Fantasising & gaps in memory

[Youshallnotpass84]

I don't have dissociative disorder or anything like it, but I often find myself covering over trauma, like when I was bullied as a teenager. I pretended to myself I had a boyfriend, social circle, and hung out at friends' houses that I have completely fabricated. Of course these are not memories. They are missed opportunities. Things I missed out on.

Is it healthy to pretend? I'm not forcing it, my mind is sort of doing it on its own, and I'm allowing it because for a moment, it makes me feel like I could've been normal given the opportunity. My childhood was just me doing regular stuff, children do, but in reality I was ostracised by my peers for no reason.