As written here several times before, I have been trying and trying to get help with thyroid (hypo) - and consequences (asthma [they say] - rising BP - rising cholesterol - anemia/low ferritin -and OF COURSE, depression and anxiety......). Rising TSH and low-ish T4 were shrugged off and the prevailing remarks and tone across all my notes - both GP Practice and Hospital (Endo and Resp Consultants) - have been that it is most "in my head".
So, as an aside, I was involved in Group Therapy (attached to the local Mental Health ?Division), which I attended conscientiously for over a year but in the end failed for me precisely because it WAS a group and my horrid background does mean that I needed something more focused.
Towards the end of last year, I was assigned to a different GP (locum) at the Practice, who had obviously made a study of my record. So, even though I went there with PHYSICAL symptoms (short of breath - inability to lose weight - you know the list.....), he very quickly, and ignoring almost everything else - attributed EVERYTHING to my mental health. Of course...... I really must be super--human, nope - nothing physical could be any kind of problem :o/
He pushed me back toward the MH team (because he had worked there himself - but also) because he believed that I "have not been well served by the mental health team" *sigh*. That was at the start of the year.
I was "levelled up" and to be assessed by a Psychiatrist....... Now, it isn't unheard of for Psychiatrists to recognise that the m/h problems may stem from thyroid issues - is it? - so that was one of the main reasons I thought that it might be worth going ahead, albeit reluctantly.
It was not great - and God knows, I do not like summarising my life - and what a failure I am - in a short space of time and to a stranger. He did say - and the mention of thyroid was by him, not me, so he had got that from somewhere - that he would write to "my" GP and ask if all test that could be done had BEEN done, so I left with that and a follow-up 4 weeks later.
When that came around, he was delayed by 20 minutes for a half-hour appointment and did not tell me that there would be time, just seem rushed and cross with me (and yes, he is not English, so some of my wry humour fell (very) flat) and even more so when I tentatively said that I was worried about his use of the word "hypochondriac" at the last appointment. He went onto justify it, saying that if 11 doctors and two consultants could not "find anything" wrong with the thyroid, then I am creating the problem for myself. He said that he had not heard back from the Dr, but he was leafing through what looked like a fairly long letter.....
I requested a copy of the letter through three channels (the Secretary, my GP Practice and Information Governance) - and did receive copies from two of them - and ALSO of a letter that he had written after the follow up appointment.
So, after one hour and around 10 minutes and a whistle-stop tour through my horrible life, he has offered to the (wrong) doctor - although this will be ON MY RECORD (!!!!) - together with an awful lot of other "stuff" that is 100% twisted/his perspective only (and I don't care if he is a professional, trained for 50 years or whatever......) - a "working diagnosis" of:
> Traits of Emotionally Unstable Personality Disorder
> Hypochondriacal Disorder with anxiety and depressive symptoms
which, wouldn't you say, covers almost everything????
And yet, is withdrawing all treatment from the mental health team, due to (my) poor engagement :o( But has happily put a different anti-depressant on repeat. (I don't take them and never will - but he was grumpy when I declined them at the first appointment.)
He also included something in the initial four page letter (which never asked about the damn blood tests) that I told him that I did not know was going to be recorded and passed to the GP, which was also inaccurate due to him not listening, but which is also on my notes now and essentially carved in stone and it is the devil's own job to get them changed/annotated. If it were possible, I would want to take legal action - but so far, I have taken steps to raise it through the CCG. But it is made even more difficult by him - being a locum - now having gone (his words) "home to Poland" - and any sort of follow-up would be with another locum as they apparently have not had a staff Psych for over a year (!).
So friends, I am now left without help with physical issues - even though the regular GP wants to tell me my mental health is the ONLY problem - and from the mental health side, I am not worth helping and it seems that his objective was to endorse the Dr's opinion.....
So, for me, this is what happens when you try to be determined and repeatedly ask for help.
Be afraid, be very afraid.