A sign of progress

Catching sight of people smoking has been a major challenge to me. It scares me that it might trigger me to go buy some fags............NOPE. This has been a major bother to me so far. (Probably one of the reasons I feel angry about Sian's situation with her smoking client)

However, today it changed (slightly). I caught sight of someone smoking and felt nothing. Later i saw a smoker and immediately felt pity for them. Wow. I still can't watch someone smoking without starting to feel concerned, yet just catching sight of them - and immediately looking away - is OK now.

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  • Absolutely with you 100% on this one mucker.

    I was even closing my eyes if I was watching a film and somebody started smoking!! How paranoid is that?!?

    I also didn't want to go anywhere near the smoking area in work for the same reason but I called in work today to pick some stuff up and I saw a customer who looked like he couldn't wait to get outside in the pi**ing rain to light up, think he did it on his first step outside the door! I actually felt sorry for him too, "having" to do that!

    Really glad you feel like you are getting somewhere Biggrin...really glad :D

    Nice one mucker, top man :D

    Greg

  • That is progress Biggrin, that is when things start to get a lot easier.:)

  • Good for you Biggrin, glad you are moving forward in your quit and your thoughts/feelings about it. I'm actually the opposite of you, seeing people smoking (and smelling it) actually puts me off and reinforces why I want to quit!

    We are all different though and reading this forum and everyone's thoughts and experiences have been invaluable to me when dealing with my own quit

  • You're ahead of me love, my mum smokes and it still bothers me to watch her.

    Maybe has more to do with the fact I think she'd quite like me to fail :(

    You're doing so well Biggrin. Really getting there x

  • Right from the beginning I made a decision not to avoid smoke and smokers.

    I didn't go out of my way to find them, but I continued to stand and chat with my smoking friends just like I always had.

    I used it to strengthen my resolve as I knew if I could do that I could quit for good.

    We are, however, all different. Whatever works for each individual is all that matters in the end.

    Just remember NOPE and that one is one too many.

    All of you guys and gals of the "new crop" of quitters are a sturdy, supportive and focused bunch and I'm sure that you'll all make the penthouse when you get to the one year mark. :D :cool:

  • Coming away from a primary school nativity several people in the crowd lit up, it wasn't pity or concern which struck. I was annoyed that they were subjecting the rest of us and our kids to the stink. It had probably been an hour and a half since their last smoke.

    When I 1st quit I noticed smokers everywhere but now I only notice them when I'm down wind of them.

  • Thanks for your replies. It's striking how our attitudes vary when it comes to encountering/spending time with smokers. Some like me want to steer clear, others want to immerse themselves in the experience - and each has good reasons for their approach!

    Nic - thanks for the encouraging comment that you now only notice smokers when down wind.

  • I live on the second floor of a two story apartment complex, and I have seven neighbors with sight of my balcony and/or front door.

    Guess how many of them smoke?

    If you said seven, you'd be right! Seven (or more, some have more than one person in their unit) smokers who mostly come outside to smoke to keep the smell out of their apartments.

    In the first few days/weeks, I had trouble even having my window open. But I had no choice in terms of encountering these people as I went about my business (heading to / from the car, mailbox, trash etc.)

    In my case, I think it helped that they were there, even though I couldn't stand it. I saw how ridiculous, silly, smelly, disgusting, and time consuming was their habit (just as mine had been).

    I'd see them standing out there in the rain, remembering how pitiful I was when I used to do the very same thing.

    I will say this: from Day One of my quit, seeing someone else smoking was never a trigger and never made me want one. It only made me sick to my stomach and/or feel pity for the poor, addicted people.

  • You're ahead of me love, my mum smokes and it still bothers me to watch her.

    Maybe has more to do with the fact I think she'd quite like me to fail :(

    You're doing so well Biggrin. Really getting there x

    Molly, I doubt that your mum wants you to fail. I bet she is so relieved that you have given up, she may feel bad that she is still smoking but,you are her precious daughter she wont want you to smoke I can assure you. xx

  • I saw how ridiculous, silly, smelly, disgusting, and time consuming was their habit (just as mine had been).

    I'd see them standing out there in the rain, remembering how pitiful I was when I used to do the very same thing.

    I will say this: from Day One of my quit, seeing someone else smoking was never a trigger and never made me want one. It only made me sick to my stomach and/or feel pity for the poor, addicted people.

    Interesting, I might try to see things this way when I next see someone smoking. Not what it's like to smoke, but what it's like to be a smoker.

  • Molly, I doubt that your mum wants you to fail. I bet she is so relieved that you have given up, she may feel bad that she is still smoking but,you are her precious daughter she wont want you to smoke I can assure you. xx

    You're right Hazel, that was an extremely unkind thing for me to say.

    I think she feels it now because she's the only one in the family who smokes.

    But she is very proud of me and I shouldn't have thought otherwise. It's good when someone pulls me up on being a silly mare! Thanks for that chuck :)

    Molly x

  • Smile - Anxiety is a confusing picture! I've certainly got stuff to be worried about. However, quitting complicates things, and I'm not sure how much of the anxiety is being generated by the quit - particularly physical sensations, like you mention.

    Have a happy Xmas and New Year yourself.

    Cheers

    Biggrin

  • I have had some anxiety since I quit. I used to be a great worrier but never had anxiety. Since I quit I have become much more laid back and I never seem to worry at all. I have learnt to change negative feelings to positive ones and also to think pleasant thoughts thanks to an app. Trouble is now I do get anxiety. I have to assume it is something to do with the chemicals in cigarettes.

  • moving on

    Thats really great Biggrin that you are making progress! It will be such a good way for you to start the new year, as a non smoker! Isnt is amazing that the smell can trigger such emotion.....................

    Take care

    Marie xxx

  • Hey Biggrin...onwards and upwards for you!!! Happy Days!!

    I was at the in laws the other night having a couple of beers with them - they both smoke and although I was sat on the floor watching the cigs go from ashtray to mouth and back again (kinda like a dog begging for chocolate but without the dribble and wet nose)..it didn't start me smoking again.

    I can't decide yet if it tempted me any or made me glad I have stopped...its kinda 50/50 at the moment but I am confident seeing people smoking wont sway me to start again so so far so good.

    Oh and I don't know if it will help any with your anxiety but I rub the bit of flesh between my finger and thumb on my hand and that helps me sometimes with my anxiety....just need to find myself a rubbing point for my temper ;)

    High Fives - lucy x

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