Ugh. It has been a difficult day only because I'm trying to be tough again and not chew the gum. This afternoon I asked myself why I was choosing to suffer through withdrawal symptoms at a time when withdrawal symptoms are the last thing I need. Then I told myself that was the nicotine addiction talking, and then I told myself to shut up. Who cares.
The whole point to my quitting the way I have is because I cannot handle breaking the smoking habit AND the nicotine addiction at the same time. I promised myself I'd use the gum, so I'd better hold to that promise. I had one piece yesterday, and two so far today, so it's not even like I'm using it that much.
I did not once today think 'I need a smoke' or even 'I want a smoke' so that in itself is something to celebrate. The habit of it is passing. I am still thinking about smoking in general, so that's not brilliant but I expect that will continue for a while. It really is a drastic change, isn't it, to go from lighting up twelve to fifteen times a day to not lighting up at all. I am trying to be kind to myself. I have eaten every apple in the house and walked the dog three times.
The whole thing IS getting easier. And harder, which is weird. I have not wavered, nor will I, but is nice to be able to come here and know there are people who have done this before me and are doing it right now. Onwards.