not too clever

I have wrestled with myself posting today. I am dreadfully down in the dumps but I do not want to seem like a failure. I have not smoked but have wanted too. I don't know why. I have tried to post to others in an attempt to reinforce why I quit. I have read the links. I have had several serious words with myself. Its so hard though. I see or smell my husband smoking, I know he has cigarettes. 'Just one' whispers my head. No! Shouts my heart. But this is a horrible spiral I feel I am in. I am scared that for the first time I do not feel confident about a long term quit. I keep thinking why bother. OH has not quit yet. Go back to the smokes and when he is ready quit together. It must be easier than this. But its not. I am sure. Is it??

16 Replies

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  • Keep it going Fiona week four now, we're getting the worst over with, and if you start again you'll have it all to go through again (if you're lucky enough) so keep struggling lass, you'll be ok. Marg will be here soon to give you a gee up. David

  • Hi Fiona

    Sorry you are down in the dumps but deep down you know smoking is not the answer or you would not be on here looking for help you would already be smoking Just DONT

    You are on week four already and you have heard and read about the terrible three's and that is what this is only a day or so late

    You also know who to blame for this no not yourself or O H you have coped with that for 4 weeks now

    It is quite simply those SNEAKY B.........D NICO :eek: DEMONS that are to blame they are really desperate by now and making a last stand don't let them win you would be so angry with yourself if you did You need to do something go out, scream, yell whatever but do something and you know it will not last for much longer

    If it helps I had a do like this at Seven Weeks and felt as you do I phoned Stuart as well as coming on here I kept going and so will you

    Lots of Love & a Huge Hug

    Margxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

  • fiona

    dont give in, its the nic demons that are playing with your mind. get them in a head lock while you gather your thoughts.

    whatever they are saying to you its all LIES! they lie and try to convince you to smoke. they say they will make you feel better but you wont feel better!

    you have given up now for 4 weeks thats brilliant, dont give in now.

    sending you some boxing gloves to thrash those nic demons with xxxx

    and a big hug ;)

  • Hi David :D

    Thanks for that vote of confidence have answered Fiona and sincerely hope it helped

    I just wish I could help you all more as I was helped when I first arrived

    Love

    Margxx

  • Hiya Marg. It's thanks to you and others who have been there and done it yourselves that keeps me coming back here to see that it works if we want it. David. (Bit slack today so I can sneek into the IT room)

  • Naughty boy HA HA But O won't tell anyone Scouts Honour

    Love

    Margxx

  • Naughty boy HA HA

    I'm in charge Marg lol. David

  • Fiona,

    I'm on week 4 now and it's a bit of a rollercoaster. You know you're not alone! Up one minute down the next. Funnily enough I'm not craving a cig- at least I don't have those demons telling me to go buy some fags. I'm just sad and a bit anxious.

    What's keeping me going is the thought of doing this all over again if I were to have a few cigarettes - cos I probably wouldn't stop at 1!

    We all know it will get better and so every minute that passes is another closer to the day we realise its not so bad after all!

    Stay strong x

  • Fiona, come on girl I know you can pull through this. I was feeling completely crappy this past 2 day and thank god I am feeling alot better this morning. Your kind words and the support of others have guided me through the bad times. I know it must be soooooo hard when your OH smokes but this is your time to stop. You have come such along way. Dont give in. Keep strong and tomorrow is another day (Quote from "Gone With The Wind.")

    Think of all the Feb quitters. Lets focus on this and get a name sorted....kind off getting sick of "ToBeConfirmed"....lol.

    Eileen

    xx

  • Thanks guys. Yesterday was massively difficult and tiring with my coaching course going on for 8 hours, then taking over the childrens care as OH was poorly. Today I am shattered at work. Maybe its a HALT thing? And its the tired bit. Just posting out loud made the demon retreat slightly, and all your lovely and sensible comments have also helped. Also, two bars of chocolate, some coca cola, a packet of crisps, a bowl of mango and some mejool dates have helped kick the crave into touch! I would be gutted to get this far and cave to the crave.

    Eileen Doin fine in feb 09 is good. I agree. As there are no other votes as such shall we make a management decision? You me and bella are keen. xx

  • Hi Fiona & Eileen :D

    So glad you both feel better now doesn't matter why or how you beat it only matters that you did

    Hi Bluedog :D

    Sorry you feel a bit sad and anxious but as you said this will pass just hang in there

    Love

    Margxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

  • As always Marg,

    you are an inspiration and a proper lovely person!

    Fi xxxx

  • Hey Fi.... I am always so damn late replying cause I am 8 hours behind!! I hope you are feeling better...... remember it is all in your head now!! Focus on your body and see how there are no more cravings physically.... it helps me sometimes.... to see my body relaxed, not on a crave.... even if my mind is not doing so well! AND ALSO..... your hubby would LOVE TO BE IN YOUR SHOES! When my ex quit 6 years ago I was so mad..... he just kept going, leaving me behind and I envied him..... don't have to envy him now. Hang in there, quit buddy...... and yup, I vote for 'Doing fine since Feb '09' :D:D

  • Can I vote for doing fine in feb 09 too?

    Not part of the group (yet?) but did stop on 20 th feb!

    Carole

  • There are bad days and good days but as time goes on the bad get fewer and good get more plentiful, sounds like yesterday was a bad one. I hope today is better for you Fiona.

    Hang in there, it is worth it.

    Nic

  • thanks Nick. Yes back to normal today. When you are in the depths of a bad crave, and they really don't come that often, its hard to see to the other side. But when you do, you think "what was all that about!" I suppose, as you go on, you learn to deal with it a bit more.

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