Please can I be so presumptuous as to give every single person on this forum a well meant warning. I know I am a relative newcomer but as you may be aware I am now into my fourth week and doing very well â€“ in fact so well I felt I was perhaps a little bit too confident. Well here is a cautionary tale and please take heed if you are ever tempted to take one more puff!
Just to give you the background trying to explain what I did and why I did it - on Monday evening my husband lost his job. We both work together, we have enormous problems to face as do a lot of other people in this situation and as of today I do not know how long I will continue in employment. My husband is 64 and I am 60. On Monday evening I was a total mess, crying, shaking, not knowing how I was going to get through the next hour let alone the next day or the next month, how we were going to pay the mortgage etc etc etc. I had a glass of wine and a moment of complete insanity. I KNEW THERE WAS A SAFETY BLANKET OF A HALF PACKET OF CIGARETTES IN THE HOUSE â€“ I LIT ONE! Surprisingly I have got to admit I enjoyed it â€“ now here comes the caution. It was something I felt I had to do because I thought I was bigger than cigarettes. I am not. It did not solve the problem but what it did do was wake up the nicodemon (one cigarette, thatâ€™s all it takes). Last night I went home and at exactly the same time as I had had that cigarette my thoughts turned to having another one (what harm would it do?) â€“ the power of the nicodemon cannot be stressed enough. I am not ashamed of what I have done, very upset with myself yes but with the extenuating circumstances I have forgiven myself. I could have just kept it to myself but if you are truly serious about giving up, please take heed and donâ€™t be tempted as I was to have a puff. It aint worth it. Hands slapped and apologies to Team Monkey Bar Stewards â€“ I will not let you down again.