Wasting my life on the loo

Hey all,

This is my first post. I've read many of yours with interest and read many IBS articles in the past. I find many of the symptoms people describe familiar, but others I don't experience at all. So here are my problems. Is this IBS? Does anyone else experience this? It's genuinely ruining my life, so I'd love to hear your thoughts.

So, every morning I get up at 5:00am, have a quick bowl of cereal, then settle in for a long spell on the toilet. I am then stuck there for the next three hours until I have fully evacuated my bowel. Often my stomach feels OK after that and I can go to work and enjoy a relatively normal day, but by evening the feeling of needing the loo has always returned. Other times I'll still feel like I haven't fully evacuated even after three hours and will then have to spend my lunch hour on the loo.

My stool is essentially like a cowpat in consistency. Not quite water-like, but certainly not solid. When I first sit on the toilet, it is relatively forthcoming, but it gradually slows down to dribs and drabs. Eventually, I'm passing nothing more than mucus. That, and the feeling of being 'empty', is how I know I have finished going to the toilet.

It is so, so frustrating. I'm always exhausted because I have to be up almost four hours before I can leave the house in the morning. I'm always the last into work. It's impossible for me to look after my young child on my own because I obviously can't leave him for hours on end. And my poor wife is quite literally left holding the baby while I struggle away locked in the bathroom. I feel like I'm wasting my life, missing out on so much and letting my family and work down because there's so much i can't do.

I could go on, but this isn't therapy. If anyone experiences anything like this, I'd love to hear from you. Especially if you've overcome it!

11 Replies

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  • Time to make Dr appointment for help.

    Keep food diary to hopefully help to find out if your problem is food related. Agonizing over your problem compounds the anxiety you are having.

    Choose something else to eat for breakfast; scrambled eggs and 1/2 baked sweet potato plain. Then go about your day. Do not go sit on toilet for the rest of your morning. Go to the bathroom when you feel the urge, eventually you'll get back on track.

  • Hi do you have milk on your breakfast-I have lactose intolerance and this what you discribe happens to me-I get lactose-free from Morrisons and any good super market.

    best Wishes

  • Strangely enough I did swap to rice milk for a year to see if that would help, but I didn't notice any change so I'm back on the real stuff now. Maybe I should try it again and cut all lactose/dairy entirely. Did it improve your situation noticeably?

  • Hi rice milk is just as bad-yes lactose free helped greatly and I dont have throjectile vomiting and super accidic runs anymore- I have meberverine on prescription or spasmonal and immodium syrup from the consultant.

    The main problem with me is anxiety; and am having CBT for this.

    Also my GP put me on 10mg amitrityline that helped me to calm down; get a good nights sleep and helps with the flareups of stress.

    my GP said that" evertime I get an upset or stress it hits me strait in the guts; but other people would get high blood pressure "many people follow Fodmap diet but I cant stick with it and, for me, there are too many things to give up BUT of course, I cant have coffee so I have decaffe and cant have any alcohol its like I have drunk poison or acid.

    cant have any stimulants at all, so thats no cola or energie drinks and chocolate.

    10 mg of amitriptyline is NOT for depression

    Very Best Wishes and do let me know how you go on

  • I am now In my 60s late 60s, I now have other more serious ill health problems, kidney Desesase zone 3, it only goes to 5. Hypertension when I Stand up, it drops, when I sit it goes over the top, today, I e need up in hospital, my blood pressure was 198/90 I could have had a stroke, or a heart attack. I was told lime you cbt but is not for everyone, it will help cure your problems now but if you have got issues from the past this therapy will not help, I should know,I had been a victim of a young stalker, then I had a fire and a neurologist stated cbt, my own GP, has stood and said no. As it will help pjt your people.s right now but not those from the past, ii am now to have proper councilling, as I had a fire, I was Attacked by my new partner, then conntractors who ut my home right didn't finish it properly, all my stress built up, I screa.ed, and my brain said enough is e noughits just stRting to let go of my horror I wake screaming, and i have a dystonic tremor, with non epileptic attacks but c bt would not, and will never repair the trau.a I went though. Now I'm bein stalked again, I'm back home in bed resting, I'm on Lorazepam with Clonazepam which I am told is hard to ever come off while Lorazapam is for stress, and fits, I'm staying on this I feel mu h better, than I did, talk to your gp, tell them just how you feel, may e you will get on with I I hope you will but its not cod everyone.lilybud.

  • I can not even have that my body just rejects it.

  • I agree that you should go to the GP And get checked out. I'm glad I finally did so and had a colonoscopy to rule out various things.

    It takes me quite a while to get out of the house and I'm never quite sure if I've done. I have improved though with some things - I was told by the consultant to have more fibre in my diet, to take Imodium as appropriate (long term use is fine apparently) and also improved some after the colonoscopy 'clear out' procedure. I am also trying to address my mental health as Stress and anxiety is my main problem.

    You need to try to work out what isn't helping you and it may be things like food intolerance, long term anxiety and habit based and then try to address it. Keep a diary about food and how you are feeling that day and see if there are patterns emerging. Are you any better when not working for instance? You can look at appropriate medications then with your GP.

    Good luck - you can make improvements and make things more manageable.

  • Hi, thanks for your reply. I definitely think a dietary change might help. I've been going to the doctor/hospital fairly regularly for the last 10 years, had various procedures (including a colonoscopy) and they've never really helped me. In truth I don't think they take it seriously because it's not life threatening. Good to hear you improved your situation though, it does give me hope.

  • you Have hit on the head the Doctors do ntake it seriously enough, some haven't clue Imodium is lethal with me i have an intolerance to it. Its just usless.

  • After breakfast was always the worst for me, so I stopped eating cereal and would just eat an apple or pear, but STILL would be running back and forth to the bathroom. When I started the low FODMAP diet I discovered that apple and pear were no-nos! No wonder I was still feeling so bad! Since going on the diet (past 6 weeks) things are SOOO much better! Check it out and try it full force for a little while. For me, it has given me lots more time off the toilet, which I am so thankful for since giving directions to kids through the bathroom door all morning is not ideal!!

  • hi your not alone when I first started with it I would have a dish of cerial similar to yourself, if I am correct it was Alpen so I changed it to cornflakes, no sooner had i eaten it I had to run to the loo. I would have cramping pains and was Stuck on the loo, until my bowels seemed to say right ok, I've done my bit now go. I would so tired and exhausted I never new what was around the corner, I would. Be ok for while, but come lunchtime & all hell was let loose. Until I felt enough was enough, I made an appointment with the Dr and tests were being carried, when I found out what it was, I like you and many others across the country, felt that it was the, what had caused it no one new. It was put Down to stress, I was young, in work, and in a deeply loving relationship until this happened, but my partner couldn't understand why I didn't want to go out drinking with him, and slowly we ended up splitting up ten years of my life just ended over thhis why. I don't know to this day. But no one seemed to care either. So was forced to have medication to keep it in check, it did for so long but stress is the main key in it. Go and talk to your Gp, he or she should help you cope with it they should give you a diet sheet of all the foods you must leave alone acid as in vinegar, fruits etc will affect you eat brown bread, but one thing is for sure, the five a day is an utter joke if it is ibs, as. IBS, has not a care for you or your bowels,it has a mind of its own,but its up to you to take control of what you want to eat, just make a list each day, and if you don't go to the loo your on a winner its ti.e consuming, but only you can take stock of what you eat &drink, get codeine phosphate ranitidine, and Buscopan, these will make it stop but don't stop taking it.lots of us have tried pepper mint in capsule form but we found that it didn't work after after while, now I'm on Galveston advance plus yipee its working, and back in a fashion, I will never be well again. But I have to sat h whAt I eat, every day for the rest of my life. So will you, but you will do it.lilybud

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