Pure O

[AlexisKY]

*may be triggers*

(Kinda long read, sorta)

Hi guys. It’s been a minute!

I’ve been steadily fine for a while, working full time (keeping pretty busy) my boyfriend and I mended our relationship, and everything is cleared up on that aspect.

I haven’t really felt my OCD spike in a while, but it’s starting to again.

This time around POCD. i think it was triggered due to seeing articles or a story regarding actual pedo’s.

I’ve never thought sexually regarding a child, I’ve never looked at images of them, nor would I ever do anything to ever hurt a kid in my entire life. But the horrible intrusive thoughts or images pop into my head at completely random times (and terrifies me that I may be some monster)

I’ve learned that OCD tends to grasp onto what you feel strongly for (in this case, I love children) I’ve suffered ROCD *relationship ocd*) HOCD (*harm ocd towards myself/others*) and many others.

Usually you’re not supposed to ask for reassurance when dealing with OCD, but has anyone had similar thoughts on POCD, or suffering from the same thing? Are there any positive things you may remind yourself to settle the OCD during that period it’s acting up?

Thank you!!

[Hidden]

Our area just had a death of a child by another child. Found out the kids dad was a pedophile. Yeah crazy when you wonder how people could be that way. My heart hurts for the child who will never be able to grow up.

[mind-full]

Hi AlexisKY

I'm suffering from the same thing. That is: HOCD & POCD

I find judging the intrusive thoughts helpful. Let it happen. Let it finish. And think: "Wow, that's horrible."

This sets you apart from the OCD, and protects your true sense of self.

If I'm with a child when these thoughts occur, I also exercise compassion thoughts. Things like:

"I hope this child never experiences OCD the way I have."

Or

"I want happy thoughts, because this child should be with happy people."

I don't want to leave the room physically, or spend mental time fighting the intrusion. Those are compulsions.

I want to be me! And like you, that's someone who loves children.

POCD is a shadow. It's dark and scary, but when you walk through it, there's always a light. A victory.

Good luck to you.

Be strong. Be yourself.

[AlexisKY in reply to mind-full]

Thank you!!! I’m sticking in there, I hope you are as well!

[MothFir]

I know a few people with POCD; I think it's pretty common.

Treat it like you would any other OCD -- let the thoughts show up but realize they do not reflect who you are or how you want to behave. Attribute them to OCD, don't engage with them, and don't avoid kids just because the uncomfortable thoughts might be stronger when you're around them. The more you can show your OCD that you're not taking its alarms seriously, the better!

Good luck, and good call on noticing how your OCD is shifting to a new topic. When you catch it early it's easier to overcome.

[AlexisKY in reply to MothFir]

Thank you! I’ve been doing my best, in treating it anyway I would regular OCD. just a very uncomfortable topic to talk about or think about, because it definitely makes you feel horrible about yourself for having the thoughts to begin with.

[mind-full in reply to MothFir]

Well said, MothFir!

I always read your replies. Your presence here is a valuable one.

Keep writing!

We appreciate when you do.