Ive got to say I don't write on here very often but do read the posts. !! I actually feel a bit guilty as I only have 1c ovarian cancer and so many of you have so much to deal with. But if possible could I ask for some advice... I was diagnosed kast year. Doing well but just lately I am so tired I usually walk for an hour every night eith my hubby and dog snd love it but in the past week I am exhusted and feel sick while walking. I had a scan ladt thurs intetnal as well and all ok. My ca levels have risen the last 2 times but only by 2 or 3 so thats not a concern. I think im not the only one waiting for axe to fall and dont really know my prognosis... my doctor says I am doing well. But im having awful sweats and he said I can gave hrt patch but very low dose but would rather I didnt as its not good with Ovarian cancer. Sage ive heard is good for sweats... has snyone tried this? Has anyone gone ahead with Hrt? Ive put loads of weight on. But I also lost my mum after I was diagnosed and do feel down as naturally miss her so much. Is this tiredness notmal... is it just that i am going through the menopause and a symptom of that!! I am 53 and did not have Chemo (my choice) Also I constantly ache my feet when I get up and generally feel old!! Im sure as I type this its just the Menopause!! Thank you ladies and best wishes to you all.... you are an amazing bunch xxxxx
Feel guilty....: Ive got to say I don't write on... - My Ovacome
Feel guilty....
Hi Ricky,
You should never feel guilty, we are all in this together, I am sorry I can't help you with you question, but it won't hurt to go and have a check up, (better to be safe than sorry)
Sending you love and best wishes x G x
Thank you Gwyn. I see my doctor in December. So hope I get the answers to a few questions but hate to be a nuisance really I always feel im a pain... mainly because of the guilt of turning down the Chemo I feel I have no right to moan!! Hope you are kerping well? X
Hi, could you be suffering with depression. You've had an awful lot to cope with this last year, and although some women sail through the menopause, some don't, and it can trigger depression in some women. Putting on weight and nights sweats are all related to the menopause and anxiety and stress make the sweats worse. I've noticed this myself and was talking to someone else recently who said the same. Losing your mum must have also hit you hard and you're probably missing her more than if ever if you're feeling so down. Maybe a visit to see your GP to see if you are suffering from depression might help and possibly even some counselling to help you with the guilt you're feeling at turning down chemo. You certainly shouldn't be feeling guilty about this, it's your body and you made the decision that was right for you. Take care and please stop being so hard on yourself, love Kerry x x x
Hi there
Please don't feel guilty , people with Stage 4 cancer may never see a recurrence and people with borderline , like mine sometimes do.
You have had an awful lot to deal with , this diagnosis , loosing your mum , big surgery , dealing with uncertainty, the menopause etc. I went through a bad patch after being diagnosed but time really is a great healer and now nearly 4 years on I am fine.
If you have bad menopausal symptoms and your doctor says that hrt it is ok then why not give it a little go for a bit. My consultant is adamant that HRT is fine for me ,in any case I had such bad symptoms even in hospital that I am not sure that I could have done without it. As for refusing chemo , it's your body and your life .....you are not in jail ..and even if you were nobody can force you to do anything you don't want to do. I remember you posting why you didn't want chemo...this is a perfectly valid reason......poor thing .
I sadly have a number of friends who have had cancer and all say that the first year after treatment finishes is really rough.
I do hope you feel better soon....do have a chat with your gp.
Love and big hugs xxxxxxxx
Oh my goodness so much wonderful concern and guidence. Thank you so very much all of you. I do think I am depressed but feel its to be expected eith everything. I do tend to not tell anyone how I feel as like I said I feel embarrassed and stupid for not having Chemo. But there are very good reasons. ... long silly story ( in my eyes) I do think I have no rights to complain or ask questions!! Its sounds ridiculous as I write it but its how I feel. I need to sort my head out I think and try to stop feeling like me and my cancer dont count because of my decision. I have never asked what my future may be!! All I remember being told was that having Chemo would give me 10 to 13% more chance.... Thank you all so so much. Given me a lot to think about. Xxxx Ps I really really miss my mum don't think its realky hit me yet. Did have counselling before my op though x
Hi there, I do know exactly what you mean, I had 1a stage 1 and I sometimes feel embarrased asking questions but the thing that my specialist nurse told me was that although the stage & grade is excellent in terms of OC - the shock of the diagnosis and all the fears are just the same, so I keep trying to let myself of the hook lol. I experienced feeling tired right up to at least 18months after the hysterectomy - some days I could walk with the dogs for miles then some days I couldnt make it down the drive, so were I probably thing it is just par of the course, I dont think it costs anything to mention it to your doc. It is a lot to cope with a major operation, loss of a parent, menopause, so you seem to be doing really good facing all that. I rang my Macmillan nurse recently after I felt the A&E had not taken the diagnosis of OC seriously enough and sent me home after a bleed, she totally agreed and booked me in to see my oncologist next week, so dont be afraid to put yourself forward xxxxxxxxxx
Hi, Ricky.
I know just how you feel! I was diagnosed 2 years ago - got confirmation that it was cancer (stage 1A) exactly 2 years ago today - and lost my mum just under a year ago. There are times when it just gets overwhelming! Are you by any chance around the anniversary of your diagnosis? I find that anniversaries tend to bring the emotions I felt at the time flooding back. I so wish that Mum were still here - I miss her love and reassurance, even though she was already so ill when I was diagnosed that we never told her.
I have had times when I have felt really exhausted too, not helped by the osteoarthritis in my knees, I have to say! Do remember that your core muscles have been severely damaged by your operation - my surgeon said to expect to take a good two years to get anything like back to normal, and I know my core muscles are still weak, two years later. That means that things like long walks can be very exhausting, though good for you!
It might be worth seeing if your GP can refer you to a local gym. I have found that a help, though cut back for a few months because of my knees. (I'm paying for that now!) That way you would get personal advice on what exercise is best for you, and it's cheaper than the going rate, too.
And yes, I've had (and still have) hot flushes and sweats. I haven't tried HRT - haven't dared! They are not as bad now as they were a year ago, I don't think, so time probably does help.
As for generally feeling stiff in the mornings, unfortunately having had cancer doesn't give us a get out of jail free card as far as other ailments go, and stiffness does tend to come with increasing age. I suppose it's a sign that we are normal, in its own way, though that kind of normality I could happily live without!
Don't blame yourself for having all these doubts and fears. They go with the territory. Yes, we've been lucky that our cancers were caught early, but that won't stop us worrying at times anyway! Hopefully your consultant will be able to help put your fears at rest at least temporarily when you have your next check up.
Hugs, and hope you are feeling happier soon,
Barbara
You have a lot on your plate and, as you have said, there's lots of good advice above. I was around your age when I was diagnosed, but I was 3c, because of lymph node involvement. I didn't take anti-depressants, but I know they help some women with OC. I think sage is classed as a phytoestroegen - in other words, it mimics the action of female hormones in the body, and if it does that, it is doing the same thing as HRT, but on a smaller scale. I took a highly complex supplement full of similar things, e.g. black cohosh & sage, before I was diagnosed and I often wonder if that supplement had anything to do with the cancer.
There are various ways of treating night sweats that do not involve hormones that you can get I think from any GP. It might be worth ringing your CNS (if you have one) and asking her for suggestions, and perhaps discussing your other worries as well. You are entitled to counselling, which you can get from your GP or the hospital that treated you.
We are all on the same treadmill - I know of women who have survived for 20 plus years, and they still have checkups every 6 months or annually, and they still fret beforehand. It is a roller coaster, not a journey, as someone else said on the site a few days ago.
Please take good care of yourself and keep in touch. Best Vxxx
Hello, If it's any consolation I feel exactly the same, 'only' stage 1 and refused more chemo after having first two under pressure from family/friends. I've gained 2 and a half stone, have hot flushes all night so I am exhausted the whole time, and I ache all over. I tell everybody I'm fine because I feel guilty about feeling so fed up and tired when so many ladies on here are suffering so much more. It also makes me feel more positive. I take an anti inflammatory most days which helps a lot with the aches and pains and there may also be some evidence it can help prevent recurrence. (read DrDu's posts). Please be very careful about taking any natural HRT remedies as OC can be oestrogen dependent. I'm sure if we could just get a night's sleep and didn't have to work so hard we'd feel better. Thanks for posting, you've made me feel much less guilty and alone. Stay in touch. Love Dawn xxx
H, I think some of your tiredness may be caused by depression, I lost my dad just before I was diagnosed then I went through going backwards & forwards to GP before being sent for ultrasound. As soon as I'd had ultra sound everything went really quickly I had a very large tumour removed, appendix, omentum, lymph nodes removed & a chemo wash. After being told that things were probably going to be a lot worse than that I was relieved to be told I had 1C & wouldn't have to have chemo. I still haven't recovered properly as it all seemed to hit me after & I know I have been depressed for a while.I like you don't like to post as reading other posts I know I'm one of the luckier ones. I live alone & everyone thinks I'm a really strong person as I have suffered from another illness from being in my early teens. I am most of the time but sometimes I feel really down, I told my doctor & she suggested seeing a councillor which has really helped me. Ask your GP if you can get to see a councillor, I've realised my Dad's death probably effected my more than having OC which seems to just have made it worse & dented my confidence. I hope you start to feel better soon, I thought I would never feel right again.I'm 51 & I've had no HRT as GP said it was not good but the sweats have virtually gone now.
Good Luck Sue.
Forgot to mention the weight gain seems to come with OC I'm trying in vain to get rid of mine. It certainly went on a lot quicker than it's coming off. I'm going to Macmillian for check up next week & I'm already starting to get stressed about it but I think everyone does. Don't beat yourself up about it you've been through a terrible time & it takes time to recover I'm glad I've finally realised this instead of trying to carry on as if everything is the same as it was before & blaming myself for not getting straight back into my stride straight away. Sue xx
Don't feel guilty you have had a very stressful time and I think if I had been in your position I would have refused chemo as well.
Lots of other things could be causing your symptoms when walking. I had something similar and found out I had gallstones.
Some antidepressants can be prescribed for the treatment of hot flushes
Never feel guilty my dear! Be thankful! I never had hot sweats during the menopause but I get them now. I haven't found any way to cure them. See your doctor earlier if you are worried!
Margaret
Hi Ricky
You have nothing at all to feel guilty about its taken 10 months for me to get my mojo back after my hysterectomy and chemo and even then the sweats get pesky sometimes. You have beenthrough so much be kind to yourself and banish any guilty feelings ! its only natural to feel the way you have been feeiing and it sounds as though you have coped so well.
Very best wishes
Fiona
Xxxx
As everyone has said above......don't feel guilty!!!! I have been attending acupuncture for sweats at my local day hospice. This was suggested by someone who had under gone treatment for breast cancer. She had gone through the treatment well but became very low in mood afterwards.I do think it has helped although I still get sweats but it may be worth considering Ricky?! Some respond extremely well! Chin up ♡♡ Love Wendy xxx
Hi Ricky. Never feel guilty - any stage of OC is worrying. Never feel it too much trouble to ask for help from the medics, that's what they are there for, to talk to and discuss concerns. Write down all your questions, that way you won't forget any. The ladies have all given good tips and advice, take them on board. Wishing you well, love n hugs Izzy xxxx
I really feel for you. Mine was a somewhat similar case to yours, except that I was 80 when diagnosed Now two years on, I have the exhaustion, sweats, aches etc. but not the guilt, I am still here. I just feel lucky. I am thinking how bad it could have been. This is a wonderful site with all the support of those much worse off than me - and they still come up smiling, and caring. Be kind to yourself - you have been brave. I will hope for you. Love and hugs.
I would like to know more about the lady magnet you spoke of. I was put on an estrogen patch but did not like it because of the severe joint and muscle pain it created at night. I am just looking for relief from night sweats.
Hi to ALL you Amazing Wonderful and So kind ladies. I am stunned at so many replies and all the advice given... but more so the amazing stories you have shared with me!! Some do parallel my own story. I am in awe of you ALL. I am reading and rereading your stories and comments. I have gained strengh from you all. It is about time I stopped thinking my cancer is not important snd to also stop being guilty because I refused Chemo... I dont think I should be less of a person because of my decision. Im not sure if the grading is hugely significant mine is 3 and im told it is bad but I thought the staging was far more significant? Because I dont ask questions I hardly know anything!! I do need to address the loss of my mum and think you are right re counselling. Im glad that these aches and pains are to be expected!! I am going to carry on eith my walking as I love it!! I have also been diagnosed with early Osteoporosis. .. this is what my mum had and finally killed her... she died an awful awful death. I was with her day and night until she passed away. I now have tablets to help. I will go to see my GP... who is very good. THANK YOU ALL SO VERY VERY VERY MUCH. You have been so supportive even though you all have your problems too. Xxxxxxxxx
XX love G
Hi. You've had loads of good advice. I would just add, see if you can find a beginners yoga class. I think you'd find it really helps with the stiffness. If it's the soles of your feet that are painful it could plantar fasciitis. A podiatrist could confirm this by doing gait analysis and would give you exercises to help with that too.
Best wishes
Linda
Thank you... funnily enough a friend of mine suggested Yoga. But I thought I was too far gone with all the aches and pains ha ha!! But will now look into it. Yes the soles of my feet do hurt even after sitting for 5 mins... I hobble a lot!!! X
I was pretty debilitated after my surgery and chemo for stage 1a but getting moving and building it up gradually really worked and I now work out about 3 times a week and feel really well. You're much too young to sit down and give up. Good luck.
I am not sure why you did not take the chemo as it is recommended for 1C as I am.It takes a while to get over the tiredness. I am now 4 years post op and working full time 6 weeks after my last chemo.So just keep on going.
Hi there...I was really sad to hear that you're feeling low. I'm about the same age as you and lost my parents in 2000. I miss them very much still and I think it's very hard to be ill and not have them alongside. Sending you my very best good wishes... Love Tina x x
Hi. It is very hard without your parents especially a mum when your ill. Mine knew I had cancer but died within 6 months sadly. For 6 days and nights I stayed with her I slept on the bed with her... I had just one night where I cuddled her and talked to her she was wide awake but couldnt speak. We both looked at each other she stoked my face and cried... it was then that I knew it was a goodbye.. mums eh they are wonderful. !! I need to get a grip and realise I have cancer because I never admit it and feel embarrassed when people find out and say Are you mad or selfish not having Chemo? I then feel a fraud.. Thank you all for the tremendous kind support and words. Means a lot. From all your lovely comments I can see no one is the same we all walk down different paths but it has been a great relief to be able to explain how I am feeling. I hate to shout anything from the roof tops... im too quiet I think!! Xxxx
Sorry to hear that you are feeling low. You have had lots to deal with and sudden menopause on top. Maybe think about discussing it with the hospital and GP to put your mind at rest and see if anything cause be offered to help .take care and I hope it gets easier , dy xxx
Dear Ricky
Please don't ever feel guilty for posting. I always think it must be awful having a diagnosis of an early stage cancer and not knowing what will happen and that's bound to wear you down.
As the others have said, you've had such a lot on your plate this year. I'm guessing some of the problems with tiredness and sweats are related to the menopause which can be really tough for some women. My GP didn't recommend HRT - not because I had ovarian cancer at the time - but he said that it just delays the symptoms so best if you can just struggle through.
I lost my Dad the same month as being diagnosed. I know just how devastating that is. Believe me time does heal but somehow when it's so closely linked with such another devastating blow as a diagnosis of cancer.
Don't worry about putting on weight for the moment. I put on a stone which made me feel rotten until I just bought some different clothes and now I've stopped worrying about it I'm now gradually going back to the weight I was. Wait until you're ready to deal with it or it will just make you even more miserable. Hopefully the worst of the symptoms of the menopause will soon be passing and you'll feel much fitter for it.
I hope some of the suggestions for supplements or appliances might help. Sometimes a good holiday or treat does the trick in the midst of winter.
Love to you. xxx Annie
There is nothing much I can add to all the very helpful advice already given, except for one thing - I saw my oncologist last week and he advised me not to have soya due to it's oestrogen content, and also, as V says, no sage, for the same reason.
Do hope things will soon improve for you - you've been through an awful lot, so be kind to yourself.
Jill xx
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