I have had an absolute craaaap day today. in this order-
1) rowdy neighbours:mad:
2) my daughters birthday cant happen (insert steam from my ears here)and therefore is no more so will have a very upset wee girl on my hands. shes away at the moment so im trying to think of something that will replace said party!
3) everything else from unexpected bills, things not being delivered, stuff breaking, lol, you know those days where one thing is literally happening after the other? like a stack of dominoes it all went downhill after number 1)
now in the grand scheme of things this is the type of stuff id normally say no big deal (normally whilst im puffing on a fag while I think of next steps) but I cant seem to bat it off!
I DO NOT want to smoke. its again not an option but im certainly missing that outlet today. This is when I would smoke so I could sort out everything in my mind and as soon that ciggie was extinguished id know exactly what to do (load of rubbish, I know it did nothing of the sort). Its where I would grab 5 minutes outside on my lonesome creating magnificent plans. obviously I can do that without smoking ive done it for the last 6 weeks. but the old 'one will make today easier' is right there and it is constant.
I have now dragged my sorry self to my bed where I will eat chocolate, watch a soppy film and cry into my pillow like a teeneager experiencing their first heartbreak and repeat until I get a grip of myself:cool:
aaaaaaahhhh that's better sorry for the rant,tomorrow is a new day and it will be blooming spectacular smoke free one too!