Just need to offload please!

[Redcol5]

Hi everyone, not been on the site for awhile as been ok but wife had an operation to remove gall bladder on 19th Dec and then had post op complications meant she had to go via ambulance to hospital on New Years and spent 4 nights in hospital as very ill and had an infection, she is back home and recovering but up and down and they still looking into why she is not as well recovered as they would hope her to be.

I have an eight year old son who is my world, he is a IVF bday and came after multiple miscarriages and failed attempts, so I’m an old dad of 53 now.

I tried to do everything for my wife and him plus a stressful time at work meant I had nervous breakdown and so currently halfway through my 2nd week signed off from work.

I broke down at work too and although they are very supportive, I have lost all confidence to do my to do the job and am dreading going back next week as well as the juggle again of supporting my son and wife.

The doctor has prescribed 15mg of mirtazapine which has helped me sleep at night but I’m still anxious and depressed with some thoughts of not wanting to be here, my wife is not very understanding of mental illness and so is frustrated I’m off work although accepts it has helped with childcare, we now row often as today she has gone out for coffee with a friend as she is improving but up and down.

I’m not sure why I’ve posted this but just feel a bit lost and wondering how I come back from this situation and I know this group has been supportive in the past.

Thanks for reading

Redcol

[TeddieW]

I have been on a variety of antidepressants but a consultation with a private psychiatrist recommended Mirtazapine at 45 mg pd. it took me a while to titrate to 45 mg but it definitely helped. My anxiety and depression is under control. Stick with it, things will improve …

[tamerlane]

I had the same operation a long time ago and yes it took several days before it seemed to settle down , In my case it was stones that the ssurgeon lost somewhere in my gut. So now it is still there, although yes the operation was success. I hope she improves soon normally it does not take long she will be tender. Has the scars healed yet, the did micro surgery here and I had three little holes, one in belly button, all gone now