Hi - Newbie on day 5

Hi,

I am on day 5 of no smoking and feel a bit crap to be honest.

I have / had a chest infection which started at the beginning of last week and seemed to be getting better but now my chest feels like it's being sat on, I feel tired prob because I didn't sleep well for the 1st few days of not smoking but did sleep better last night :).

I'm not sure if the feeling in my chest is the infection rearing its ugly head again or if it's the not smoking :confused:

Anyway I am proud that I've come this far and I know I'm gonna feel worse before I feel better but I will be strong.

My husband is also giving up but I dont know if it's a good thing or not us giving up together. He relapsed today - only 3 puffs but as soon as he told me I was angry with him and really wanted a cigarette more than I have done since I quit but I didn't :D

What are others experience of giving up with your partner?

12 Replies

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  • Hi janners, welcome to the forum.

    The chest is probably the smoking, just compounded by recovering from the infection. If you don't feel about a gazillion times better in two weeks a) I'll eat my hat and b) you should see your GP. :D

    It is tough, this first bit, but it gradually gets better and better, you just have to grit your teeth and struggle through for the first few weeks. It is SO WORTH IT.

    My DH gave up around the same time as me. He is a stopper starter, because (irritatingly) he doesn't find it difficult at all to stop, he just stops. It's not good really because he knows he can relapse and then quit again after a while with no great pain. He's been pretty good, although actually he smoked a couple today (extreme stress, too complicated to go into, suffice to say I don't blame him).

    As long as you have it clear in your mind that your quit is your own, and you nurture it and strengthen it, then you can leave your OH to get on with his own thing and it shouldn't impact on you. Be better if he could remove temptation from your path at the beginning though!!

    Good luck with it all,

    Helen x

  • Just saw the bit about your being RD's sister. It's turning into a family forum, yippee!

  • Thanks Helen, I agree I'm going to have to let him do his thing and me do mine, I really was raging today like he had let me down but I suppose it's only himself that he's let down really. It's the first time he's tried to quit, I've tried a couple of times before so know how damaging those few puffs can be.

    I need to learn to step back, not judge him and not take it personally, that's as long as he doesn't smoke in front of me or I really wouldn't be impressed.

  • Hi sunlovingjanner,

    welcome to the forum and with a name like that you MUST be from my neck on the woods!!

  • Hi Sun (long names must run in the family!)

    Really well done on your quit firstly!

    My O/H gave up the same time as me, this time! And so far actually it's gone well for us both (not counting any chickens...). But we have tried together and separately in the past.

    Last time we tried together it was a nightmare. I get all sleepy, he gets all cross. We rowed big time - well, he yelled at me and I yawned a lot which, I gather, is very very annoying when you're trying to shout at someone!!:D So that didn't last too long.

    Trying to quit separately didn't work either. I found it just too hard to sit there wanting a cig and him puffing away. I failed miserably each time! Mind you the reverse was true with him too!

    This time we're giving up together but kind of ignoring each others quit - if that makes any sense? I get huge strength from this forum, and he... well I think it's a competition for him. As long as I'm not, he won't!

    Keep going, and well done!

  • Well done :D

    My husband is still smoking and not yet ready to give up, it is working ok though as long as he doesn't come near me! Last time we tried to give up together and once he relapsed I wasn't far behind.

  • Make your he smokes outside the house or threaten him with his scarry sister-in-law. If you are anything like me you will soon find the smell soooo repulsive you will be on his case all the time:)

    You will feel better Lisa, honest. You have done fantastic to get to day 5, stay strong and read lots. Whyquit forum is also really helpful and kept me focused (still does)

    Love you

    Tracey

  • Hi sunlovingjanner,

    welcome to the forum and with a name like that you MUST be from my neck on the woods!!

    I am from Plymouth too Clare :D

  • Make your he smokes outside the house or threaten him with his scarry sister-in-law. If you are anything like me you will soon find the smell soooo repulsive you will be on his case all the time:)

    You will feel better Lisa, honest. You have done fantastic to get to day 5, stay strong and read lots. Whyquit forum is also really helpful and kept me focused (still does)

    Love you

    Tracey

    I scare him enough by myself but you, well he'd be running down the street!! He wouldn't smoke in front of me or in the house whilst I'm trying to quit, he's not that mean (I dont think!).

    I have read quite a bit on Whyquit and it is good, I tried to get Ju to read it too but the only thing he reads is the back of a paper for the footie. I read a bit to him about the cycle of addiction and how the receptors in the brain react but his eyes did start to glaze over and to be honest I was getting bored too - it's not the same as reading it yourself, lucklily I read everything and anything anyway so its easy for me to read this stuff, I can get engrossed in the back of a cereal packet!!

    I'm on day 6 btw - every day counts you know - dont put me back a day :p

  • :D:D day 6 for my sis:D:D

    One whole week soon, how good is that - I am going to make you a badge x

  • you should stick with it I am sure your chest will feel better very soon. I too suffer from bad chests and like you at the moment its feeling sore, I am on day 6 of my quit, but I bet we will both feel better next week

  • Hi Sunlo......s!

    How is your chest today? Any better? DO hope so!

    Well done on getting to day 6, fantastic news! How dare your sis do you out of a day!!!:D

    I agree with you on the reading thing! Absolutely no point in reading stuff to the O/H, mine is completely catatonic within a micro second! Mind you good way to keep him quite. Bless!

    Keep up the good work!!:D

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