First the good news, it's 8 months tonight since I last smoked a real fag, it's the 2nd longest time since I was a 13 year old social smoker that I've gone without a fag!! Or more accurately over 4,846 of them :eek:
But unfortunately its not easy for me at the mo - hence why I haven't been around very much.
Have had some real struggles, the last week or so being the worst by a very long way It got loads worse last weekend, and really hit me hard - have got close to smoking but managed not to!!
Don't know why so many lovely people on here and who I know off the boards are happy in their quit, but I'm still stuck :/
All I can guess is that my mind is struggling to make the leap from "smoking is nice/naughty/makes you feel better" etc to what it really is. It's weird, on one hand I totally understand it stinks, costs a fortune, makes you ill etc, etc, but there's a bit of my brain that is still the same as when I smoked. Maybe as I've been either a smoker, a social smoker or quit but not wanting to be for the last 16 years i's just takin longer? But it's a pain in the bum!!
Only other thing I can think is because my quit was spur of the moment, rather than spending ages smoking and hating it, that I hadn't built up a big dislike of smoking?
Well, I won't smoke today, tomorrow can look after itself
Sorry for the emo!!