weight, even when my partner had to get tested yesterday (luckily that was negative). Perhaps it could help spur you? You could try to challenge your thoughts and change "if you get covid its going to kill you....you've got another 10 stone to go you barely done anything so far," to, "I am taking positive steps to improve my health and reduce my risk of serious complications if I did catch Covid-19. I have already lost 2 stone, which is a huge achievement, and will continue to make changes for my long term health and wellbeing."

What do you think? Sometimes it can help to write negative thoughts down and challenge or rewrite them.

IamwhatIam517
IamwhatIam5173 stone in reply to Greendream123

Thank you for your reply. I'll try that x

Same here!

It's a weird feeling, even if other people is right about whatever they tell me I hate people telling me what to do... And I don't why 🤷🏻‍♀️ Usually I take gentle suggestions a bit better than affirmations. And if I'm the one asking for advice it's ok but if someone just come up with a 'You have to...' without even been asked 😠

2 stones already is a big achievement, keep going,we are here for long term results and of course, you can!!!

IamwhatIam517
IamwhatIam5173 stone in reply to Racheller

Thats exactly how I feel! I'm glad it's not just me. Thank you

Alisonjb
Alisonjb2020 September

Bloody well done for losing the weight keep going you are doing great - I know how you feel but in a different why! I know I need to lose about a stone and a half but haven’t had the confidence to go out on my own for a walk/run but I have taken the plunge and started the C25k yesterday for my first day - everyone on here seems so supportive and lots of encouraging words

IamwhatIam517
IamwhatIam5173 stone in reply to Alisonjb

Thank you, this forum is amazing for support. Good luck for your C25k 😀

Alisonjb
Alisonjb2020 September in reply to IamwhatIam517

Thank you 😊

BridgeGirl
BridgeGirlAdministrator in reply to Alisonjb

Hello and welcome to the forum, Alisonjb :)

You'll find everything you need to make the most of the forum in Pinned Posts healthunlocked.com/nhsweigh... , starting with Welcome Newbies. I recommend joining a weekly weigh in on the day of your choice, and using the Daily Diary where members share their meal and exercise plans.

Active participation pays off so I hope we'll see you out and about around the forum :)

jd65
jd652 stone

I set my first goal at getting my BMI under 40 as that was the number quoted in the beginning as having an increased risk. I know exactly how you feel but we are getting healthier and decreasing that risk. 35lb is an amazing loss and you should be very proud.

IamwhatIam517
IamwhatIam5173 stone in reply to jd65

Thank you very much. Im looking forward to getting healthier x

I know what you mean, I havent told anyone at work either, only a couple of select family members and friends. Friends who know have said they can see my loss in my face but i can feel it in other areas they dont mention and no-one at work has said anything. A couple of parents (i work in a school) have noticed and complimented me too, again only seeing it off my face.

As much as this is lovely it bothers me that they cant tell I've lost 6" off my waist but then i also dont want them to know I'm deliberately losing weight. Funny buggers arent we 😁

My motivation is coming from the change is my eating habits, enjoying what i'm eating and watching the kgs drop off. I know one day everyone will notice what i've lost and by then i probably wont care anyway lol.

Keep doing what you're doing and post here whenever you need a bit of oomph and support.

Well done on your great loss so far xx

IamwhatIam517
IamwhatIam5173 stone in reply to springersrule

We're kindred spirits 😁 thank you x

Shouldn’t we just advise you to stop putting all the effort in and return to your old habits, so that you can go and do the opposite? 😉

Seriously, though, when a certain subject is sensitive, then our responses can be very strong.. Sometimes it’s difficult to figure those responses out, even for ourselves. We don’t want people to notice but when they don’t - we are somehow upset. We want people to acknowledge our achievement, and then we get upset when they do... It can be so complicated. Wrong tone, wrong time, wrong person, wrong word...

On the other hand, what really matters is your health, your choices, your journey. You know and we know that you already achieved a lot and that you are now in a better place already. Thank you for sharing 🙏

IamwhatIam517
IamwhatIam5173 stone in reply to N-o-r-d-i

Thank you for your reply. I couldn't figure out myself what the problem was, all these replies have really helped

BJ2020
BJ20205 stone

The only person/thing you can control is yourself. Carry on doing what you are doing. Whether you want to tell people your losing weight is up to you. You can't control covid, just follow the rules the best you can. Flu season is coming up so number might not be accurate. More cases but not many deaths.

PS I don't have TV. Haven't had one for over a year.

IamwhatIam517
IamwhatIam5173 stone in reply to BJ2020

Very true, thank you very much x

venusofthenorth
venusofthenorth2020 September

Look. Losing weight, maintaining weight and staying healthy on your terms has a lot more to it than pleasing people. Whether we weigh as we should or appear as we should we have a life ahead of us and from this point onward weight and appearance will grow worse as we age. We need to make peace with the fact that people will simply never look good enough for anybody and that there's more to life than keeping up appearances. With or without your weight, there's still a decent probability of you surviving COVID should you contract the virus and even then there's just a small risk of that happening given you're doing everything you can to follow your regional regulations. Calm down, keep people off your goddamn case and realize you're doing the best you can for yourself and the things that matter to you.

IamwhatIam517
IamwhatIam5173 stone in reply to venusofthenorth

Thank you 😊

siggie
siggie1st 7lbs

I havent read the replies yet but felt compelled to write, apologies if I am repeating others😉

Why are you hiding your rather superb weight loss under baggy clothes and then wondering why no one has noticed?

If you wear clothes that fit the body you HAVE rather than the body you HAD, then people will notice and rather than give unwanted 'advice' will * hopefully * give compliments, therefore giving you the confidence and motivation to continue doing the fabulous job you've been doing so far.

As my mum once said " if you can't disguise it, decorate it"😊

I hope my reply doesn't offend, my apologies if it does, but I truly feel that your success should be celebrated and not hidden away 😊

Take care🙂

IamwhatIam517
IamwhatIam5173 stone in reply to siggie

Not offensive at all. Thank you for your reply. Love your Mum's saying hahaha

Sixoftwelfe
Sixoftwelfe2020 September

You’re absolutely amazing and I can relate to your feelings. Someone who’s not living your life and thoughts telling you how you should feel - in that case after experiencing fear??

You just want to healthy - why drag fear into this? You want to be happy being able to life in a healthy way - there’s no fear in it! It’s joy and positivity! We’re not living to survive CoVid but we’re living to enrich our lives and the those of people around us. The goals are so positive and forward looking.

Let no-one drag you down mate!!!! Xx

moreless
morelessAdministrator in reply to Sixoftwelfe

Hi and welcome, Sixoftwelfe and venusofthenorth :)

All of the information you need about the forum can be found in Pinned Posts

healthunlocked.com/nhsweigh... and I hope you'll be joining all the Events, Challenges and Clubs that we run, especially a weigh-in and the daily diary.

If you haven't already taken it, here's a tour of the forum healthunlocked.com/?tour=true

We've found active participation to be key to successful weight loss and, of course, it's a good way to get to know people, find inspiration and share support and encouragement.

Wishing you all the best :)

IamwhatIam517
IamwhatIam5173 stone in reply to Sixoftwelfe

Thank you so much, this made me smile 😃

TheAwfulToad
TheAwfulToadMaintainer

Your post reminds me of my mum :) She also takes a "stuff you" attitude to other people's advice. It's not really a good approach to life, but it's pretty hard to change your habits.

As far as COVID-19 goes, it's worth pointing out that obesity is not a risk factor as such. It's more that people who are obese are invariably ill in other ways. That is, people with COVID-19 end up in the ER not because they're fat, but because they're (pre-)diabetic, inactive, and have heart disease. Witness Boris Johnson, for example ...

A prerequisite for weight loss is (a) eating healthy food which (b) leads to reversal of Metabolic Syndrome. That reversal happens long before you become slim. So the fact that you're are successfully losing weight means that you're probably not in that high-risk category.

Also worth pointing out that incidence of COVID-19 is a lot rarer than the media/gov't would have you believe (depends a lot on where you live). My niece is a doctor working in a busy hospital, and she says she's not even heard of one case turning up in critical care.

IamwhatIam517
IamwhatIam5173 stone in reply to TheAwfulToad

Thank you so much, this helped a lot x

Hidden
Hidden

I think the number of people that have been tested positive for The Virus is only the tip of the iceberg compared to the people got it or who had it.

Am a 100% convinced that me and my children have had it, especially since I been talking with some other expat's in Cambodia who have described exactly symptoms as I have had and thought they weren't going to make it through the night...

There has been non stop talking about who are the most vulnerable people that are most likely to die from the virus for the past six months, one of them been people who are overweight/obese.

If you still got a 140lbs to lose then consecrate on that and take all the necessary steps to reduce the risk of contracting the disease.

IamwhatIam517
IamwhatIam5173 stone in reply to Hidden

Thank you for your reply x

I feel for you. You have lost an amazing amount. A fantastic achievement and hold on to that. I weighed 97 kg when I started. Most people, apart from my husband, didn't notice until I had got to about 70kg!! But in terms of COVID, it is a worry but one thing to remember is that your cardio vascular health is important and so regardless of your current weight if you can manage to do some walking etc. that will help your risk and hopefully make you feel better too.

IamwhatIam517
IamwhatIam5173 stone in reply to Annafrances

Thank you very much, I'm walking for 40 minutes, 5 times a week x

Annafrances
Annafrances35kg in reply to IamwhatIam517

That is brilliant and far better than many people of any weight manage!

IamwhatIam517
IamwhatIam5173 stone in reply to Annafrances

Thanks. I'm lucky that I live close enough to work that I can walk. Not willing to risk the bus at the moment

Sammy-Lou
Sammy-Lou2019 November

You are going amazing I am what I am 517! Sorry you are worrying bout catching the virus! Yes I agree try not to watch too much on news - we had a few days off news and it was good for us! Good luck and positive vibes !

IamwhatIam517
IamwhatIam5173 stone in reply to Sammy-Lou

I think I need to go back to not watching it lol thank you x

Yesterday I congratulated you on losing 10% of your body weight. You are doing brilliantly. It sounds as though your colleague was really trying to help you because she cares about you. Sometimes that can be extra pressure because it makes you feel you are doing this for other people. But you are not. You are doing this for you. For your health, your joints, your lifestyle.

Keep doing this for you. Lower risk of Dying from Covid-19 is just one of many wonderful benefits we can all look forward to. 🙃

IamwhatIam517
IamwhatIam5173 stone in reply to DizzeeB

Thank you so much for all your support x

Be proud . 35lb loss is an amazing achievement . That alone has taken guts and will power. If you social distance , wear a mask ..the obvious then you are protected as much as anyone else . These are weird times . I go out only with close trusted friends , shop less , exercise via You Tube instead of 3x in the gym so I do my bit to keep safe. These gov figures don't read good but if you break them down some were ill anyway . You are doing fantastic .Not many of us have lost 35lb ...in fact a few tips please.

IamwhatIam517
IamwhatIam5173 stone in reply to focused1

Thank you very much x

Sarah-Phim
Sarah-Phim3 stone

Hey, I totally feel you, my anxiety around Covid has been awful at times. At the beginning I was running movies in my head of me dying alone in hospital. I’ve cried, been so lonely and generally driven myself mad with thinking about it. I’ve also these last few days been waiting on test results for my 7 year old who has had a cough. Fortunately I got them this morning and is negative. I eventually had to stop reading stuff about Covid, came away from social media and news as they are just pretty much a list of bad things that happen. I started to accept the things I can change and the things I can’t. So I can look after my own hygiene etc, I can eat right to reduce my weight and my risks should I contract Covid. I can’t change that there is a pandemic. But when it gets hard I tell myself “I am safe and well and this will pass”. Because it will in time. I think your works friend’s comment hurt because it’s the truth and you know that. We all feel pain at being overweight in some shape or form. We wouldn’t be overweight if some pain somewhere didn’t need soothing with food. But I agree with others, start celebrating your weight loss. Buy some smaller clothes and show it. You have done great! When you start feeling proud of it people will notice. I’ve lost 2 stone 9 in total and the people that noticed most where those I didn’t see every day. I cut my long hair shorter, bought smaller sized clothes and my attitude became more upbeat. You can do it and are doing it well. So chin up, be proud and look here how many people are behind you and proud of you and cheering you on. 💜

IamwhatIam517
IamwhatIam5173 stone in reply to Sarah-Phim

I'm so glad the test came back negative! Massive well done on your own weight loss. Thank you for you relpy x

Ohhh, sometimes there is just too much news! Especially as statistically bed is the worst place cos more people die in bed than anywhere else. 🤪. Keep on going. Don’t be freaked, stay safe and be sensible and be ‘you are what you are’ and you sound lovely to me! When we are dead and gone far far better to have been a lovely plump person than a nasty person of any size! Be encouraged 😊

IamwhatIam517
IamwhatIam5173 stone in reply to Scaffie

Thank you 😊 x

It’s so good to have this forum to let out all your thoughts and worries anonymously because “a problem shared is a problem halved” - well, not quite but it really helps.

You have done so well so far and with support from all the great folks on here you will find the energy to keep going.

You matter so much to all of us and we are all cheering you on in our own little ways.

Good luck and I hope you can feel the good vibes sent from here.

👵🏻😊

IamwhatIam517
IamwhatIam5173 stone in reply to Sewneat

Thank you 😊 💓 ☺ x

You did the right thing coming here and putting it out of your mind. The "2 stone" badge on your avatar tells me that yes, you can do it. ;)

Not only you can do it, but you are managing to do it in the middle of a pandemic, when everybody is doing everything but avoiding emotional eating.

Try not to worry about what others think about your weight ok? I know it's almost impossible and can be even depressing, but you have to do it for YOURSELF, not for them. It's YOUR health that is on the table, not theirs.

Have a lovely day.

IamwhatIam517
IamwhatIam5173 stone in reply to zinza

You're absolutely correct, thank you x

Green_Days
Green_Days2020 September

Hi lovely if you really do have another 10 stone to lose please put that to the back of your head for now. Concentrate on the here and now. You’ve lost 35lbs up to present date. That is one great achievement !!!! Slow and steady wins the race ...both with dieting and exercise ( I’m also in the C25K group). For now be proud of chipping away those pounds ....good luck xx

TheTabbyCat
TheTabbyCatAdministrator in reply to Green_Days

Welcome to this amazing forum. I suggest you spend some time clicking about to find your way around. It's easier if you have a lap-top as there are several threads. If you’re using another device I strongly suggest that you use the web page as opposed to the app at least until you know your way around.

Have a good read of the pinned post “Welcome Newbies” and follow every thread.

Here’s the link to the pinned posts, healthunlocked.com/nhsweigh...

Here’s the link for the “Tour” of the forum. If you haven’t already taken it.

healthunlocked.com/?tour=true

I strongly suggest you read and contribute to the Daily Diary and participate in a Weekly Weigh in.

You will find there's loads of tips about better eating, from other members. Sharing your daily menu not only helps you stay committed, it can help other members too.

Good luck I hope to "see " you around. Xx

IamwhatIam517
IamwhatIam5173 stone in reply to Green_Days

Thank you very much. Good luck with your C25K X

Hidden
Hidden

Hi, it sounds as if your self esteem is low and you could benefit from some professional help.

I suffered terribly all my life with not feeling good enough and after my last relationship I was emotionally finished. He made me feel like O was worthless.

My son saw how low I was and I agreed to reach out. I found an online support group through my local council who offer cognitive behavioural therapy for depression which is what low self esteem is.

I took an online course due to Covid 19 which lasted 6 weeks and along with loads of reading and online video blogs I trained my thought pattern. That was 6 months ago now and I am continuing on my journey. I have lost weight but shill have a way to go. It's a long journey to happiness but you have made the first move by reaching out here. Maybe you could make enquiries and see if there is a similar course run by your local authority? Good luck and stop reading about Corona virus, it's scary yes, but by successfully losing this weight you have your gloves on and are showing the virus that if it dares to threaten you, you're ready to beat it!

IamwhatIam517
IamwhatIam5173 stone in reply to Hidden

Thank you. Ive had 2 bouts of CBT in the past and it worked brilliantly. I'll have a look to see if there are online ones I can do

Hi IamwhatIam,

You've had some lovely motivational and supportive replies already, and I can't add to it really, I just wanted to say to you:

Please don't be hard on yourself, because you have done wonderfully well, losing 35 pounds, that's a lot of weight to lose...you must be feel better for it x

Why don't you wear some of your colourful, less loose, clothing...to help you feel a little brighter in yourself, and, quietly celebrate your weight loss...you don't need praise from others..if and when you do get that attention, you will possibly find that you don't want it, it might make you feel a little uneasy (it would me).

Keep doing what you're doing, and keep losing the weight, for you! You are going to feel amazing very soon:) x

IamwhatIam517
IamwhatIam5173 stone in reply to Shield-Maiden

Thank you. I'm waiting to earn some lovely new clothes. New clothes is one of my rewards along my journey. My clothes are looser but still fit, I like to shrink out of my clothes lol

Shield-Maiden
Shield-Maiden2 stone in reply to IamwhatIam517

That sounds like a good plan :)

Anniejam
Anniejam2020 July

Focus on you for you! You are enough...which is easier said then done I know. I’ve recently lost 4 and half stone since November. All those baggy clothes donate them. Go and buy yourself a couple of nice outfits. Be proud of what you have achieved. When people ask what have you done...just reply hard work and exercise. There’s no magic shake, no magic formula as we know. Since November exercise has become a habit now, if I don’t do something..even if it’s just some stretching I miss it. If you’d had asked me that a few months ago I would have never believed it. People who have never carried weight never understand how it scrapes away at your life day by day in all sorts of ways. Your confidence, your perception of yourself and what others think. It will probably never leave us if I’m being honest. But it’s how to TRY and control it when it comes in waves. If I feel a bit un-motivated I listen to something on YouTube to get me going. They is so many to choose. Find what works for YOU..good luck on your journey and remember it’s all new beginnings and it’s exciting out there if we allow ourselves to own it. 💕

IamwhatIam517
IamwhatIam5173 stone in reply to Anniejam

This nearly made me cry. Thank you very much x

Shield-Maiden
Shield-Maiden2 stone in reply to Anniejam

A lovely post Annie x

And congrats on your amazing weight loss too :)

Aginghippy
Aginghippy2020 August

Get some more clothes, just a few and get used to wearing them. Don't get too many because you will some even smaller ones soon❣ I expect some have noticed but don't want to say the wrong thing.

I understand your feelings, not only am I over weight but I'm over 70 !!!

Carry on as you are. You are doing it for yourself, enjoy your new clothes and stop watching the news. You've got lots of support here. X

IamwhatIam517
IamwhatIam5173 stone in reply to Aginghippy

Thank you so much for the support and advice x

c_ralu
c_raluVisitor

Hi darling,

This is a purely psychological issue so talking about concrete stuff doesnt help that much but anywa ill try.

1.depending on your psychology,you might nerd concrete proofs. The easiest way to measure inflamation is to do the test sensitive CRP. You just go to a walk in lab and do it. Its a nice way to keep progress.

2. Inflamation depends on the state of microbiome and they know for sure that shifts in less than a month.i dont think its the weight but the ratio of bacterias that love fruits and vegetables versus the ones that like saturated fat.

Im not going to tell you to not be scared and that you are doing a great job because that might not help.you have to practice giving up thoughts.its like when you hold a ball in your hand and then you drop it.you have to drop it repeatedly until you dont need to pick it up. With me meditation helpped as i think and then think mantra and that means dropping the thought.

As for losing weight,if one has a feelong that they dont want people to notice,that will influence their psychology to not notice or mention.

Its a matter of mental gymnastic.dont forget,these thoughts have no logic so they will try to seduce you.the work is give up the thought once you noticed you picked it up.meditation is the most helpful but you can also say:"ill do one nice thing for myself when i think shit for myself". Its not self esteem its just a complex that gets activated.

Well done

TheTabbyCat
TheTabbyCatAdministrator in reply to c_ralu

Hi c_ralu and welcome to the weight loss forum. Thank you for your support. I see tthat you're a member of another HU forum so I'm assuming you're just visiting us. Please let us know if you're a visitor or would like to become a member. Either way you're very welcome.

IamwhatIam517
IamwhatIam5173 stone in reply to c_ralu

I never thought of meditation, I'll give it a try. Many thanks for the reply x

Peacheabeau
Peacheabeau2020 August

Hi there, so sorry to hear you are feeling this way. Any weight loss is a great achievement and 2 stone is fantastic and well worth it for our health, do keep that in mind. As part of your weight loss regime eating a more healthy diet will certainly help fight this virus. I take a Vit. D supplement to boost my immune system(which I was complimented on by the Pharmacist who was giving me my Pneumonia Vaccination) Also if you qualify for any Vaccinations to prevent other infections, grab them. I'm having my flu jab in October.

What you have achieved so far will certainly help you .

I hope this is helpful.

Kind regards Lynda.

IamwhatIam517
IamwhatIam5173 stone in reply to Peacheabeau

Thank you, I also take a daily vitamin D supplement. Yes I'll be getting the flu jab through work 🙃

BrynGlas
BrynGlas2020 January

Kick those nasties into touch because if you have lost 35 lbs you are doing it very well and I would be very surprised if no one has noticed yet.

I am thinking this is a confidence issue??? I am not going to tell you to tell the world, but I am wondering why you don't want to tell the world. Are you worried that it might all come back again, or something like that?

I think that if I was in your shoes, I would buy a smart outfit for work in a smaller size and just turn up in it! You deserve a treat because you have lost a lot of weight yourself, you put the work in and why not tell the world about it?

Now that you are aware of the fact that you can lose weight, you know that you are in control and can finish the job. If you have a hiccup, forget it and start again, but I don't think you will personally have too many hiccups now that the weight is moving, hang on in there, but allow yourself a little reward which can only increase your confidence.

It's funny but I want to say to you that the only way is UP! Weight going down, confidence though, has to be going UP!!! Well done you.

IamwhatIam517
IamwhatIam5173 stone in reply to BrynGlas

Thank you for the lovely reply. Its more the issue that I've yo yoed for years and people are used to me losing a bit then gaining it all back. I find I'm more focused when no one knows. I have so much to lose I find that if people compliment me after a small amount I lose some of the drive to keep going. I have glorious clothes in smaller sizes and one of my rewards is so try them all on and throw out my current stuff.

BrynGlas
BrynGlas2020 January in reply to IamwhatIam517

Well, I can identify with the clothes in smaller sizes! I used to have everything from size 12 up to size 22 somewhere or other in the house, so I know where you are coming from. I cried my eyes out when, after losing 3 stones, I could fit into my size 12's again!! My husband found it very strange, but I was so thrilled that I could fit into clothes that I had kept for years in hopes of getting into them.

Go mad and try a few things on, when you feel like it, it may give you a boost, even if you don't wear them outside the house!

I am sure that you will get there, you have the will and know how you can control it now, after all. Good luck with it, we have every faith in you.

IamwhatIam517
IamwhatIam5173 stone in reply to BrynGlas

The thought of that day when I can try on my old clothes is a huge motivation for me.

BrynGlas
BrynGlas2020 January in reply to IamwhatIam517

I can tell you that you will be as thrilled as I was, I'm certain. Keep it in mind, because I am sure you will get there. You have done so well you know, you really have. But sooner or later everyone will notice that you have lost a lot of weight, it might be worth thinking about how you could cope with it then? I am sure no one will be anything other than supportive to you. It might be nice to dream about their jaw dropping open as you walk into your work place or wherever, dressed to the nines! LOL I hope when that day comes you will let us know about it, we would be thrilled to hear of it you know.

Keep smiling and confident, because you are in control these days and you know it, after all. Sending hugs to you

IamwhatIam517
IamwhatIam5173 stone in reply to BrynGlas

Of course I'll be letting you know 🙂

BrynGlas
BrynGlas2020 January in reply to IamwhatIam517

I missed this message! Gggrrr, sorry! That is really something to look forward to and I totally understand it as you know. You have a whole new life in front of you, aim high. Xx

katieoxo60
katieoxo602020 July

Well now you got it out of your head are you not pleased with your weight loss ? I would be. People are saying anything to explain away the deaths from the viruses. Sadly being overweight is being blamed for everything these days. in many illness cases it does not help being overweightbut even small amounts lost reduce things like blood sugar levels, uric acids, arthritic joint pain, cholestral, heart risks ect. So you have improved your health massively by losing 35lbs which is 2and a half stone after all. Well done a level weight is just as important if you find it difficult to lose large amounts or cannot risk too much loss at once due to other health issues. Take the necessary precautions for the virus and I am sure you will stay well. Enjoy the coming weekend.

IamwhatIam517
IamwhatIam5173 stone in reply to katieoxo60

Thank you very much for your reply x

Honey719
Honey719Restart Sept 2020

Please take time and be kind to yourself. Its difficult when you are trying to address your issues and take control of your life and those around you say things inadvertently, that have a massive impact of which they are not aware.

You are already doing something wonderful for yourself and you are already reaping the benefits. Keep doing what you are doing. You are doing a great job.

Stay focused on your needs.

IamwhatIam517
IamwhatIam5173 stone in reply to Honey719

Thank you so much. I know she didn't mean any harm x

TheTabbyCat
TheTabbyCatAdministrator in reply to Honey719

Hi Honey719 and welcome back to this amazing forum, as some things have changed since you were last here, I suggest you spend some time clicking about to find your way around. It's easier if you have a lap-top as there are several threads. If you’re using another device I strongly suggest that you use the web page as opposed to the app at least until you know your way around.

Have a good read of the pinned post “Welcome Newbies” and follow every thread.

Here’s the link to the pinned posts, healthunlocked.com/nhsweigh...

Here’s the link for the “Tour” of the forum. If you haven’t already taken it.

healthunlocked.com/?tour=true

I strongly suggest you read and contribute to the Daily Diary and participate in a Weekly Weigh in.

You will find there's loads of tips about better eating, from other members. Sharing your daily menu not only helps you stay committed, it can help other members too.

Good luck I hope to "see " you around. 🍀

Babyc69
Babyc692020 September

You have done amazingly well to have lost that amount of weight. Some people don't realise the impact of the words they speak. Those same people see you every day so won't notice the difference in your weight, it's always those that haven't seen you for a while that notice. The main thing is that you are doing this for you, not those around you. Stay positive! You've got this!

IamwhatIam517
IamwhatIam5173 stone in reply to Babyc69

So true, thank you x

Sometimes people don’t like to say anything about weight loss in case it offends, even though they’ve noticed.

I’m sure there are a number of us on here who feel just like you.

You’re doing really well. You must be so proud of yourself.

Well done 👍

IamwhatIam517
IamwhatIam5173 stone in reply to Cockneyblue

Thank you 😊

Snubby
Snubby2020 October

Bless you ,you have done so well ,,do it half a stone at a time don’t look at too big a picture ,maybe ,,,perhaps the lady meant to say ,,” you have done so well so far ,,keep going “” ,who knows ,,,hard but it so easy for someone’s remark to spoil the diet ,,remember this is for you too get healthier ,,maybe treat yourself to some smaller clothes ,,😉😉

IamwhatIam517
IamwhatIam5173 stone in reply to Snubby

Thank you

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