Totally Gutted!!: I asked my CNS nurse to let me... - My Ovacome

My Ovacome

18,284 members20,398 posts

Totally Gutted!!

61 Replies

I asked my CNS nurse to let me know my latest CA125, she rang today and sadly it has risen from 102 in March to 402 today, my CTscan shows a "few abnormalities", but she wouldn't go into details. My appointment has been changed from seeing a Registrar to seeing my Oncologist. She said I have a few options that need to be discussed. As you can imagine I am absolutely devastated. My CA125 has never gone below 38 even after de-bulking and chemo so I guess it was only to be expected, but I was sort of hoping that my CA125 was high due to my Rheumatoid Arthritis, or infection and that my scan would remain NED, but its not to be. I dont know what a "few abnormalities", means exactly but it doesn't sound good. Somehow between now and next Wednesday I have to find some courage to start treatment all over again, just feeling very weak and vulnerable at the moment.

Read more about...
61 Replies
Lizz49 profile image
Lizz49

So sorry Lyn to hear your news, I can totally understand how gutted you must be feeling right now and I really feel for you. I’m sure once you get your head around it and get your fighting spirit back you’ll face the chemo again with gusto like you did last time, and maybe a different type of regime will be what’s needed to keep the beast in check and give you a very long remission.

Nothing more to say except I’m sending you tons of virtual hugs and positivity for the next treatment, take care,

Liz Xx 💖

in reply toLizz49

Thank you Liz trying to stay positive and upbeat but its so hard! xx

Lyndy profile image
Lyndy

Hi Lyn1987... not the news you wanted I know. I also have Rheumatoid disease and I do think the inflammatory nature of this interferes with the ca 125.

Try not to panic- ‘abnormalities’ are common on post first line scans- particularly if you have a radiographer determined to report every bump or tiny shadow.

If you have no symptoms then it may well be suggested that you go on watch and wait. Even if it is a recurrence, you have choices, you could look into a trial or another surgery. Take your time. Best of luck xx

in reply toLyndy

Thank you Lyndy, the waiting to find out my CTscan results will probably kill me before any old cancer. Just feel like running away to hide. 😢

Lyndy profile image
Lyndy in reply to

I know...we deal with such enormous ups and downs on this journey...maybe you should hide for the weekend?! xx

Lindaura profile image
Lindaura

Dear Lyn,

I totally understand what you are going through.

Same thing happened to me after 6 months from first line. I felt so great,

I expected to hear that my CA-125 had dropped to 3. Instead it went from 11 to 69 and 6 weeks later after my scan, it was 473.

And lesions showed up on the scan.

We started Carbo/ Caelyx right away and except for the first week after infusion, it was a breeze and my CA-125 is now 15.

I just finished and have been on Niraparib for the last month.

I hope it keeps the beast at bay, because I find it totally refreshing and feel better than ever.

So, do not hesitate.

Hop on the Chemo train and give the beast what it deserves!

Hugs,

Laura

in reply toLindaura

Thank you Laura, I had very bad Neuropathy in both feet after 4th chemo cycle, they stopped taxol, but I am still suffering 5 months later. So nervous of starting again. But I realise that if it is a recurrence I will only get a parb if I undergo another chemo cycle. I was hoping for Niraparib eventually, but at the moment feel caught between the rock and a hard place.

Lindaura profile image
Lindaura in reply to

It is usually Carboplatin and Caelyx for first recurrence and if you respond well, you are eligible for Niraparib afterwards.

I wish you the best of luck on this.

Hugs,

Laura

Birdsong222 profile image
Birdsong222

Lyn the others have given good advice, but l totally know that feeling of wanting to run away! Mine came back after 9 months. We ladies do what needs to be done, sometimes with a heavy heart and a fear for our future. Once you truly understand what your facing and a plan is in place, you'll wear your old armour and deal with it all head on. Good luck and be thinking of you.

Sylvia x

in reply toBirdsong222

Hello Sylvia - Thank you. xx

Manchesterlady profile image
Manchesterlady

Oh Lyn, I’m so sorry to here this , I sometimes think they don’t understand the agony of waiting causes us all . I’m sure you will feel better when you know exactly what your up against. Are you at the Christie? I went for my blood test today and am seeing the prof. On Monday, so I understand how you feeling. Good luck .

Sheila xxx

in reply toManchesterlady

Hello Sheila - I am in the south and under the Marsden and to date have received excellent care which I am sure will continue, but it doesn't stop me worrying. Wishing you all the very best for your test results on Monday. Take Care xx

Eriksendi profile image
Eriksendi

So sorry to hear your ca125 has risen. I am in the south too but being treated at the Royal Surrey. I hope you will soon have a new treatment plan and sending you lots of love and courage x x

in reply toEriksendi

Thank you 💕

Caroles1 profile image
Caroles1

Hi hunny,

You can do it!, whatever they throw at you, it is in your best interests and they know what they are doing.

We have all been in the low place, but seriously, the only way is up.

The waiting is the most difficult, but try and occupy yourself, get the family round, have a spa day, do some knitting, anything you like and enjoy doing.

Let us know how you get on, I’m sure you will be fine,

Carole xx

in reply toCaroles1

Hi Carol - Thank you I will try to keep busy, but my mind has gone into overdrive and I can't switch off the worrying.

Coldethyl profile image
Coldethyl

Sorry to hear your rubbish news - it is so hard to keep picking ourselves up again and again - I think most of us are realistic about the nature of this disease but it’s only natural that we hope rising markers are down to other things - hopefully you can distract yourself between now and next week until you see the oncologist - once you know the details and have a plan things may seem more manageable - wishing you well x

in reply toColdethyl

Thank you 💕

Seasun36-uk profile image
Seasun36-uk

Sending love & courage for the next hurdle. You will fly over it Lyn xoxo

in reply toSeasun36-uk

Thank you 💕

Petrolhead profile image
Petrolhead

So hard to start again. I hope that your meeting with your oncologist is not as bad as you expect.

Best wishes

Fay

in reply toPetrolhead

Thank you 💕

shortfriend profile image
shortfriend

Hi Lyn sorry to hear your news no wonder you are low. Take heart at the people in this forum who have been through this and made good progress. I hope you can focus on positive thoughts before your meeting next week, and remember we will all be thinking of you so let us know how you get on. Wishing you good luck and best wishes for your meeting.

Pat xx

in reply toshortfriend

Thank you 💕

gmc920 profile image
gmc920

Sending hugs and support. Waiting is so hard, but they will have a plan to deal with this!

xx Gina

in reply togmc920

Thank you 💕

Maus123 profile image
Maus123

Argh, sorry Lyn. But as others said.. there might be lots of options, maybe not even chemo? My scans always showed one thing or the other, and my ca125 rose slowly. Still I went on watch and wait for over 2 years, and sometimes what showed up on the scan at one time wasn't visible anymore 3 months later. Best of luck with the appointment! Xx. Maus

in reply toMaus123

Thank you 💕

Nstober profile image
Nstober

Hi Lyn am so sorry to read this about your latest ca 125. This just happened to my sister. She made it almost a year cancer free was doing great and feeling great. Her ca 125 went from 9 to 13 in March to 32 this month. Scan ordered and yep several new spots scattered in abdominal area. Once we got over the dread we put our warrior hats on. She will start carbo and doxil next week. Ca 125 each time tested and new scan after 3 rounds. Her infusion is every 4 weeks. We look at it as her doctor has been on top of things, caught earlier this time and she is in great shape much better than at initial diagnosis. It still just stinks so much we have realized now this has to be treated as a chronic disease. We send you tons of hugs and best wishes from the states. Nancy

in reply toNstober

Thank you 💕

delia2 profile image
delia2

I’m so sorry to hear your news and I empathize about the neuropathy. I think you should push hard to get a treatment that doesn’t cause neuropathy. I hope there are some. Maybe the CT scan abnormalities aren’t cancer. I had an enlarged lymph node on CT but PET scan showed it wasn’t cancer. Good luck with everything. Xx

in reply todelia2

Thank you 💕

Katmal-UK profile image
Katmal-UK

Oh lyn, so sorry you are facing more chemo, know

how devastating that is and how vunerable you are feeling but you can do this. Please let us know what happens at your meeting. We arehere for you, Kathy xx

in reply toKatmal-UK

Thank you 💕

Lizchips profile image
Lizchips

Don't get discouraged, were there's a will there's always a way. Keep up the good fight. Ask if your a candidate for intraperitinel chemotherapy. It extends reoccurance time to up to 3 yrs . I also say I was gutted, my mom hates that term. But that's what was done. Stay strong. ❤❤Liz

in reply toLizchips

Thank you 💕

Spirit22 profile image
Spirit22

Dear Lyn so sorry to hear your news. Thinking of you, the waiting is so hard. Stay strong, sending hugs xx Lesley

in reply toSpirit22

Thank you 💕

TudorPurr68 profile image
TudorPurr68

Dear Lyn. I am so sorry you are at this frightening place once more. I offer my heartfelt love to you with hugs. Wishing you a full recovery - Tudor Xx

in reply toTudorPurr68

Thank you 💕

JayGeeCee profile image
JayGeeCee

Lyn I’m so sorry to hear about the potential recurrence. You can do this. Sending you a hug

Joy x

in reply toJayGeeCee

Thank you 💕

annieH1 profile image
annieH1

Hi Lyn,it's a total bummer when we hear CA125 risen plus abnormalities.Personally,I reckon at this stage my insides are totally abnormal and if I got an NED result ,I'd be worried!! There are so many treatment options available now outside of Chemo so,maybe your consultant will discuss those with you or you bring the subject into conversation.Unfortunately ,we can't put our Cancer in to an envelope and post it back,so,like you,our treatment must include positivity,strength,hope and courage.Abnormalities might mean seedlings or inflammation .xx

in reply toannieH1

Thank you 💕

Travelmonster profile image
Travelmonster

My thoughts are with you, it can be a tough journey at times.

Much love xxxx

in reply toTravelmonster

Thank you 💕

juliamillen profile image
juliamillen

Sorry to hear your news but pleased to learn you are being treated at The Marsden. You are in excellent hands.

in reply tojuliamillen

Thank you 💕

Maxjor profile image
Maxjor

So sorry Lyn--not the news you wanted for sure. I am living my second relapse and hate to say I have experience but finding out has been more devastating to me than after I get used to the idea and know it will be treated. Wrapping your head around it is step 1 and you have some time to get used to it. Step 2 is when you get your ducks in a row about fighting those abnormalities. (I think doctors call anything out of the ordinary "abnormalities" so my guess is they just mean its not NED and its due to those....I would not think anything more sinister). Please keep us posted and good luck. oxoxo Judy

in reply toMaxjor

Thank you 💕 I think it is the raised CA125 that is freaking me out. It has quadrupled in 11 weeks. 😢

tara108 profile image
tara108

Hi Lyn. Just saw this. Everything wot everyone else said, plus big hugs from me. Do let us know and hoping for the best for you.

in reply totara108

Thank you 💕

Mptelesca profile image
Mptelesca

Dear Lyn...I know exactly how you feel. The initial shock just kicks you down. You have been through this before, so, you know that you are in good hands. I hate getting the news over the phone because it just sends me into orbit. Abnormalities can mean inflamed lymph nodes. You said you have RA and an infection. Perhaps that was the cause. Just hang in there (easier said than done) and go in and talk to your onc. Praying and sending you hugs.

XOX

Marisa

in reply toMptelesca

Thank you 💕

marylondon profile image
marylondon

Really sorry to hear your news so soon after your wonderful cruise .

I hope your successful holiday will sustain you to tackle whatever treatment is offered . You can do it !

Mary 💐

in reply tomarylondon

Thank you 💕

Coutance profile image
Coutance

Lynn, I was just so, so sorry to read your post. I can empathise with how you feel as I was in an identical situation this time last year. I was completely devastated, in many ways I found it worse than when I was diagnosed. Like you, my first line chemo and de-bulking had gone extremely well and as soon as I finished as was accepted for a trial for niraparib, so felt really optimistic and positive. My CA125 started to rise only 2 months after my last chemo and some new disease was found in my pleura at the 3 month scan. On the advise of my oncologist I opted for 'watch & wait' and was put onto letrozole - he wanted me to have a break from chemo before more treatment. The letrozole stabilised my CA125 but I had a pleural effusion in July and then again in November, it was at this point that my oncologist felt that new treatment should begin - weekly taxol with fortnightly Avastin. I don't regret the 'watch & wait' as it enabled me to get my head around what had happened to me and come to terms with it - for me, this was really important. I also had a reasonable summer, doing nice things and going away on holiday. I started the new treatment at the beginning of December and, touching everything, it is going really well at the moment and my oncologist is delighted. It is a very doable regime and I am able to enjoy a fairly normal life, including taking a week off occasionally to have a holiday. Sorry about the long post but I just felt so much for you and will be thinking about you until I hear more news after your appointment on Wednesday. Jx

in reply toCoutance

Thank you 💕 I am glad to hear you have a treatment plan that is working well, long may it continue. My Oncologist appointment can't come soon enough and if treatment is needed they come up with a good plan for me also. Take Care xx

Lockygill profile image
Lockygill in reply to

Yes. It’s good if you can put your trust in the medical people who know what to do. I trust that my oncologist will endeavour to do all she can to get my treatment right. Good luck x

Natsmb profile image
Natsmb

I am so sorry you have received this news. Definitely gutting. Hugs. I will say a quick prayer for wisdom and how to move forward whatever the situation turns out to be.

in reply toNatsmb

Thank you 💕

Not what you're looking for?

You may also like...

Gutted

Good morning ladies. I hope you are all as well as can be in these uncertain times. I had a phone...

Mum's latest Oncologist meeting 🙄

My mum last saw her consultant on the 7th Feb to discuss her first scan following the end of her...
sjg81 profile image

Gutted...

I'm waiting to have a restaging scan before my next lot of chemo on the 30th. Had to stop it before...
ricky23 profile image

Gutted!!

Had my last chemo for stage 4 PPC Feb 2015 my last Avastin Dec 2015. Slight rise in ca125 in Feb...
Emalou71 profile image

Post First Line Consultation Today

Saw consultant Today for post First line treatment (actually she was the surgeon who did my...
kazrazmataz profile image

Moderation team

See all

Top community tags

Content on HealthUnlocked does not replace the relationship between you and doctors or other healthcare professionals nor the advice you receive from them.

Never delay seeking advice or dialling emergency services because of something that you have read on HealthUnlocked.