Once more into the breach, this time I will succeed.

[Arthrath]

After a promising start I fell by the wayside...ish.

For some reason my other half keeps sabotaging my efforts.

Its hard enough trying to change habits and tastes but impossible if someone sits next to you stuffing their face all evening with nuts and beer, and when its their turn to cook deliberately does not use the carefully prepared oil spray (sitting handily next to the cooker) but pours, what looks like my entire days calorie allowance of, oil into the pan. Being cheered on with comments like 'well I'm not forcing you to put it into your mouth', 'I see no reason why I should change, I'm not the one who is fat' no wonder I have been looking for comfort.

I have concluded that if I am to lose those excess pounds(stones) I will do it inspite of my family and not with their help.

I had set up a calorie counter on my lap top but very rarely can use our single computer when I want to so merrily consumed food (which I enjoyed) only to find that when I could log it I invariably had overshot. One really bad day by more than twice the calories I actually needed.

After seeing the weight come back on and slowly starting to increase I have come back with a new resolve.

I do not want to be type two diabetic, I do not want to struggle up the stairs or be out of breath on a short walk.

Too negative? Your right.

What I DO want is to run up the stair effortlessly.

I want to be able to ride a small horse/pony and not to be restricted by its weight bearing capacity.

I want to feel good in my clothes, not skinny- I am not a stick shape- Too general?

I want to look down and see the top of my panties (its tucked under my tummy at the moment).

I want to run without my ankles acking.

I have come back with a new resolve.

In the first week we are always full of hope and resolve but I have noticed that after a month or so people seem to fall away. Have they reached their goals? I suspect not.

Rather than using my computer and excel to track my calories I am using myfitnesspal. Although it is obviously american it is still usable.

I have done this for a week and find it quite user friendly.

My previous attempt to lose weight was not wasted. I have learned a lot about myself and where the heffalump traps are in my life. I have come to terms with not being able to change others habits around me. Fortunately I have an alternative room to go to when the munching/guzzling becomes too much.

Someone once said that you are most motivated and likely to succeed when the alternative is more painful.

I will be making dinners that I can freeze and label with their calories so that hubby can make his high calorie meals and I can have a night of cooking but have my own meal without undoing a week of effort.

I can not change others only myself.

By posting on this site I am being honest. No hiding. No kidding. No secret eating.

If I have a treat/biscuit, I will enjoy every crumb and put it on my log.

The other thing that that I must accept is that my hobbies are sedentary which means that I have to work in some form of exercise.

I dislike gyms and group sport. I like horse riding and now go once a week.

I go for a half hour walk every day or if the weather is inclement only miss one day.

I WILL be still posting after a month.

[dotty_segs]

Wow! What an interesting post. Venting your frustrations and getting the support on here is exactly what you need to stick to your resolve. I can understand - at the end of the day only we can change ourselves, never mind what others say (or do) whether we can do it or not.

Whilst my husband is supportive of my weight loss journey, he is underweight and I am overweight. Difficult?! Like you, I am determined to make it work eg I have less carbs and he has more.

I shall see you in a months time and beyond on this site - to be sure you (and I!) don't give up and stick with it! Go girl, u can do it! 😊

[Arthrath 7lbs in reply to dotty_segs]

Opps!,

I think I left my reply to you all in the wrong place.

But...

Thank you all so much for your kind words.

I wasn't expecting any replies, just typing into the ether.

You are all very encouraging. I am sure that you will all look at your partners in a new light and with renewed affection. Don't forget to give them a hug.

I have just come back from shopping and the only 'extras' were a bunch of flowers and a hot roast chicken on special which I will make straight into meals and freeze.

I am on a roll!

[Windswept1]

Brilliant for your resolve. You are mentally in the right place and made some good strategies. Have you thought about c25k for exercise? Its great, with a very supportive forum.

Good luck with your journey.

[HRHGaby]

Sometimes family and friends don't understand that it is not easy for us to lose weight. Your husband should be more considerate, but if he is not going to change then you should take control of your meals, your shopping and your time to exercise. If you have a mobile phone you can use an app to keep account of your calories and daily exercise. I use "FatSecret", but most of the people here use "MyFitnessPal". Good luck!

[fibronfedup]

Hey Im sorry to hear your partner seems to not be very supportive, thats horrible. But you should be so proud of yourself from reading this post, you are not letting anyone else determine what happens in your life and health. I think you have some great goals and more than enough determination to conquer them all. This site wil;l hopefully give you the support that you are lacking at home.

Myfitnesspal is a great app ive been using it for months now i wouldnt be without it. So simple and easy to use. A very positive post overall which is always great to read, my partner is a twig and can eat whatever he wants and doesnt gain but he still helps me by cooking good healthy food and if he fancies something a little more unhealthy he adds it on to his meal after preparing mine. Which has been a great help especially when work gets in the way sometimes. I wish you all the best, finding changes you can sustain long term is the best thing you can do. Good luck with your goals. Keep us updated

[Arthrath 7lbs]

Thank you all so much for your kind words.

I wasn't expecting any replies, just typing into the ether.

You are all very encouraging. I am sure that you will all look at your partners in a new light and with renewed affection. Don't forget to give them a hug.

I have just come back from shopping and the only 'extras' were a bunch of flowers and a hot roast chicken on special which I will make straight into meals and freeze.

I am on a roll!

[nhs2015]

Wow again. This is a fantastic post. I just love it. Full of positives and full of ideas. I like the freezing of meals with the calories written on it. Reading this post, I know you will get there. The way you are handling it, you are sure to succeed.

[Bslimsoon]

Well done Arthrath !..Your single mindedness,and determination is what you need to resolve your weight issue. positive attitude is admirable. I am doing 5:2 diet today is a fast day! my partner has just sat and eaten a hunk of banana bread with a cop of tea! I sat there with Rose green tea! That tests resolve...LOL very best of luck..you CAN do it !!

[Jenica]

I know what you mean about hubby eating and leaving things about to tempt you. Mine left toblerone out just before and I wasn't tempted, but, I did look at calories and OMG horrendous just for 1 piece!! I've been using my fitness pal app for past week without cheating and love it. I lost about 19-21lbs this time last year but put it all back on again but fingers crossed this is the final time and I will succeed. Good luck