New and feeling sorry for myself

Hi I'm Fiona, age39 had chronic back pain for over 12 years now, had surgery 10 years ago for a partial discectomy, the disc just rotted away, the surgery left me with sciatica and some swelling in my foot/ankle walking is hard.

Anyway today my whole back is really hurting, in tears with the pain, i just wanted to have a moan to people who understand just how bad it is.

I have had my full dose of tramadol, gabapenton and diazapam piroxicam gel, feel bit woozy but still hurting

Anyway i do not always complain, and probably not the best way to introduce myself so sorry for that!

22 Replies

  • Hello fiona,I know exactly what you going through, I woke up this morning early so emotional and in tears because of the pain in my lower spine, I had this pain for years but didn't think much of it until 3 years ago when I started to couldn't get out the bed to go to the toilet, I myself had put it down to meny years of running the marathon,but a MIR scan in 20012 shows that all my discs are in their normal position, they've ruled out any red flag, because of the extend of pain Im having and it's deep down inside my spine I realy taught it was something very serious, the Dr reasure me that I havent got what I taught it was,the pain is so severe that it spread throughout my whole body especially at night,.the pain is even sensitive to loud noises, they've try every painkiller that is possible but noting seams to tuch the pain and then the will leave me with side effect. Iv bin told that my body does not reacted to painkillers so I just have to learn to cope with pain forever how long, Iv baught a tens machine and I taught that will do the trick but it hasn't, the Dr said it's nerve endings I have, Iv ask for a cortisone injection but they refuse to give me one due to the risk ,wish I can wakeup one day and it all go away,best wishes to you. LISA

  • Thats awful, I really feel for you. Have you tried acupuncture? I got some sessions with the physio and pain clinic, it helped for a short while.

    I still havent slept yet, but despite feeling so tired still hurting I have stopped the tears for now at least


  • Hello again,well funny enough my daughter is trying to get some accupunfuture Apointmemt for me now, last resort.

  • I hope it at the very least makes a small difference. I was told it should help for a few days, i only got 2 good days, but it was well worth it!

  • Ice often helps with me. 15 mins on and 45 minutes off. Simple but often effective

  • Hi...Its good to have a rant now and again, people are prepared to listen, as most of us feel the same............takecare

  • Thanks! and I will be here if you want to do the same

  • Hello Fiona, you are young to be having all those problems, I have had back problems for many years but now at 77 they are really bad. All my joint involved, I did have nerve blocks in my lower back a few years ago which really helped but now I try to keep going with mediation,I have an electric heating pad which helps at times for my shoulder and neck, worth a try and I go to an osteopath which my son pays for me every few weeks and he helps me too.I went on the NHS to physio for quite a while but he said eventually I would just have to rely on extra medication when I had flare ups. I do hope your doctor can help you more with getting you some relief. Take care

  • Thanks for replying. I have not tried meditation, my mind is total chaos!

  • hi, I understand where you are coming from, some days the pain really gets me down. Then I have a good day and overdue it, the result about 2-3 days of really chronic pain even with my meds and agony trying to walk the dog! I think we would explode if we didn't have an outburst now and again

  • Hi Fiona, feel for you. It is so hard just to keep going every day. Hubby and I are at my daughters for a couple of weeks trying to help her get her life back in order after her long term relationship has ended. Four kids and a house that is in total disarray. I cannot believe how my body has deteriorated and the pain levels are out of this world, so I know how you are feeling.

    Try and relax, let the meds kick in. Lie on the bed/couch and try to distract yourself for an hour or so until you get some relief. Wishing you well, Ann.

  • I read or do online jigsaws (i have an exciting life) they help to distract me, if i get a comfy position i do my best not to move even a tiny bit

  • Hope all is sorted soon Anne. Sometimes only a mother will do.

  • Hi, a hell of a lot better in her house now, so good to spend some time with my daughter and grand kids. it amazes me how far I can endure really severe pain. The mind plays a big part. You either give in or attack it back!

  • Hi Fiona, my name's Teresa, and it's ok to whine and feel sorry for yourself. I know just where you are at, I've had horrible back pain for years and it's awful, debilitating. Pain is a horrible thing to deal with, especially on a daily basis. Anyway,I just wanted to let you know you are not alone and you can come here to talk anytime to vent, it seems all of those who are here know what it's like and totally understand. Hoping you feel better soon.

  • Thanks, even just talking here makes a difference, not with the pain though!

  • Hi my name is Nat I know what its like to live with back pain I have lived with it for yrs I fell on my tail bone and I bruised it bad and then I had another fall and I bruised my tail bone again so now my low back is sore all the time I find that pressure on my low back really helps and getting massages help to :)

  • Hi Fiona I'm so with you I'm the same age and my back as Of last year has given me so much pain and discomfort it drives me crazy I'm on a load of meds feel like a prescribed junkie . We all have days where it gets too much and yes you have the right to moan and complain I try not to cos I'm sure my family get fed up with it even when they ask I say I'm fine my daughter has picked up on my facial expressions which I really don't want thought I had hidden it but we new an outburst / release at times and speak to people that understand I read a lot of posts on here and it makes me feel like I'm not alone and folk understand how debilitating pain is physically and mentally . I look at it in a way it makes us stronger.

    Hope you feel better soon x

  • It does make a huge difference knowing that others do understand!

  • hi I'm new aswell and I'm in pain with a lot of things my back ive got that brittle bones but no pain killer helps and gabapentin I'm on them for my fits diazapan well not surpose to take them but helps me sleep but don't get a lot as I'm having trouble with my liver and tramadol cant take them but back pain is murder I cant get around with that cant u ask doctor for cream ok might not work but its worth a try all I do is moan as I'm in a lot pain so don't feel sorry for yourself cause its not your fault anyway speak soon

  • Its not fun is it!

    my partner and son are so used to me being in pain that when i make a pained noise, they just ignore me, they used to ask if they could do anything for me, now just get ignored.

  • hi bluebird I get the same I'm awake all night with the pain and my other half says as joke well he better be saying hes gonna put me in a home as I don't know what to do with myself all I can say no there is nothink they can do but be there I'm hoping that whatever it is on my liver they get it out cause this is been going on to long and pain killers are useless well keep strong xx

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