The Ghetto of the Mind

[Capicola]

I have struggled with OCD all my life I had a dysfunctional mother that destroyed my mental health I always feel guilty and see sin everywhere. I've been in therapy for years I just don't see things like my peers do. I have improved but it's tough to find real peace with God when you were taught that He was rigid and demanding.

[Mcfly64]

There is no need to feel guilty Capicola. God is loving and merciful. He died on the cross for our sins so we may have eternal life.

[Mcfly64 in reply to Mcfly64]

I struggle with the same thing. You must remind yourself that Jesus loves you and wants you to talk to him daily.

[IStillHaveHope]

I'm really sorry your struggling right now. I do understand what it's like to have OCD you're entire like. Early in my life I struggled with religious OCD too.

I'm also sorry you were taught that God was rigid and demanding. I don't know if this helps, but here's a quick story I was told about God. God is like 3 blind men trying to describe and elephant.

One has ahold of the trunk and says, "An elephant is like a large snake!"

The other has ahold of a leg and says, "No, an elephant is like a tree trunk!"

The third is pushing up against the side and says, "You're both wrong, an elephant is like the side of a barn!"

So the question is, which one is right? Well, they are all kind of right depending on what they're experiencing. They can't possibly experience all of the elephant so there's no way for them to describe it completely. It's like that with God. We all have different experiences with Him, but there's no way for us to describe him fully. I'd be wary of people who claim they know what the "true" God is.

If we view God as separate from us, He can feel rigid and demanding. Like a father who will punish you if you do wrong. However, I think this is a more simplistic view of God. If we take the view that a part of God is in us, then He seems more like a guiding force. Why would he desire to destroy part of himself? He is calling us to follow a good path because he loves us and wants the very best for us. He also knows that we will misstep over and over since we have free will and are not omnipotent. But he will forgive us, no matter how bad we fail and continue to love us infinitely.

At least this is how I feel the elephant

I've rambled a bit and I don't know if this helps, but I really hope you find some peace on your journey friend.

[ocdbegone89]

Hi, Capicola. I am dealing with something similar. I was raised by a dysfunctional mother as well, and I think it affected my view of God as well. How are you coping these days?