I recently read a book about relationship OCD and although it was very informative and packed with ERP tools , it got me upset and feeling hopeless. The author pretty much said that OCD and anxiety are here to stay and I should get used to coexist with them. How can you coexist and accept something so cruel and disgusting. Something that messes up with your feelings, your relationships and your life.
I am obsessed with getting better and I’m taking 5 different supplements together with the SSRI- probiotic, NAC, Glycine, B complex and vitamin D. I’m sad to say that neither of these supplements make any difference in my OCD symptoms besides the fact there are few researches claiming each one of them significantly reduces OCS symptoms. I can’t give up and accept it. I will always be looking for the cure, for that method or medication that will quiet my thoughts.
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Phoenyx
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In my opinion, OCD and GAD aren't here to stay, in most cases, if you use the right management tools. OCD is a combination of personal predispositions, life choices, and circumstances (triggers).
For instance, if I have a tender conscience and a thought about something wrong I may have done in the past pops into my mind, I may be tempted to dwell on it, give it too much importance, especially at a time when my mood is down, instead of focusing on the "here and now". Then I enter a rabbit hole, from which it's difficult to get out because pressure to live a normal life is mounting and I may gradually lose faith in my ability to make sensible decisions. It's a downward spiral. Obtaining a "just right" feeling or absolute certainty may become my only hope to regain some peace of mind. However, my only realistic hope to regain some control of the situation is to make tough decisions and tolerate a certain degree of discomfort.
I don't think you should coexist with a distressing and impairing condition. But, to get used to the possibility you may not get all your wishes satisfied in life is part of the therapy. There are a few things that OCD sufferers find it difficult to accept, like, for instance, there is no perfect solution (we may have to choose sometimes the lesser of two evils), OCD recovery is a bumpy road with possible relapses along the way, a small improvement is better than none, etc.
It's normal to want to get better when you suffer from obsessions, but the first step towards getting better is not to let that wish become an obsession.
I feel like getting better has become another obsession for me. I read tons of researches, buy any supplement that is recommender by random doctors on the internet. I am obsessed with the very OCD. I am hyper vigilant of everything-possible triggers, possible anxiety... all the what ifs.
I'm currently on new medications and they worked great for me until I had a trigger and we had to increase the dosage. Now I'm in the waiting room again, praying they will start working sooner than later.
Don't put all your eggs in the same basket, like they say. "Skills before pills" is my motto.
How to prevent getting better from becoming another obsession? Let's say I'm diagnosed with a severe disease and my current doctors give me a 50% chance of survival. I may be inclined to seek another treatment that increases my chances of survival. There is nothing wrong with that. However, I may be tempted to seek a better treatment at the expense of everything I hold dear in life. For instance, I may neglect my friends and family, I may not eat or sleep properly, I may forsake all my hobbies, I may become prey to quacks, I may sacrifice my self-esteem, etc. In other words, I may live a miserable life, all for the sake of a possible new treatment that promises greater chances of survival. Is it worth it? No, because the price to pay in the search for a better treatment is too high, and it may be all for nothing.
In order to retain some control over my actions, I need to be open to the possibility that I may not find what I'm looking for. I should be able to conduct a search in such a way that I can justify my present actions whatever the results of the search. In other words, I don't have to count on the success of my search in order to justify it. If I don't let a search for a better treatment prevent me from living as normally as possible given the circumstances, I'm able to stop it from becoming an obsession. It's not always easy because the stakes are high, but it's possible with regular efforts.
I understand what you are saying. I'm putting all my eggs in one basket when I should be proactive and accept that if one treatment doesn't work, something else will. Instead I try way too hard and focusing on OCD all day long. Thank you
That's it. Actually, not focusing on OCD all day long is a sign of progress.
I understand that when one suffers from OCD, it's difficult not to be desperate to find an effective treatment, and when one is desperate to find something, it's difficult to think about something else. However, if one is open to the possibility of not finding an effective treatment or the possibility that OCD may not be helpful in the end, it's easier to direct one's attention to other matters. Positive results aren't immediate.
A fresh understanding of OCD is opening routes to new treatments
There is an article in New Science that shares a breakthrough in the understanding of where ocd may be originating from and gives hope for new treatments and possibilities!
I'm afraid that OCD is a chronic condition, but it is certainly manageable and you can live a pretty normal life.
The supplements you are taking sound sensible - probiotics (gut health is important with OCD), the B complex (known to be good for the brain) and for general health, vitamin D is great. But these don't 'cure' OCD.
Don't be expected a miracle cure. It's easy to go down the supplement path and expect wonders. I tried Rhodiola Rosea for some while, and didn't notice much difference. It can be expensive, too, trying different supplements.
Having the tools to deal with OCD - mostly CBT and ERP, helped by medication - is the best way that we know of. It does mean feeling uncomfortable until the discomfort wears off, but they do work. And the more you practise using these tools, the easier it becomes.
Don't think that CBT and ERP don't work - they take lots of practice and each attempt helps to undo the OCD.
I did in my shoulder some years ago - the slightest movement was painful and it ached from neck to wrist. I had physiotherapy, but was told in the meanwhile (I had an eight week wait for it) to stretch it gradually. Painful as stretching was, each little stretch eased it. A little pain for a lot of gain! I think CBT and ERP work similarly.
Thank you for your message. I started ERP and I had horrible anxiety for days after each session. I don't know if my therapist did something wrong, or the exposures weren't gradual but it was awful. Everyone says it works but I had horrific experience with it. I'm so afraid to continue it. I did understood what my compulsions are and try not to do them
It's so difficult, isn't it? I struggled too - I think most people do. I had a good therapist assigned me when I had a four month hospital stay for intensive therapy for my OCD - he didn't push me too hard but let me go at my own pace. Some therapists think you should immerse yourself completely with ERP but I've found it works best for me if I go slowly at it.
It could be that your therapist didn't go gradually enough for you - in that case try it on your own, at your own pace.
Although ERP is difficult and does involve discomfort, it shouldn't traumatize you. That just makes you retreat into your OCD.
Another thing that you could try is a substance called inositol. It's a natural substance and can be bought over the counter - check out drugstores and chemist shops or health food stores if you are interested in trying it. It hasn't been given the go-ahead as a front line treatment for OCD, though studies have been promising, particularly with hard-to-treat OCD. Large doses are needed - about 18 g a day - that's grams, not micrograms! - but side effects are few and it is safe to use.
I should be interested to know what book you refer to - I've found some more helpful than others!
I honestly feel traumatized by the therapy. It may feel stupid but I am truly terrified of what happened to me. I didn't expect to be easy but it was nearly impossible to tolerate the anxiety afterwards. I couldn't sleep, eat or do anything.
I have inositol at home. I will give it a try. Thank you for the recommendation and the support. I'm currently on new medications. I finally feel some happiness. I haven't felt happy for almost two years. I had postpartum depression which is annoying but really a piece of cake in comparison to OCD.
I had a similar traumatic experience - I had a therapist who was helping me with my clutter problem - he came to my house and directed my discarding some of my clutter. I found he was overly harsh - though in general he was very good - and on one occasion he seized on a box of my recently deceased mother's papers - only old bills and such on which she'd written 'Paid' with the date, along with other papers.
He made me shred the lot. I felt traumatized for ages after - putting her dear writing into the shredder. It's not as though I wouldn't have dealt with it in due course - but it was too soon and too fast.
I've found myself holding onto other papers of hers that I would most likely have discarded.
It's not stupid at all - CBT and ERP have to be done at your own pace. So don't blame yourself.
It's great that you're feeling happier now - a lot of people think OCD is something you can just snap out of. If only it were that easy!
Your experience does sound pretty traumatizing too! I’m really sorry you went through this. I know I will eventually do ERP again, I just need time. I also think I might have anxiety disorder because I experience anxiety with or without intrusive thoughts. It’s there constantly
It's hard to say - I had a couple of courses of it, at fairly lengthy intervals, and then a four month stay in the OCD ward of a hospital. But it's an ongoing thing - a bit like keeping the garden tidy, or keeping up with chores (though I'm bad at both those things!)
As I said, it's important to go at your own pace. I think getting the OCD under control is the key to managing the anxiety.
Can I suggest Sally M Winston and Martin N Self's book Overcoming Unwanted Intrusive Thoughts? I've only read an extract online, but I think it might be worth getting.
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