Panic!!!

[nsd_user663_51074]

D Well how is everyone ? lovely weekend ?

First of today since I stopped now going into my 7TH WEEK... I have the worst craving in the world, it’s so bad I’m fighting beyond fighting not to give in :mad:

Well, how it started was... I went to bed last night at around 10 after watching X Factor and spent the next hour debating as you do on Facebook what we thought ( and for the record I thought Rynal ) who gave the mother of all performances when told he was through was good singer but better than Sam as to be fair we don’t need another Cold Play wannabe do we ? Anyways when he told he was through, that outcry of emotion Jesus the last time I did exactly that I was in Costa Coffee and they put full fat milk not skimmed milk in my coffee, it was horrendous!

Anyways, I drifted off and heard and my fake housemate texted me with some important news.... now if you’re wondering what a fake housemate is... basically we both live in these fabulous old Victorian houses that been converted into 3 lovely little flats, I live on the second floor and she and her fiancé live on the 1st, we moved in 5 years ago and been inseparable since. and imagine my horror when I finally drag my ass out of bed to ring her back to bollock her (well insist as she woke me up her punishment was to pop up with a bottle of wine like she normally would) anyway the news was she is leaving for Dubai in 2 months, Jesus Christ I think I’m still in hell thinking about it.... the emotions, the stress the sheer pressure of the thought she is going is driving me insane!!! I’m very optimistic for her as you would be and I’m trying so hard to be happy and help her find a registry office ( don’t even go there ) and a pre honeymoon holiday next two weeks ( again don’t go there lol ) but in side I just want to die, to be fair this hurt more than when I got knocked over by a taxi on my night out, what happened there was I got out the cab and went to cross the road behind the cab waving at my friends in the pub, my partner was paying for the cab driver I swear who is still now sh1tting teeth, reversed into me, I mean how could you not see me ? I am not exactly a midget my partner heard a yelp one min I was there next min I was gone ) My friends never actually recovered from seeing their friend get knocked down I what they thought was the most campest / glamorous knock down they ever saw…. ( Cheeky B1tches ) I digress.....how the hell I have never had a fag is beyond me... maybe its god testing me ?

Now back to my events on the plus side, I have already claimed her £2000 bed ( I mean who the hell pays this much for a bed if it was me I would want a hot sales man in it for at least a month for that price ) and my flight is practically booked for February actually this was done before I said congrats! well you have to move forward don’t you ? If you can’t beat them join them I say! So tonight I am going straight downstairs when I get home and help her pack, she does not know it yet

So yes these are trying times in deed and one I am going to need all the strength in the world to get through this. I remember breaking up with my ex 2.5 years ago and I don’t remember it being as hard as this! This feels like my life and heart is being ripped out, I think maybe as I really never liked him much but that’s another story.

So as I sip my tea thinking my life without my little Angie downstairs. Oh God I just thought…. I can now have the perfect excuse to go and buy 2 I pads one for me and my partner to communicate with him and her whilst he is on long trips out the country and then for me to keep in touch with her and both and see each other, I know you can do this on Iphones and apple macs but I need a more convenient way of doing this!!!

Oh exciting ehh.. Actually, I’m over this sh1t I’m going to drag her on to a flight now so I can get my IPADS and trips to Dubai!

You know I always wanted to be aircrew and turned down and interview a few year back for emirates as did not want to live in a country where due to my lifestyle I may get rocks of my head, I was never the one to keep within my limits outside complexes guess I need to learn now

On some positive notes, Friday I went for drinks after work and get really drunk as you do and there was one smoker who kept going outside but I never at once got tempted. That’s old school. My partner recognised he now sees me as a complete non-smoker and advised I no longer snap at little things. And it’s like I never ever smoked so yehhhhhhh I’m getting there.

Maybe when he sees me saying goodbye to little Angie in a few months, I think he will force feed me 50 and attach me to a drip filled with Pinot.....

[nsd_user663_51617]

i bloody love your stories Derek. You are a legend and i am so pleased for you that you resisted.

[nsd_user663_52419]

Well Ive not had the best day so far but despite your turmoil im so glad i read your post, uv cheered me up and made me laugh..... oops not at ur bad news may I add lol

[nsd_user663_51671]

I feel like I just sat through a really good film!

Glad you didn't pick up.

[nsd_user663_6596]

Hey D!!!

Your going good, your ranting great, and them schmokes just dont fit in with your super slick styleeee!

xx

[nsd_user663_42390]

You are hilarious! So glad you didn't give in to the crave. These times come along when we least expect it and we just have to dig in and not give in.

I would love to have a neighbour like you, it would be great fun!

I dont agree about Rynal, he is just a wanna be, he has been on loads of reality shows! He will be the entertainment factor though