Perhaps my earlier post was rather to detailed,but its how i was feeling at the time.
I am fortunate that i get an hour with a Physiologist every Monday by video link,which is of enormous help for my anxiety/depression ,I also get 3 calls a week from Winter wellness checking on me,and Ben a guy from the mental health team comes to visit me quite often too.Their help has been tremendous,and they concur that the things i've had to deal with throughout my life is more than most people could ever manage or imagine,it has been mentally debilitating in the extreme,but i keep going,but they do think i am at risk at times.
I must admit that sometimes my work becomes rather to much,and yet without my work i would find life unbearable,it really is a two edged sword,and work is important to me,it is the rent i pay for my time on earth.
Its just that in the past year everything that could have been thrown at me,has been,and everything i seem to touch goes haywire,and all is against me.
I certainly dont look for sympathy,but it would be nice if some folks understood,and this forum has many understanding people,who listen...and thank you so much.
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I'm so pleased that you get help with your anxiety an depression. I'm so pleased that today those that suffer mental health conditions are being understood. I have a daughter that was diagnosed as being Bi-Polar and she's fortunate enough to have a very good doctor and also some very understanding work colleagues and friends which I'm so pleased about. Her friend in the Midlands helped her a lot a few years ago when she was at her lowest. As she was away from home neither myself or my husband knew how bad she had got. I'm so pleased to say she's in a much better place and work is her solace.
Back to you though, I'm so pleased you get 3 calls a week and a guy from the Mental Health team visits you often. It's great when there is that level of help and understanding out there. I'm really pleased that mental health is understood like it is now, there's still a way to go in some areas but it's definitely getting better.
Work is definitely very important.
I have been overcome by a fear of being sick, Emetophobia, for many years and quite a long time ago I was cured by having Hypnotherapy but unfortunately a few years later I was bulled and regressed. I've had CBT since and it's better than it was but I'm not cured, just not quite an anxious.
I am a great believer in natural healing i.e. meditation (I know I said this earlier but I cannot find your original post), exercise, yoga and deep breathing.
I wish you all the very best of luck as I'm pretty sure you are going to start to feel much better, with the right help and natural remedies.
Oh gosh Alicia.....bullying is so damn cruel,and i've suffered that too,and it absolutely depletes you,but thankfully you are now in a much better place.x
I left a job last year as I was being bullied by management there and I was horrified to realise how common it is and they had bullied a colleague as well and she had ended up sacked for being sick with stress!
Next Friday it will be a year since I left that place and I'm glad I'm not there anymore but it took a long time to get over the feelings of unfairness of the situation but I have come to terms with it over time.
Oh yes I sure am and it no longer affects me, I've risen above it now and moved on. Yes I still have Emetophobia but I know that I will be rid of it, I am certain of that, it's not going to rule my life forever.
You've done really well by posting on here and you will be able to move forward and start feeling better as there is a lot of support on PWB. We are here to support and help each other.
I have left jobs because of bullying too and had developed a fear of work for a while, I'm glad you are getting help and hope them things I said in your other post have helped and sometimes we think it's never ending but things are slowly changing for me now and that's one thing in life it won't stay same forever sometimes it just takes a bit longer and we have to give fate a push in right direction big hugs from me and pixie hope you sleep well and try dons Tibet music he put on today I am tonight ⭐xxx
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Hello Alicia I'm sorry you've been going through all that and your daughter's problem, the exercise Im sure will help I suffer from occasional anxiety about my health too and other things,HRT has really helped and try eat healthy and I hardly drink alcohol as I was using this to relief my anxiety a while back when things were bad with rats and had p t s d and have collection of Paul mackenna hypnosis and meditation c d I went to Buddhist class last year where I bought these, and as you know I got the sad lamp which I need to do as no sun lately, I think so many of us suffer with these kind of things and as long as we self help it can be controlled usually, I need to be more consistent, I had fun walk with pixie watching the dogs his fur went up lol he's such a tonic, mam's been baking so looking forward to nice tea, and it's Saturday so I might have 2 glasses of wine whilst my comedy is on, I hope you have a peacefull night hugs from Mandy and pixie ⭐🌜xxx
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Hi Mandy
My daughter is in a very good place at the moment which I'm so pleased about. Exercise is definitely my go to, it makes me feel so good. I didn't get out today but I will definitely be getting out tomorrow for sure.
I'm so sorry you get anxious, it's a horrible thing but I'm so glad that HRT has helped and I've heard it's very good, I never went on it and have just about gone through it all now. Alcohol is one of the worst things you can have, it doesn't relax you at all, yoga and herbal tea would be so much better. The sad lamps are very good as we have such short days this time of year and particularly when the weather is bad.
I'm glad you had a lovely walk with Pixie and it's so funny when their fur stands on end.
Enjoy your evening and I hope you have a good night.
Alicia xx 🙏🌹🌈😍
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Thanks Alicia I enjoy chamomile tea it gets me down sometimes when it all accumulates and as you know my living arrangements I'm not even that anxious about virus now but mam's anxiety makes me anxious about her heart getting stressed etc and I've well and truly learned my lessen with alcohol, it just seems that I had bad run of luck for about 6 years starting with my colitis which I don't have now as mentioned before just slight IBS, and I'm bit stressed about my house it's stuck there costing me money and I could be renting it out but need to get rid as can't buy another without the house money,it's like I usually wake up feeling good but then I get sensitive about things with mam n pixie sinario lol and I start to get upset then and wish the long drawn out situation with my house will come to end at least my dad's at peace now and getting closure on his house which also was becoming a money pit, and I do worry about my mam dying and even pixie sometimes as he goes across road sometimes and have to shut it out my mind I wish I had a boyfriend then I feel everything will be easier to cope with bla bla enough babble and this is someone else's post lol I'm looking forward to my comedy tonight take care ⭐🐆🌜xxx
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That's good for you, I drink 3 ginger tea quite a lot. I know your living arrangements aren't the best but you'll be in your own place before you know it. The virus isn't really worrying me anymore to be honest, we just need to control it and the vaccine is right on our doorstep now.
I can well imagine if your mum is anxious, when you live with someone their anxiety can easily rub off on you for sure. Alcohol can get us all, makes us feel good one minute and then the next not so. Becoming stress can bring on IBS so maybe look at meditation, just a thought.
Things will get better, believe you me. You have a good night and enjoy the comedy.
Take care
Alicia xx 🌈😍
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Thanks yes dons put a nice tibet music video on I was meditating to it earlier and shut my eyes and nearly nodded off and of course pixie went fast asleep even quicker than usual lol, I never bothered with the 2 glasses wine I planned last Saturday so maby not tonight either enjoy your night, oh we got a selection of different teas 🌜xx
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I saw the post and that's beautiful music, like my yoga class.
I think I understand some of what you are saying. I have had problems with depression and anxiety since childhood. I am very fortunate that I am currently working with a excellent psychologist and I now know the origins of my difficulties. The irony is that I only got to see her because I was diagnosed with Post Traumatic Stress Disorder following a life changing brain injury and have been having EMDR treatment with her. I have learnt so much and I now have a completely different perspective on everything. Three years ago I spent a week in a suicide respite centre and that entirely changed my life. The most amazing and wonderful experience with incredibly compassionate people.
I understand what you mean about your job. I had a very stressful job, (which I loved,) but I was forced to stop working after the brain injury. I have found that very tough, but working can be very hard too.
I don't know if you might be interested, but there's a website called getselfhelp.co. uk
that has lots of resources and is recommended by the NHS, so it is legit.
Also, I met a psychotherapist and hypnotherapist who worked at my local brain injury support group and through him I tried trance/meditation/relaxation exercises. These can be really helpful for anxiety especially. It's not just that they help with relaxation, they can help change thinking patterns. A bit like CBT but acting on your subconscious. I was highly suspicious but because I trusted the guy I had a go and the effects on my state of mind were undeniable.
If you just want relaxation, have a look at Caroline McCready's YouTube channel. She does have some stuff specifically for anxiety.
I hope I haven't waffled on too much.
I still have lots to do and I have really challenging days, but I am in such a different place than I was earlier in my life.
I hope it's okay if I send you a hug.
Take care and feel free to message me if you would like to.
So glad you are now a lot better Marnie,and i agree depression is a very cruel condition,but you were so lucky to have spent time in a respite centre,where people are compassionate and caring.A hug for you too.x
I'm so sorry you feel so down. I have had depression so know you can't just jump out of it or go for a walk as some people think. You know all the answers but just can't get out of that dark hole. Its so debilitating. You are doing the right thing as you will know, keeping yourself occupied through your work even though its wearing at times.You are getting good support but are you taking any medication too? I found it helped me and I dont take anything now.
It will eventually ease even though you can't see any light at the end of the tunnel at the moment. Take each day as it comes, dont expect miracles but try doing some things that make you feel happier.
Hoping things get better for you soon. Just post us if you feel miserable, it helps to share our feelings with people who care.
Thank you Chrys for your kind words.Yes i do take medication (Sertraline 150mg) and as my sleeping is so abysmal i have been subscribed Melatonin which now its in my system is beginning to help an awful lot.x
I think that many of us are feeling similar with the Covid uncertainties. I can certainly agree with much of what you have written. My back story is also full of incident and acccident, and shielding is driving me stir crazy! I used to be a keen sportsperson, Horseriding, Rockclimbing, skiing, fencing and Ballroom Dancing! I was also active in Theatre groups, Wardrobe, Props, etc. I wasn't much of an actor, although I did a bit.
I'm retired from nursing now, but I still try to keep abreast of the latest things.
Getting old, and physically starting to break down is not pleasant, but it is part of life, and I fight it rather than give in to it.
I never thought that I would live in fear of a virus, especially with my knowledge, yet I do; if I have to go out I mask up, and have plastic gloves with me, also hand sanitiser.
That reminds me, I have to pop down to the shops for potatoes, carrots and parsnips!
Very true. I used to think that I have everything under control but with the pandemic and self-isolation I feel like I went down the spiral again and I am not happy about it at all. I have been diagnosed with an anxiety disorder a while ago and it has been a battle ever since. The reason why it has been particularly hard for me this pandemic is that I am usually a very social person (It kind of helps me get through the day) and the fact that we have to stay home all the time and not see other people kind of drove home the fact that I'd rather not look at myself too closely. t makes me anxious. I usually deal with my anxiety on my ow or through therapy but with the lock-down I was not able to do the things that usually make me calm down. I was feeling really down and so my therapist suggested I try kratom as a substitute for the anti-anxiety medication I refused to take. I was kind of skeptical at first since I never tried it and I wasn't sure it would help but after some research I thought that it was worth a try. I did a lot of research regarding different brands and stores and varieties and settled on a red maeng da powder that I ordered from this store here: kratommystic.com. I got the package a few weeks ago I have been taking a little every day. Surprisingly it does help so I think that if you guys don't like typical drugs like me this might be a good natural alternative
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