i have found today extremely difficult for some reason i had a good 8/9 days then old nic just popped up again i cant shake of the urge to smoke at all, i think i had money today i would have smoked but wisely at the biggin of my quiyt i decided when i get money to spend it all so that if i get the urge i cant afford to run out and get some fags, that was a blessin in disguise today, i havent struggled like i am tody in a while, i do have my inhalator but i havent used it in well over 2 weeks so i am not reducing to going back to nrt. sorry if this appears to be an essay but i figured typin isnt trying to get hold of a fag from somewhere. ive started to feel quit depressed over past day or 2 depression is meant to be a side effect isnt it? i thought i would have got over the side effects know as it has been over a month. soorry to rant i just dont knwo what else to do at the minute i really am finding today extremely difficult, if i wasnt so wound up i would just go to bed but i cant sleep when im wound up anyway so theres no point. i have drunken lots of water today eatten loads, havent been able to go out because its been raining heavy all day so couldnt take my boy out in it. ive baked cakes played game u name it ive done it i just cant shake the urge off any ideas are extremely welcome.