Ability to see through self limitation - Positive Wellbein...

Positive Wellbeing During Self-Isolation

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Ability to see through self limitation

Roukaya profile image
27 Replies

I have been able to connect through this post as it is one of my only lifelines of communication.

Last year I almost cried before my fiftieth birthday as I remained unmarried and still seeking employment,

Though the Lock Down I can see why I have struggled the pass the Diploma in Wills and Probate and find a years work experience to requalify

Yesterday it was an important day for prayer for Muslims and tomorrow is Good Friday

I cared for an elderly Father until a few years ago and now given his loss I am trying to rebuild myself in a career passion that could be very fulfilling and rewarding

Having faith in myself and to listen to an an elderly and demanding Mother I think has been a disruptive influence and I can now see why I have failed with borderline failures and my lack of perseverance again is attributed to putting her needs first

I can now see this

I remember when I was a Birmingham Airport I had met a devout Christian who was fifty as well and had suffered loss and I can remember her parting words

At fifty we still have a life ahead of us

I also remember her beaming smile as she first said hello

That to me is the ability to positively inspire to give hope to a broken spirit

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Roukaya profile image
Roukaya
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27 Replies
starveycat profile image
starveycat

Fifty is still young. I'm 79 and even though people think I'm old I don't regard myself as that. We all have an inner strength that sometimes we find hard to find. Remember in this whole world you are unique.

Roukaya profile image
Roukaya in reply tostarveycat

I hope you are safe and well

Life is what we make if it regardless of our age

Thank you

Mapl profile image
Mapl

Hi Roukaya ,

I'm Becky I'm 50 in September, recently divorced ( but totally relieved and celebrating my freedom 😃 ) part time carer for a very fragile mum. My little dog Lara is really getting me through lockdown plus a bit of gardening. I have a horse called Digby but our yard is on lockdown so can't visit. In uk ( I don't know where you are ) our priminister is in intensive care 😪🇬🇧 and there is no end to our lockdown soon but sadly it's very very necessary.

So over this Easter I won't be going far

but since the weather's sunny I'm going to get out in my garden- no excuses for me !

Roukaya profile image
Roukaya in reply toMapl

Thank our for your uplifting message

I hope you enjoy your new found freedom

bobbybobb profile image
bobbybobbAmbassador

Did you know, Canada offer their pensioners free legal degrees. Some of those pensioners actually go on to use those degrees in a work place and come out of retirement. So at 50 you need too go for it, you have lots of life left to get there and enjoy it. You have said it yourself in your post, perseverance. You now understand the reasons why you have failed, so knowing this will help you avoid certain triggers to knock you down or prepare you to move forward regardless. You are important and you need to do this for you. Have a great day. 🌷🌼🌻

Roukaya profile image
Roukaya in reply tobobbybobb

I hope you are well,

I am very touched with your kind words of reassurance and encouragement.

I had no idea that Canadians can practice law beyond the years of retirement.

Very encouraging

I hope you stay safe and well .

You always say such kind words when it matters the most.

Hi Roukaya,

Around fifty is a good time to take a real stock of your life. It's a time when we often wake up to the fact that life and time are flying away. Of course you have hopefully got lots of life ahead of you still, but it's not a bad time to take stock of what's gone in the past and what you can achieve in the future.

You've been very dutiful in terms of your family but perhaps now is the time to work out how you can still help them and in particular your mother, but still try to achieve some of the things you want, and need, to do.

Perhaps you are concentrating too much on your mum's needs and that needs readjusting. It's right to care about your family and particularly your parents, but you can't solve all their crises or make their lives perfect. You have needs too.

Do you maybe also depend on your mother a little bit too? It's often a two-way street and can become an excuse for not pressing on with your own life.

Perhaps if you wrote down the things you really want to achieve in this second half of your life and thought through ways in which you can adjust your thinking and the ways in which you assist your mother, to see if there is some sort of compromise. Occasionally we also hang on to goals which we should really be letting go of. See if there are any of those, which are now just past dreams and not worth making ourselves anxious over.

Wishing you peace at this important time in the calendar of your faith, and I hope you will have a pleasant day today. Take care, and remember that, Inshallah, you have many years ahead of hopefully happy life. Believe in yourself and follow your dreams. 🦋🌸

Roukaya profile image
Roukaya in reply to

I thank you for a very uplifting post, you have mentioned many aspects which I think of subliminally

By caring and being there for my Mother is I expect a way of me putting my own responsibilities in second place

I agree if God gives life it will be a chance to

rebuild a life central to our own fullfillment.

I will continue to try to take more responsibility for my own life and realise that I cannot shield my Mother from her own anxieties.

We owe it to ourselves to try to make the best of whatever the Almighty has given us

This is a testing time , a time to learn , to observe and to grow.

I honestly believe the limitations which precluded me from finding an entry level role in Wills and Probate may not as defined as before

Given the global impact of this pandemic, there may be a place for me to practice Wills and Probate with compelling compassion and strong minded determination .

I know when you say I should rethink what I am trying to do if it leads to anxiety

But I have always followed my instinct and heart and even though I struggle it just means I was not ready then given my mental state at the time

I thank you for having the time to listen and to give me insight

CarpeDiem11 profile image
CarpeDiem11 in reply toRoukaya

Many people do not take on board advice that has been given, nor do they fully chew it over and consider it. It is so heartening to see (and I don't want to appear patronising) you really mulling the advice over and taking it in the spirit it was meant. I really hope that things go well for you and that this advice spurs you on to look after yourself. Wishing you well⚘⚘

CarpeDiem11 profile image
CarpeDiem11 in reply to

It is so uplifting to read such a supportive and well thought out post. I only wish that other boards had such a constructive moderator at their helm. I for one think many of us can take something positive from this post. Many thanks for your generosity of spirit. All the very best ⚘⚘

in reply toCarpeDiem11

Thank you for those kind words CarpeDiem11 🙏

Roukaya profile image
Roukaya in reply toCarpeDiem11

I agree it was a well thought out and well written post

I will always be grateful to those who have shown great support and understanding

Troilus profile image
Troilus

They say life begins at fifty. Go for it girl!

Roukaya profile image
Roukaya in reply toTroilus

Thank you

Make the best of life

Nuttyshirlz profile image
Nuttyshirlz

Yes I did when I was becoming 50 think we all do. But I am one of them type of ppl I always put others first. I’ve recently split with someone and if anything I’d say Coronavirus as made me think about my life. Also what I want out of it. I now no what I’m going to do afterwards. I’m 55 in 10 days lol I’d like to think Ive got 30-40 years left in me 🤣

Roukaya profile image
Roukaya in reply toNuttyshirlz

Life you life to the full

That is what is have always said

Nuttyshirlz profile image
Nuttyshirlz in reply toRoukaya

Yeah I’d like to think so lol

in reply toNuttyshirlz

This coronavirus scare has made me take a step back and reevaluate my life as well!

Roukaya profile image
Roukaya

I hope you are well.

Thank you for your kind understanding .

This period if self isolation is a time to reflect on what matters the most and to refocus our aims and to realise what makes us happy

It is a testing time for us all and we try to cope in the best way we can.

I hope you remain safe and well .

RoadRunner44 profile image
RoadRunner44

Hello Roukaya,

I have read many of your previous posts telling us of your plight and problems. We have understood and sympathized with your difficulties including myself. Many of us have offered you advice and support! However, at the end of the day it is up to each one of us to see the wider picture to help us find ways of dealing with our problems.

I am delighted to say, this appears to have happened to you! ,Your latest post shows you are coming to terms with your difficulties and recognizing how certain things have disrupted and are still affecting your whole life! This couldn't and shouldn't continue!

Your post suggests you have found renewed confidence in your ability and happily, you are beginning to move forward in your life. The result being, you are now taking up the reigns of your life once again. I really hope this will continue and you find the peace and happiness you deserve.

Sent with my very best wishes,

Chrys ☺

Roukaya profile image
Roukaya in reply toRoadRunner44

It would seem from an observer listening to my plight that you can see a difference in my ability to help myself

Very understanding and very encouraging

The poignant words to take the reigns , that will really stay with me

I wish you well and thank you

wiserlady profile image
wiserlady

This might help. I use it sometimes and it is free with no signing up. A free prayer forum, the only one I could find. No signing up or contacting you after. It helps me a lot when feeling lost or alone. But I also like to be proactive and do things to make things better. accuratepsychicreadingsonli...

Roukaya profile image
Roukaya in reply towiserlady

It would be helpful and if you are a pro active to set up a forum for those who are living alone

Let us know as to how this can be done

vulnerable profile image
vulnerable

Beautiful words 💝

Roukaya profile image
Roukaya

I thank you a great deal for your warmth and sincerity

Thus is much appreciated

It is so important to know you have done your utmost for your parents and they must be deeply proud of having a kind a compassionate son as you

Roukaya profile image
Roukaya

Thank you😎

brwnskinbeauty profile image
brwnskinbeauty

Yes, you are 50 years old, but it is true that you still have a lot of living to do. I am 52, but when I turned 50, I looked at it as being the second act of my life, a time to accomplish the items on my bucket list.

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