Injecting some positivity!

I haven't done 'annoyingly bouncy' for ages, have I?!

Well, here goes. I was feeling a bit down on myself. Though I don't get 'proper' painful, all-consuming cravings any more, I do get occasional (sometimes daily, sometimes none for a week or so) thoughts a bit like a wicked little giggle from the inner stroppy teenager that says 'Go on, you could have a smoke, or maybe even two. Maybe just smoke for a day! You *could*! It wouldn't hurt or undo all your work, because you've shown how strong you can be...go on, go on, GO AHHHHN!' (The rascally teenager tends to go a bit Mrs Doyle here, for Father Ted fans...) At which point, I slap her and turn away. That shows her.

But eventually this was starting to make me quite cross with myself.

And I tried to lock it away. Then I realised that doesn't work, so I had a proper look at it instead.

I had to smile, really. I'm getting cross, about thoughts that I can so easily slap away? And yet I'm not remembering to celebrate the fact that I NEVER (yes, really, never) get the urge to smoke first thing in the morning, or after dinner, or on the way home from work, or that 'just the one before I go to bed' that I always thought were the hardest triggers to overcome?

AnnMarie, you're right, we have to remember to celebrate and pat ourselves on the back! I'm STILL not smoking at least 15 fags every day. That's BRILLIANT! So far, since I quit, I haven't smoked ONE THOUSAND NINE HUNDRED AND EIGHTY EIGHT fags! That's nearly TWO thousand fags that won't be doing me any damage at all! Eat that, nicoteenager!

:D

3 Replies

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  • Incy Wincy, This is a great post, made me giggle and I could sure relate to it. Let's keep up the fight together, you know, strength in numbers right? Your 2k fags are a big number, good for you, really good for you.

  • Hi Incy

    Made me giggle too. I hope next time I get the go awwwwwn moment I remember this and can laugh it away. Doesn't happen much but man when it does it's still quite strong. Thanks for sharing because sometimes it helps to know others still getting an ugly head popping up from time to time. I've kind of refocused to ensure I stay positive though as I honestly think i was in a danger zone last weekend and subtle thoughts of missing something to support me were creeping in. Today I laugh missing what!!! Smell, cough, slavery, stained teeth, wheezing ha ha haaaaaaaaaha oh how our brains love a little trickery x

  • Made me simle incy!

    "Eat that, nicoteenager!" - Had me literally laughing out loud.

    Stay strong!

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