I'm FAT!!!!!: I turned 48 last sunday. I... - Weight Loss Support

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I'm FAT!!!!!

SGSDoom profile image
38 Replies

I turned 48 last sunday. I have too amazing children. I weight as of today 23.4 3/4 stone. I just dont know what to do.I mostly eat healthy. I do like my alcohol but not every day. I have tried Keto but cant keep it up. I get sick of meat. I am giving up hope.

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SGSDoom profile image
SGSDoom
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38 Replies
SofaJockey profile image
SofaJockey

I used a much more gentle LCHF (Low Carb High Fat) diet to come down from c.20 stone.

I know some people get great results from keto, but it's too aggressive for my taste, I'd rather follow an enjoyable plan that fills me up and means I lose weight slowly but pleasantly. But that's me, there are many roads that can be followed.

There is absolutely hope in the pages of this forum.

I'm sure others will pop along with other links and thoughts.

Importantly, now you have taken the huge step of posting, keep interacting and use the ideas shared to help you find not only hope but more health.

SGSDoom profile image
SGSDoom in reply toSofaJockey

thank you

Give up sugar for a month & see where that gets you...

SGSDoom profile image
SGSDoom in reply to

I dont tend to have suger or milk in anything. But apart from alcohol three times a week. Friday saturday and Thursday.

in reply toSGSDoom

Do you eat any foods with sugar in them? Cake, biscuits. Ice cream, jars of sauces, breakfast cereals, tropical fruits, dried fruit like raisins?

SofaJockey profile image
SofaJockey in reply toSGSDoom

As I understand it, the bigger issue with alcohol is not that is has some calories (which is no worse than a light breakfast), but that drinking it eases personal control over snacks as inhibitions go out of the window.

A good tip is that if you do have some alcohol (a fair choice) make sure you have, er, locked any snacks away. ☺️

Cinnamonswirl66 profile image
Cinnamonswirl66 in reply toSGSDoom

Which alcohol do you drink and how much of it? You could try cutting alcohol down to once a week or just drinking low calorie alcohol. Some alcohol has lots of calories and drinking can make you feel hungry in itself.

I still need to lose weight but the mystery key for me was recognising foods I thought were lower in carbs were too high. Grains were upsetting my gut expanding my waistline and making stomach bloat. I found out I was intolerant to dairy and egg rice and maize as well as wheat barley and rye. I had to change my diet to exclude all the foods I loved. No more bread and cakes biscuits. I had to think of watery foods with no stodge in them. For a curry I would make a sauce with curry powder and all the other ingredients, but avoid flour to thicken it.

I put the curry with sauce on top of broccoli instead of rice. I hunted for flours to make sausage rolls but to find anything without additives of gluten or rice flour was a problem.

However it is no problem I can still eat steak and chips with mushrooms tomatoes and a bowl ofstrawberrries if I'm going out. Favourites like prawn Rose Marie I ask for prawns without mayonnaise and sauces on salad. Cutting out most grains, has helped me lose a couple of stone and more, and feel better for it. Am sure you will find the right diet for you. Removing low calorie squashes and fizzy drinks with sweeteners may help too as many have a sweetener which turns to sugar in your liver and is stored as fat.

IndigoBlue61 profile image
IndigoBlue61

Hello and Welcome to the Weight Loss Forum SGSDoom

You’ve had some good responses already, and I agree with them that you need to find a sensible and sustainable way of eating that you can follow long term. It’s about making a choice, what do you want more, the food that tempts you, the weekend drinking, or to lose weight and feel better.

If you haven’t already then please read the Pinned Posts here healthunlocked.com/nhsweigh... Please read it carefully so you can find all the information you need to find your way around. This is a very chatty and friendly place so take some time to read all the posts and information

As a peer to peer support group we rely on mutual encouragement, and nothing beats joining in, reading posts and replying to others. Our Group Weigh-in and the Daily Diary are probably the best places to start

Best wishes in your weight loss journey

Indigo 😊

Hopalong1 profile image
Hopalong1Host3 stone

Hello SGSDoom , A year ago this week I was 20st 9lb. I had tried everything going WW, SW, Rosemary Conley. Becoming poorly with being so heavy. I cut out booze, chocolate, crisps, red coke for a few weeks, but at this point I started going on the Daily Diary and members helped me cut down bread and potatoes. The way they ate helped shape my eating. I try and get on the DD every day because it makes me stronger. I have had bad weeks, but just keep trying. I really wish you all the best with your weight loss journey :)

Linda_71 profile image
Linda_71

Hi I turned 49 on Saturday , I’m obese have around ten stone to lose annoying am paying for WW BUT not attending class .. with two step kids to a guy that doesn’t really want me around anymore all because my insecurities over being fat and ugly made me jealous and impossible over the last few years.... so I understand ... I’m scared I’m getting older and more unhealthy ... good luck to you ... maybe keep tabs on here as to how each other is doing ... I’m still waiting for a miracle that I know can’t happen. 🙃

lucigret profile image
lucigret in reply toLinda_71

Hello and Welcome Linda_71

You are right there is no miracle, but you can change things, honestly :)

Take a look at this success story,

healthunlocked.com/nhsweigh...

Read all of the links included in it. Maybe it's time for a change and maybe this could be it :)

If you haven't already, then take a read of the Newbie Welcome to help you to navigate the forum, whilst in Pinned Posts have a look at everything else we have to offer.

healthunlocked.com/nhsweigh...

We are here 7 days a week, 24 hours a day, we are very supportive and we cost nothing. We won't try to sell you ready made meals and won't talk about a point system either. All we will ask you to do, is to take the time to read the information in the link above. Once you have done that, as participation is key to success, we would suggest that you join in with the Daily Diary and join a weigh in day - links to both can be found in Pinned Posts.

These are the bare minimum to join in with, I am sure you will be able to find other challenges and clubs to join as well.

We can only support you, if you become an active member. I would suggest joining in with today's weigh in group, Wednesday Wobble Warriors, they are a supportive lot and would love to have you as a member of their group.

Please be kind to yourself, don't call your self fat and ugly, I don't think that is a way you would respond to others here, so treat yourself they way you would treat us. Don't underestimate the amount of help you will give yourself by supporting others here either. As we reply to others, with kind words and suggestions, they rub off on us too.

You can turn your life around and make home life happier, by trying to change your mind set to a more positive out look. Take the time to read all of the information you can on here and whilst doing that, make some small changes to your eating. Accept that this will be a long journey, but try and think of it as an adventure, as you learn new skills and look forward to eating healthy foods and using new recipes, also making a lot of virtual new friends :)

Wishing you lots of luck on your new journey :)

trebl3 profile image
trebl3 in reply tolucigret

such lovely words and full of encouragement 😗❤

lucigret profile image
lucigret in reply totrebl3

Thank you trebl3, I try :)

Twenty2go profile image
Twenty2go in reply tolucigret

Just needed to say that your post personifies the' mantra' of our administrators and the members of the forum. Caring with practical information.

lucigret profile image
lucigret in reply toTwenty2go

That's really kind of you, thank you :)

Tiggerr profile image
Tiggerr

Welcome SGSDoom :) Lots of good advice already.

Hopalong has mentioned the Daily Diary and here's today's one... healthunlocked.com/nhsweigh... it's helpful for getting into an eating routine and for receiving regular constructive feedback. I'm always impressed at how much more there is still to learn.

As SofaJockey has mentioned, it's possible to follow a more relaxed approach to lchf. I've been following lchf since the new year and I wouldn't class my meals as particularly overloaded with meat. I get much of my fat from dairy, fish, nuts, avocados, good oils etc...

Good luck! :)

Zaq12wsx profile image
Zaq12wsxMaintainer

I’ll be brief...

I’ve gone down from 16 stone to 11 stone in eleven months.

This has purely been through a healthy balanced diet, realistic portion sizes, daily exercise (brisk walking half an hour a day, swimming once a week) and determination. I’ve now recently completed Couch to 5k as well.

I recommend that you don’t do slimming clubs, fad diets or pills and potions. See your GP and grab any help and support they can offer.

Don’t begin anything (food or diet) that you cannot maintain for the rest of your life.

I firmly believe that this is a lifestyle thing.

Find your main motivation, YOU!

Sixteen months of being at goal weight, and loving life!

I wish you the best of luck!

toomuchwool profile image
toomuchwool6lbs

Good morning SGSDoom. Perhaps it is not so much what you are eating but how much? Check out your portion sizes. I discovered that I was eating as much as my husband who has a much bigger frame than me! Hence, I was overweight and he was within normal weight guidelines. Count the calories and use smaller plates, eat slowly. They all help,trust me!

Good luck and don't despair. Lots of help on this forum!

rosemel64 profile image
rosemel64

Excellent advice!

welcome2020 profile image
welcome2020

Have you Tried the keto diet at the moment I am on the keto diet and it is working for me it’s amazing what you can eat . I have lost a stone and 3 lb in weight up to now look at up on the Internet.

Annekelly58 profile image
Annekelly58

So am I...fat, but joining this group means you're getting into the right frame of mind to lose weight. Well done. It's so hard. I was not far short of your weight at one point, so I know where you're coming from. For what it's worth, here's my strategy. Half meat, double veg and significantly reduce carbs. Make big pans of veg soup that can be heated in-between meals when you are peckish....4 mins in microwave...no bread, or 30g porridge with milk, 2 mins in microwave. What you don't buy you can't eat or drink, so don't buy things that will tempt you. Good luck with it. Don't despair, even a couple of pounds makes a difference to the way you feel about yourself.

karen50plus profile image
karen50plus

Would you mind expanding on what you eat that is “healthy “? And how much you eat ? . I ve found that many of these so called “ healthy” stuff is anything but . Do you cook from fresh rather than buy ready meals ? Do you drink diet pop ? I ve lost 4&1/2 stone by changing the way I eat but not “ dieting “ . Dieting means at some point you go back to “ normal eating “ - and that in itself is the problem . I fill half my plate with vegetables , a quarter with meat and the remaining quarter with carbs ( potatoes/ rice) .

I ve bought a draw full of spices and some decent cookbooks and I plan the meals I m going to cook for the week to come . I don’t buy biscuits or chocolate or I will eat it 😱. And I munch on carrot sticks or fruit between meals . It’s not a quick fix . It’s a change of eating habits . My biggest problem is that there is a LOT of food I don’t like but if you like a big variety of food it will be easier for you ( I can’t do broccoli or cauliflower 🤢) . Also , get a diary you can hide away and write down EVERYTHING you eat every day . Get a measure tape and measure yourself . You won’t like what you see in the beginning , but as the weeks go in and the inches get smaller , you will begin to feel more positive about yourself . If I m home lunch time I have a proper meal not just a sandwich . I often keep a portion of what I ve made the night before to heat up the following day , or double all the ingredients so I make 2 lots of food and freeze one lot for a day I don’t feel like cooking 🤷‍♀️.

And I started walking . My husband bought me a Fitbit ( at my request, he wasn’t being mean ) for my birthday and it made me realise how much I wasn’t moving . In the beginning I was lucky if I would do 4,000 steps a day . Now 10,000 steps seems to be the norm and sometimes as much as 18,000. The fit bit is expensive and it’s a waste of money if you don’t use it . Walking doesn’t have to be gruelling . Walking around the shops is still walking . But if you can get out and about every day it will make a difference. Borrow a friend/ neighbours dog 🐕. Apologies for the long message I didn’t realise I could waffle on so much . 😳😱🙈

Good luck ☺️

lucigret profile image
lucigret in reply tokaren50plus

A great reply karen :)

Well done on your weight loss.

If you haven't already, please read our Newbie Welcome in Pinned Posts and whilst in Pinned Posts, see what else we have on offer that you might like to join in with.

healthunlocked.com/nhsweigh...

Thank you for offer support and encouragement on this thread and hope that we see you joining in and sharing your story around the forum :)

Edge1234 profile image
Edge1234Visitor

Hi,

There is some fantastic advice you have been given here and there is very little I can add to this. However, I will say be kind to yourself in the first instance. I wonder who told us to dislike ourselves because we got fat? This self-loathing is so destructive and I think we should all stop hating ourselves. You have a lot to love - two fabulous children for a start. I bet they would be really sad to read your message of a mum who doesn’t like herself. Also, it’s a horrible message for them to have about possibly disliking themselves now or at some point in the future lives.

Three easy steps then;

1. Start to feel better about yourself, begin to start to really love what you have achieved in your life so far. Love yourself.

2. Then embark on your weight loss journey with all the fantastic advice you have already been given here plus more advice and support to come through this forum.

3. Drop WW as the £5 subs could be spent on a facial or a nice hair do in a few weeks which is a far better way to spend your money.

...and you will fly...I promise.

Good luck. Love and peace x

Cinnamonswirl66 profile image
Cinnamonswirl66

I rarely eat meat these days and eat much more healthily than I did when I was younger but I'm having to unlearn a lifetime of unhealthy eating patterns. I think we often have an emotional connection to food. Binge or comfort eating when feeling miserable. Craving sugar and carbs just before we're due on a period, rewarding and punishing ourselves with food and diets etc.

I think my biggest need is more exercise. When I've not done exercise in a while I just start by walking 20-30 minutes a day and build it up, plus walking is free and gentle exercise. It should be Spring soon so this will feel easier as it gets warmer.

I also have a second hand Wii Fit which I use to do Yoga. If I do as little as 20 minutes a day on that I lose weight.

It's an uphill struggle but I'm learning to be honest with myself about what and how much I eat. I have smaller portion sizes than I used to and I simply don't buy things that I know I'll eat just for the sake if it, like biscuits, crisps, cake etc. That's not to say I never eat them but I dont actively buy them when I do a food shop. I also limit processed foods and cook more from scratch. I only eat wholemeal bread, brown rice and whole wheat pasta and I at a lot of cous cous and vegetables.

I made some changes when I had high blood pressure. It's still a slight concern but nowhere near as high as it used to be and I take medication to lower it. Work stress also had a lot to do with it but my weight doesn't help. I'm 53 and 17.5 stone.

Baby steps. Start small and congratulate yourself for e everything you manage to do.

Diane2 profile image
Diane2 in reply toCinnamonswirl66

Hello Cinnamonswirl66 and welcome to this Forum!

It sounds as if you havd and significant changes in your eating habits, that's an achievement and it's our food choices that are key in terms of our weight and weight loss.

To our site, please look at the following link to Pinned Posts for info on our Weight Loss Firum and to help you find significant Pages on here...

healthunlocked.com/nhsweigh...

....it can take a bit to master finding one's way so please read the material carefully. There are other links within the Welcome message which show picture guides, info on privacy, FAQs page etc

Please note, don't use the HU App, it is much easier to use the website!

There's a lot there but it's worth taking your time to read, honest!

We recommend that members join a Weekly Weigh-In, on the day of your choice, and also use the Daily Diary, where members share their meal plans and get useful feedback. They are found under Pinned Posts (go back to the link I gave you above)

A special feature of our Forum is the degree of support between members which you will experience (and add to yourself !) as you join in and chat with others.

All the best on your weight-loss journey ! 😊

S11m profile image
S11m

Hi, SGSDoom , welcome.

If you "slim smart" weight loss is not so hard! It is not all about motivation and masochism.

Some of us here find that what works is a combination of The Low Carbohydrate, High-Fat (LCHF) diet (see the forum here on Health Unlocked) and Not Snacking All Day AKA Intermittent Fasting (IF). See:

Newbies IF FAQ:

healthunlocked.com/fasting-...

The Fasting and Furious Forum, here on Health Unlocked:

healthunlocked.com/fasting-...

SGSDoom profile image
SGSDoom

Hi All thank you all for the good advice you are amazing. I couple of replies thought I may be female. Sorry I’m male sorry if I gave that personah. May have been the kids part. But they are the be all and end all to me. I thought maybe the name would have put me in the mail category SGSDoom. I ride a Harley street glide special in black with all blacked out. Just in case you wonder where the name come from. Also a pic of it on my avatar. My friend has just purchased a diet plate (I think that’s what it’s called) for me. I’m just so confused looking at different things in the web. I always thought potatoes were a no go and yet NHS recipes say choose potatoes. I always cook with olive oil. I maybe have a takeaway once a month. Ahhhh it’s so frustrating. I am a big guy and I hold it well. But my frame would say 17/18stone would be perfect. So lots to read. Thank you all for the replies. Best regards Michael

Diane2 profile image
Diane2 in reply toSGSDoom

Hi Michael, do come onto Daily Diary pages, you'll pick up a lot of ideas support and motivation . You dont need to pay SW or WW to help you lose weight. Join a weekly Weigh In page on here(see your Pinned Posts link as you've been sent by Admin and the Daily Diary pages,new one every day. All you have to lose is...your weight (on the plus side) or some time (on the "minus")...do try it out 🤗 !

monday1957 profile image
monday19573kg in reply toSGSDoom

Hi SGSDoom & welcome to this fantastic forum ☺️

Do try and make contact on a daily basis as it may help you to focus and also increase your sense of self-accountability.

Some tiny tips that have worked for me:

Write a daily diary of the food you've consumed the day before.

Wear a Fitbit and track your steps and resting heart rate.

Once a month, get the measuring tape out and log your measurements.

Weigh yourself once a week only.

Don't eat other people's leftovers (when my kids were younger, I couldn't bear seeing any food wasted on their plates, so I often ate it 🤦🏽‍♀️)

Think of your body as an engine, like your motorbike, and make sure you're putting the right fuel in it. 🏍

Walk every day & gradually build up your distance and speed.

Reduce carbs. Don't drink fizzy pop or fruit juice.

Re meat, there are loads of ways of creating filling, tasty vegetarian meals - look on DietDoctor.com for ideas. (I'm biased - I've been vegetarian for 37 years).

Plan your meals and shop with purpose.

After you've eaten your evening meal, brush your teeth & don't eat anything until the morning!

Be kind to yourself.

Cinnamonswirl66 profile image
Cinnamonswirl66 in reply toSGSDoom

Ha!!was it me talking about periods?! 😉🤣🤣

Catfox profile image
Catfox

Slimming World may be a way forward

carbbuster profile image
carbbuster

Hi SGSDoom, Lots of great advice already flying your way and a lot to ponder over. There are two approaches I think, one is to lose weight through denial and strict adherence to a "diet " plan , celebrate the loss then watch in dismay as it returns The other is to learn what is healthy when it come to what goes on your plate or if you are a snacker what bypasses your plate and goes direct to mouth, this is still about diet but in the big sense, what you can live with and do every day as part of your life. You have a family and your lifestyle is likely to become theirs in following your example so think in terms of family healthy eating not just special dad diet eating. I think most if not all of us thought we were eating relatively healthily and that we were not overeating at mealtimes( I will draw a discreet veil over the snacks!!) sadly closer examination proves that not to be the case. Understanding portion sizes really makes a difference and your diet plate will help give you a guide to proportions etc but common sense will tell you that if you batter and deep fry every element on that plate it ain't going to help! The Daily Diary is great there are recipes under topics for meal ideas. If your children are still at home you have ready made exercise mates on the other end of a football , go to the park, take a trip to the swimming pool take a bicycle ride . Or get out the Wii if you have one and take them on in a tournament! Food and drink is great, it should be enjoyable , sociable , we just need to learn how to do that in the best way possible for us. Every one on the forum has different backgrounds, reasons for wanting to improve their weight or relationship with food the forum gives you a community supportive when the day or week is going to hell in a hand basket and encouraging each other to better habits and a long term healthy lifestyle. Easy no, stumbles and hurdles, absolutely but feeling fitter, happier in ourselves , reaching and maintaining an appropriate wight whilst generally becoming healthier are the goals. If that is what you are looking for then you are definitely in the right place, your gender is immaterial .Facials may not be your thing by way of reward then opt for something else. After your weight loss you are going to need new bike leathers and your fantastic motorbike even gives you an added incentive--just think of the fuel economies you will make when that extra weight is gone!! Hope you decide to stick with us and that you find the route that best suits you for where you want to be. All the best.

Twenty2go profile image
Twenty2go

At the moment sat on the settee with some sort of viral infection- blanket, paracetamol and fluids to hand, I really want something 'naughty' to give me that sudden sugar rush. Have had one chocolate and realized it could continue to be many more, so am using the forum today to help distract me. As IndigoBlue61 says use us, we are here to support , offer advice ,maybe cheer you up and possibly laughing with you as we are all on that journey to lose weight along with all the other personal baggage that comes with it.

lucigret profile image
lucigret in reply toTwenty2go

Well done for using distraction techniques :) Hoping you will feel well soon, some horrible viruses about at the moment :)

Craftyperson profile image
Craftyperson

I can see you've had loads of ( good I'm sure) replies so all I'll say is be kind to yourself, set small goals the big picture can be overwhelming, dont think of it as a diet but a healthy eating regime for life and eat healthy home made foods. Good luck oh and join a weighday you will get plenty of support that way.

focused1 profile image
focused1Maintainer13kg

I know how you feel and most people don't feel great if they are' fat' . Fat made me ill and fat made me depressed . There aren't that many happy fat people who are 100% happy ..now I will be bombarded with people who are . I feel better both physically and mentally now I am lighter.

I didn't realise how much I was eating both in terms of portions and junk until I logged all my food into free app Myfitnesspal . I did it with calories but it did make my allowance a bit too low . Maybe cut out even 1 drink and that would be 3 over the days . It is amazing what little tweaks can do. If this is a 'for life ' change then don't call it a diet . Watch things like all table sauces , those odd snacks and try to keep to 3 meals a day . Shop with a list and get your kids to tell you off if you go near the cupboards . They will be so proud of you . My son didn't want to be the big Dad either . He now does park runs which were impossible 6 months ago .

Unsure how old your children are but try to involve them in sport whrther its a pitch and put , kick around or swimming . I am 59 and got on a trampoline with my grandchildren last week . They thought it was funny but I was amazed with myself .

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