First and foremost gotta give a shout out for DAY 12 and all my peeps Whoo Hoo!!!!
Last night I was hanging out with the BF and we were watching a new movie called “Flight” with Denzel Washington (btw: not what I thought it was going to be but a good flick nonetheless imo) and I kept finding my attention wandering back to cigarettes, cigarettes, cigarettes!
It was as if somebody kept whispering in my ear… you want to smoke, you need a cigarette now and on and on. It was so distracting that I couldn’t concentrate on the damn movie. It was so strong that I decided to not try and shut it out but go into it and explore the thought. Aha, the epiphany was in the thinking…… hee hee!!
I started asking myself questions such as “is this something I need OR is this something I want?” two distinctly different things, wouldn’t you say? Of course the first thought is, both right? However in truth you know that the body does not need the cigarette at all, it will not cease to function if denied this thing. So it can’t be a need at all, it is just a want.
When my mind used the word “just” it suddenly wasn’t such a powerful thing anymore. Listen to it one more time…. It is “just” a want!!!!
As smokers we have taught ourselves to basically act as spoiled children, nothing more. We tell ourselves with respect to cigarettes, I want that, therefore I should have it. Our intense cravings are really nothing more than us throwing ourselves on the floor kicking and screaming in full on tantrum for something we think we should have because we think we need it and WE have decided it is something we want. When I thought of that visual I began to laugh, I thought how silly we must appear to non smokers. :eek:
Now having said all this I understand so much of this is also wrapped up in time and habits. I used this excuse myself all the time. The “I have smoked so long I don’t know what else to do BS” because that is really all it is. I am so tired of hearing myself use that phrase I’m just over it! So I guess to beat this thing you have to be someone who embraces change, and looks forward not backward.
Maybe thinking about being a smoker all the time keeps us in the past instead of living in the now. Next time you have a craving, ask yourself what you really want….. is it the smoke going into your lungs, poisoning your body, the smell wrapping itself around you, or that oh so satisfying slightly sore throat all the time. Are these the things you want? I bet every answer will be a no and the truth is you don’t really want to smoke at all, so embrace that craving and really go inside of it and challenge yourself to see the truth because it is in there waiting for you.
The truth is that we all have already won the battle, it has been fought and it’s over. It ended the day we quit. Acknowledge your victory and begin your new life you are already doing it. I now know that I will never smoke again and I can see any future cravings for what they are, the vestiges of a dead habit that belong in the past.
The future is already here