OK! I admit it straight away, I hate them, especially the hygienist! Never come out feeling great, the only good thing, it's the longest time, until I have to go through it again!

But today, has to be the worst. Trying to get S in and out of there was soooooo hard. Big old Victorian building, 4 huge steps into the surgery. They did put a ramp down, but that caused a fuss, we had to wait outside, until it could be done. Getting him in and out of the chair, again was a mission! Then he had to sit in the waiting room for me to have my check up. Coming out, again the ramp had to be put down, coming down, was very scary, felt like I was dropping him off a huge cliff!

Then, the new wheelchair, that the NHS have given us, it's so heavy, I got my hand trapped, because just as I got it into the boot, it suddenly decided to move in a different way that I was trying to get to do!!!

Needless to say, I burst into tears, upsetting S! They weren't kidding, when they say a Carers life is hard. It's not just hard, but totally impossible. Then I had to go to the vets, as the stupid receptionist got the dates wrong, for the pups flea pills and on to the garage to get my tyre changed on the car, due to a slow puncture. How can you get anything done? I have so much to do today, now I am totally wiped out. I just want to go to bed, pull the duvet up and forget the world for several days.

Do you think I have a chance???.?.??????

My opinion as well!!!!

Lots of love


16 Replies

  • Oh Heady feeling sorry for you, those wheelchairs are heavy, putti them in and out of the car. They should have a dentist that can come in a do a check up.

    Know how you are feeling, today has been an easy day, George at centre, but he looks so white, and tired, told him to have a little sleep on his chair.

    Hope you had the tyre changed without any problems, I suppose you had to get S out of the car for that! On Tuesday they are bringing George a hospital bed, feeling sad!!!!

    Love to you all Yvonne xxxxxx

  • A hospital bed is another step down the slippery slope, isn't it? Don't feel sad however, as they are so useful for you both. I felt like you do, but now,I am glad of it. I raise it when changing sheets and it saves my back from strain. Also, my husband can have tea and breakfast in bed if he hasn't got a paid carer that morning as I can get him into the right position for eating and drinking. All good wishes. x

  • I felt sad too but you wouldn't believe the fun we have when the grandchildren come! Supervised fun of course but they love having rides on it. It's even more fun if you have a ripple air mattress as well, especially when the valve comes out and it deflates. Never a dull moment with PSP.


  • NannaB did you put a single bed in the room with Colin when he got the hospital bed? Felt like I should, but my son is saying mum you need to look after yourself and get some sleep, you look so tired, I think they are worried about me. Just feel sad that we are at this stage. Yvonne x

  • Hi Yvonne, yes I did have a bed in the same room to start with but didn't get much sleep. If I'd slept apart however, I would have had to walk further to get to him as he was awake most of the night. By being near him, sometimes just hearing me would help him relax. I also felt he must be feeling sad to have to sleep in a hospital bed so that, and not having me nearby after over 40 years of sleeping together would be too much to take in one go. Now he is downstairs and I'm back in our double bed. I am in what seems a very rare and privileged situation. Colin has CHC and we have a night nurse 6 nights a week. On the one night when it is just me, I take the monitor to bed with me so I can see and hear him. I have to go downstairs at least once every hour but cat nap between times as I'm more relaxed knowing I'll hear him. My eldest son often tells me what I should or should not be doing and I know they all worry about me but I do what I think will be easier for me.

    It is sad when we see the decline isn't it but I am so grateful that there is equipment available to make things a bit easier.


  • Thank you NannaB will put a single bed in as well see how it goes, we have been sleeping together for 47 years it's hard. Thank you once again. Yvonne x

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  • Oh Heady, You've come this have a chance darlin!

    Are ramps not 1 inch down every 12 inches in height.....oh UK uhm for every 3m in height it should be 7m ramp slope down....? Anyway. When taking S down a ramp. Turn the man around and walk'll have more control of the chair and it's contents!....Better yet, get some stock boy on his 3d cigarette to do it for you...just remember to have him turn chair around!

    Is there not a way you could have let S stay at home or take him to the center for a couple of hours....Maybe you could get that few hours a week/month where they come in to give him a break?....No rest for the freakin weary eh? I thought I would die last week or was it week before....But here I am still taking joy in having no door to the loo.....what a life eh?

    I did get to go to the movies. War Room! Wow everyone needs to see that one!

    Well I hope you have a better day or had a better day.

    With Aching Joints,


  • Hi Heady, I agree about NHS wheelchairs being heavy. The new one I have is almost as heavy as M so I am pushing my weight 95 kg (200lb old money), at last after 6 months telling my GP it was too heavy and my hips hurt after pushing it round town she has agreed and told the wheelchair service to hurry up with provision of motor assisted one. Our dentist is also in a Victorian building but has a concrete slope at 1:10 so fairly easy but had to change dentist as our old one had an upstairs surgery so we changed to a partner on ground floor. Do not get upset getting them to get the slope out under disabled access legislation it should be available and they should assist, if they do not contact local CAB and Health board to complain. Agree about going down slope backwards gives more control. It may be worth considering a wheelchair accessible vehicle (WAV) rather than lifting your chair into back of your car. If not on motorbility there are a number of 2nd hand dealers who specialise in WAV's who deliver and allow you to test your chair. Though not happy to do the transition I replaced my Nissan Note with an adapted Renault Kangoo, a month ago. It is so much easier moving M and the chair wish I had done it earlier.

    The duvet sounds great idea, do it if you can.

    Best wishes Tim

  • I changed my car for a wheelchair adapted vehicle, much older, but it has changed our life, as I have back troubles and the chair lifting was making it worse. Also, I got the Occupational Therapist to put in for a wheelchair with a little removable battery, which saves a lot of hard pushing. I thought all public places were supposed to be wheelchair friendly? Our dentists has a special door on the level and always makes appointments for my husband on the ground floor. It might be worth asking, there may be a back way in or something. I do know how you feel, I have been there before and the other day, friends took us out and we used the old wheelchair. I could hardly walk yesterday having pushed it only a short distance.

    Lots of warm feelings winging your way. xx

  • Am so glad Brian has got a full set of dentures so he doesn't need to go to the dentist. I had so much work done when i was in my 40's. I used to have the 1st apt after doing night shift so i used to vertualy sleep through the treatment. I had all my teeth silaconed into place because I've got a crumbling jaw. That was supposed to keep them in my mouth till i died. But hey how now in my 50's the teeth prefer to be in the sink when i clean them. No pain but all wobbly and every now and again i spit one out with the toothpaste. Janexx

  • Sorry Heady, no chance. I hope tomorrow/today is better.

    Our dentist sounds like yours. Big Victorian building etc. The ramp they put down for us was no good as it was too near a wall so the turning circle was too small for me to manouver the wheelchair up it. The dentist realised it was ridiculous and C wouldn't be able to see him again. He wrote to someone, no idea who, and we had an appointment sent through from a dental surgery attached to a hospital. I had to wheel the chair onto a platform and it was fixed to it. The dentist was then able to tip the whole thing back with C still in it. He ended up having a wisdom tooth out which wasn't easy as the poor dentist nearly had his finger bitten off but he sent a letter to our dentist saying he has now registered Colin and would see him in the future on the NHS.

    Perhaps there is somewhere similar in your area. It's worth asking the dentist.


  • Our dentist does home visits now for Keith, his surgery has a very steep staircase up to it and the last time we went I nearly had a heart attack as Keith decided to go up at 100 miles per hour and frightened me to death! He's told us that if Keith needs any treatment he can send us to a surgery without any steps or stairs thank goodness!

    Most medical practices seem willing to help in our circumstances so it's well worth enquiring, as we all know too well nobody jumps out at you with suggestions, you have to do it yourself!

    As someone else once said I'm turning into a right pushy cow, but it does seem to get some results (well nearly always!)

    Love and hugs to you all....Pat xx

  • Oh Heady what next? We have now had our wheelchair for ten days but since it came home from shop it hasn,t been back into car boot. We trundle C around house and garden and out to car, then leave chair at home. At day care he has two assistants helping him walk. If we go shopping he sits in car while I dash in and out of shops though since he started day care at end of April I now do main shopping, and any other stuff (like getting tyres sorted) on his day care days. We are hoping to manage without a hospital bed. We moved into single beds in what used to be our winter dining room last October. C's bed is on risers brought from UK by a friend. The wheelchair felt like a major deterioration to me even though it has made life much easier - I wouldn't be saying that if I had to heave it in and out of car on a regular basis. We just have to keep plodding on.

  • Please try asking your doctor or community matron for the number of the home visit dentist in your area. We have the dentist at home as we couldn't get Steve to our usual dentist. He sits in his chair for treatment so much easier for us. The home dentistry is done from central services so may be worth asking if it is available in your area

  • Hi Heady, I didn't realise one could get a wheelchair on the NHS - Doh! So went out and bought G a lightweight one, weighs 8kg (without G in of course) it's nice and compact and folds down well, although I do have a little difficulty getting it in the boot of the car as we have a four wheeler walker in the boot as well, and I end up hurting my poxy neck at times.

    On Thursday we were out and had a small paving slab to negotiate so turned round and tackled it backwards, no prob. On the way back I thought I can go forwards, however didn't account for a lump of Tarmac that I'd missed when we gone through first time. The consequences .......... G was nearly catapulted out of the chair, both ended up in fits of laughter, people watching must have thought I was some nutter carer, but we had a laugh and didn't care, I then like you trapped my hand when putting the chair in the boot, fortunately for me though I don't have any feeling in either arm/hand, but I did tell the chair off!

    Just remember tomorrow is another day.

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