Hi there ovacome pals,
I'm sorry I haven't been around much for a while. I have had a busy, sad and traumatic couple of months.
Since my 50th bithday party when I was on such a high things went down hill fast. Firstly my wonderful mother in law had a stroke and even though the hospital said at first it wasn't life threatening within a week she passed away. Our whole family were in shock and my youngest son took it really badly.
Then 5 days after her passing our beloved dog Oscar's back legs became paralysed. I rushed him to the vet and then to a specialist who operated that day. He came through the operation but one of the disc's in his back had ruptured causing damage to his spinal cord. It was touch and go whether he would make it and sadly 3 days after that i sat with him while he was put to sleep. He was only 4 years old.
I have never been in such an awful place as I was dealing with this grief. I had to be there for my husband, my two sons and deal with my own grief. It was the darkest time of my life maybe even worse than being diagnosed with OC. I spent days crying in between working as a childminder and trying to raise my sons spirits.
The week after this we attended my mother in laws funeral which was tough not only because of the grief of losing her and also my dog but the reality that all these people will be at my funeral including my georgeous boys trying to be brave and deal with their grief. It may not be for a few years but being terminally ill brings the reality of it home to you at such events.
Our summer holiday itiniary went totally wrong but I still managed to get to london for a week sight seeing with the boys and we attended the paralympics and saw some incredible athletes.
Just before the boys went back to school I saw my oncologist who said my cancer has spread through my lymph nodes from my neck on both sides down behind my lungs and to my lower abdomen. Still contained in my lymphatic system and not affecting any major organs as yet so that is good. Also my ca 125 has only risen by 80 to 575 since March (I thought it was going to be up to over 1,000 by now) so mixed results.
I start Topetecan on 1st October so fingers crossed with that. I will then have other options after that and he said caelyx should be available again from next year.
Next week I am having another port a cath put in so fingers crossed it doesn't all go wrong again.
Anyway on a brighter note the picture above is of my new beagle puppy, Alfie. He is 11 weeks old and full of fun and mischief. My husband brought him for me to help me get over Oscar. Lovely thought but I will never get over Oscar as he was such a special dog and we had such a close bond but I am sure with time Alfie and I will get a close bond as well. He is very cute and cuddly!
I am also going to drive a hovercraft with my husband next week just before starting treatment again so that should be fun. Hopefully I am coming back from that dark place and my fighting spirit will keep me going and dealing with whatever is thrown
I have so many plans for the coming weeks I hope I tolerate Topetecan as well as I have the other chemos and can continue working throughout with my childminding. Plus I will need my energy to train my puppy.
love and hugs to you all Jackie xxxxx