Day 27 and a constant battle


I don't know why the last 4 days have been so f***ing hard. I keep reading post in days 1,2&3 to remind myself that is where I'm going to end up if I give in and I don't want to be there but this is ridiculous.

I spend my entire day looking forward to night so I can go to sleep and stop thinking about the urge to smoke.

Over the years I have tried every stop smoking method available and the patches (what I’m on now) is my last option. Maybe I’m just destined to be a smoker for the rest of my life :( but I really don’t want to be

Anyway, I thought posting on here might help keep me honest. Thanks for reading and good luck with your quits


13 Replies

  • Hey Sparky!

    I know your probably fed up of hearing this - but - Hang in there! It will get easier! It will - just takes time!!

    Try everything to take your mind off of it - be it a bath, reading, exercise, forum, surfing, iphone games - whatever it takes!

    I know exactly what you mean - I look forward to the tranquilty of sleep too but it will not be always like this.

    You are not destined to remain a smoker - your have a choice not to smoke. Lets face it - none of us were born with a cig in our mouth.

    Sending you postives vibes!


  • You absolutely have to believe that there will come a day when those strong regular craves will disappear Sparky, because they will.

    When that it happens may be different for everyone, but everyone who sticks at it finally gets to that day for them.

    You've done 27 days, what's wrong with one more day?

    Tomorrow you will have done 28 days. Tomorrow ask yourself to go one more day.

    Eventually you will get there. It's worth sticking it out.

    Trust in yourself. Believe in yourself.

    It will be worth every single day of suffering when you get to that point when smoking no longer consumes your life.

  • Hey Sparky,

    Ugh, I understand, my week 3 was terrible, (seriously, I couldn't even post.. mini nervous breakdown)I felt so crazy and felt I was reverting backwards, but I personally think that before your aha moment, that stupid monster tries to get a kick/scream or two out for the finale (sp). After that for me, It really was a break. when you feel crazy- run until you can't run anymore, do push ups till ur arms hurt, get a massage, take a super hot shower (sweat it out) and when all else fails... ask God for help... like I did, when I couldn't take it anymore. His Mercies really are new every morning (even when we don't feel them). Hang in there buddy ;)

  • Jubilee - "when all else fails... ask God for help" Were not exactly on speaking terms at the moment. I lost both of my Grandfathers to cancer and my father to choking in a three year span about 14 years ago after going to Catholic schools and being an altar boy for 5 years. I didn't feel it was fair and deep down inside I know that I shouldn't be that way but I hold a grudge - what can I say. Maybe someday I can work on that to. (I hope I don’t offend anyone with my remarks) I can however ask any of the three for help. That may be exactly what I need to do.

    Capitan – I been using the “one more day” thing with myself for the last 4 days – I get tired of asking myself to go another day – lol. You’re right I need to believe in myself

    Chris – Thank you for the positive vibes and taking the time to post. I know it will get easier.

    I greatly appreciate the help from everyone, I just need reminders more often than others I guess.

    I am going to promise myself (and all of you) to not smoke today and hope tomorrow is better.

  • hey Sparky hang on in there, if your struggling . try reading some of the stuff on my links. theres loads of info about how to deal with craves and what to expect from quitting

    All the best mash x

  • Hey sparky, it was round about then that I felt a bit crap too. I was feeling a bit down and uncomfortable but it passed. Its getting good again now. Stick at it I promise you it will get better.

  • Hard days!!

    Hi Sparky

    I have days that are harder than others too. I'm on day 43 now & this week has been one of my worst so far!!! Why it is I don't know!! I think I'm going great - head in the right place etc then it happens.

    It must be subconscious associations going on that we're not aware of. Exercise generally is the best thing for me ( I need it with all of the eating ) since I think I just wear myself out & exhaust the subconscious in some strange way.

    One good thing though - it does pass.

  • Hey Sparky.

    Believe in yourself- thats a great bit of advice! Get stubborn, get angry at nicotine, and learn to hate the evil stuff!

    Hope it starts getting easier soon!

  • Sparky you're doing great so far.

    From reading all the posts on here and on other websites (I swear by, I think everyone has a breakthrough when they can see smoking for what it really is....a totally pointless habit. Some people appear to have a breakthrough on day 1 some day 101, but once they do their quit seems to go from being a constant struggle to a complete breeze.

    You really need to sit down for ten minutes and focus on what smoking really is and what you actually got from it??? Dont focus on what you're being deprived of, cause the answer is pretty're being deprived of nothing.

    I found watching people smoke useful, actually sitting watching someone closely sucking all that smoke into their lungs??? And for what?? It really is one of the most unattractive, pointless additctions ever.

    Hopefully the lightbulb "clicks" for you shortly, the feeling of being free is amazing.

    Dont give in!!!!

  • Over the years I have tried every stop smoking method available and the patches (what I’m on now) is my last option. Maybe I’m just destined to be a smoker for the rest of my life :( but I really don’t want to be

    Hey Sparky - I can't tell you how much that comment rang true with me. I gave up for six months last year and then lapsed over Christmas. It took me ages to get over that sense that it was all too late, and that I was putting myself through hell for nothing.

    The simple fact is that this just isn't true! I spent ages on this site reading the posts of other long term quitters, many of whom have smoked as long and as heavily as me. If they can do it, I can do it, and you can do it. Just hang on in there mate.


  • Sparky, I know how you feel. It's so so hard when you just obsess about smoking day in, day out. It's not the same as the first few days but it can feel so overwhelming.

    There's a post by AustinLegro which really hit the nail on the head for me - I'll try and dig it up - about how, no matter which method you use, you have to reach the moment where there is internal, subconscious change. I know for me it was a gradual thing that happened over the course of months, I thought about smoking ALL the time and had to make the conscious decision not to smoke every day. Sometimes it was hellish, sometimes not so bad, but always a determined, conscious choice to get through another day without smoking.

    For a long time I felt on a knife edge, like it was just a question of when, not if, I would cave. But I PROMISE YOU THINGS WILL IMPROVE. It changed, it got noticeably easier to make that conscious decision, bad days were fewer and further between, and at some point - around six months - I realised that something had happened subconsciously too, and I didn't *want* to smoke any more.

    You can do this. Stick with it. Stick with us. It will get better!!

    H x

  • Here's the post. I hope it helps:

  • Mash – I’m hanging in there and will come back to read the stuff on your links in a few minutes (after I reply to all these post of course – lol)

    Rochelle – It seems a lot of people experience a struggle around this time unfortunately. I’m going to just keep with it and hopefully it passes soon. I once quit for a year and I remember I would go months without even thinking of smoking and the one bad decision latter I was right back to being a full-fledged smoker:mad:. Sometimes I really hate myself

    Nonico – Congratulations on making it to day 45 now. I can’t wait for the easier days to come marching in. So many people here have found them already maybe were next – keep hanging in buddy

    Claire – What have you done to me? – This is all your fault – LOL. Thank you for always keeping me honest by silently stalking the site to see what I’m up to. I keep getting this vision of you literally running across the pond to give me the beating of my life if I were to start smoking again – oh, wait a minute that was a something different:D – never mind (my fb buddy)

    Red80 – I go to whyquit every day hoping to scare myself straight. I’m still at the point of my quit that I see a smoker and think it looks so relaxing for them to be smoking and often feel like joining in. “the feeling of being free is amazing” – this is what I’m after but maybe in more ways than one.

    BillyO – I know exactly how you feel ruining a good quit and having to repeat the entire process – it sucks. Congratulations for giving it another go.

    Karri – I can’t believe all these days have passed either. Just waiting for that magic moment and hoping it gets here before that oh f**k moment –lol (what’s wrong with me?)

    Helsbelles – If I only stuck with it I could be sitting in the penthouse with you and many of my other friends on this site throwing lines down the stairwells to help the others up but instead I choose to try and climb up the outside of the building where it is cold, lonely, dark and covered in ice:eek:. I’m hoping to reach a window here soon so I can come back on the inside and maybe even find an elevator. Please look out the penthouse window to see which side of the building I am climbing and run downstairs to unlock the window for me. When I started my journey I wasn’t planning on entering the building so I didn’t bring anything to smash the window if it is locked. Thank you for your help.

    Also, Thank you for digging up the post from AustinLegro there was a lot of helpful information. I am going back to read it again when I’m done here.

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