Coca Cola cans in the UK have slogans to remind us to be #opentobetter
Just out of curiosity what would you #opentobetter? Thought this one was relevant as I’m due to start therapy soon and really worried about it. I know it’s a step I need to take yet I’m scared to do so. So the be brave slogan on this can (excuse the bad photo) to be brave was one best fit #opentobetter for me.
I love that slogan and I love that Coke is doing that in the UK. I wish they would do that in the US! It is certainly true that now is a time to work on being brave. Just remember that you are already open to being brave because you are already being brave!! Asking for help, receiving help, giving help - all of these take SUCH bravery!! You have made yourself vulnerable by sharing what makes you feel weak in order to ask for help AND also reached out to those of us who have shared our vulnerabilities and reached out for help. This takes GREAT bravery!! So I would say you are open to being brave and you are doing it! I am sure there are other things you would like to be brave in doing, but give yourself credit for the things you are already doing! 
I would like to be open to worrying less. Does that count? Perhaps for me, that requires bravery too.
You hit the nail on the head with that one. It does require bravery but then the doubt kicks in and says because I’ve been referred by the mental health team I’m weak because I need that support. Your reply means a lot to me and want to thank you.
I wish it would be on everything. The stigma surrounding mental health needs to be ironed out and not kept going to only get worse. It sadly affects so many people at some stages in life. It’s so strong and I’m not. I feel like I’m the weak one.
There are some lovely ones on the cans and I read each one. Some are blank to be thought about as well.
On their website you can personalise your own can as well which I think is good. Mine if I was to personalise one would be to put be a better person. Because I don’t want to be who I am. It’s so hard to see any positives.
I’m not good with words at the best of times but struggle to see that I’m being brave for all what is going on 💜
You are being so very, very brave!!! You do not need to be a better person, you need to feel better about yourself!! We are all weak, never forget that. It is just that some of us share our weaknesses and others hide them. Sometimes the people who hide them the most are the ones who act like they are the strongest and we can only tell they are weak by their actions. My young adult son told me a saying, "Haters are gonna hate." I don't know what that means to everyone, but to me it means that when you are feeling hate, you show hate. So if you are feeling hate to other people, you act out in hate. And sometimes the folks that are feeling this kind of hate to others, act like they are strong, but they are very weak. The hate they feel toward others is often really directed at themselves, but they are lashing it out on others (but that doesn't make it ok). But also, when we feel hate toward ourselves, we show hate to ourselves. I am just thinking this as I am writing it. What do you think? I know people don't like that word, hate. It has been turned into a bad word. But hate is a bad thing - so I think it should be ok to say it as it is - at least in a safe place. And I would like to think this is a safe place. There have definitely been times when I have shown myself hate. Thankfully, I am not there most of the time. But I would say that I am not kind to myself most of the time. I "talk" to myself VERY differently than I would EVER talk to anyone else. What about you? I can tell you that you talk to me very differently than it sounds like you talk to yourself. You have been very kind to me! Why don't you show yourself some of that kindness today, too. 🙂
I see strength in others just not myself. I’ve heard that saying about haters going to hate. It’s like what ‘Lucy’ says about ‘Tina’ says more about ‘Lucy’ than it does ‘Tina’. It’s true how you described it. I feel bad that I push many people away because I don’t feel worthy of them. Or I worry they will and some have and even family don’t want to know me.
I have nothing nice to say about myself but have so much compassion for others and want to be there for others and it saddens me that so many struggle. It’s not nice to feel the way I do so would always try and stop someone else from feeling the way I do 💜
Perhaps you can be open to being brave about being kind to yourself. You are wrong that people don't want to know you. That is your depression talking to you! I want to know you! I think that when we are feeling the way you are - and I have been in that kind of place many, many times - it is VERY hard to find anything nice to say about ourselves. But perhaps the way you could work on being brave is to step out on that limb of self-kindness. When you are in this painful place, when the darkness is pulling you down, it takes every bit of strength you've got to even imagine being brave enough to say to yourself - "Self, I know there is something good in you. I may not be able to see it right now, but I know it is there. When I am able to see it, I will tell you what it is." Because at the end of the day, I know that even when other people tell us the good they see in us, it can sometimes be hard for us to believe and allow ourselves to accept it. So perhaps you can begin by working on being open to seeing it. Just give yourself the kindness to allow yourself time to find it and don't judge it. Perhaps you start with something that seems small, like I am good at painting my nails. Seriously, some people are terrible at that! But maybe you do that well. Or maybe you can skip rocks or say a rhyme really fast. It doesn't matter what it is. Maybe you can tell a joke. I am terrible at that. My husband is so funny, he can rattle off joke after joke. Not so for me. I have one joke. Are you ready? Ok, here is my one joke. Are you sure you are ready, because it is really corny. A skeleton went into a bar. He ordered a beer and a mop! I know, you are rolling on the floor, your sides are aching.... Well, maybe not so much. BUT, maybe I maybe you roll your eyes and smile? In case you haven't figured out, I am a very quirky, eccentric person. But that is actually one thing I like about myself. When I push that part of me away, that is when I start to lose myself. But, that doesn't resonate well with everyone. So, if that is true with you, please don't hesitate to tell me. I am seeking people that are open to that, and I don't want anyone to pretend that they do and really don't. If it's not for you or if I write too much..... It's ok to say, that's just too much for me right now. I get it. Sometimes, you just need quiet. And that is ok too. The last thing ANY of us need is to put on masks with each other. This is the place to remove our masks and be who we really are.
This is the one place my mask comes off. I’ve had some trying times on here and I was at giving up on life and myself when I registered. I had done the works. Walked away from home, boarded a coach and went away. It was both wrong and right. I was running away from things then painfully realised it had followed me. I couldn’t get away from the one person I wanted to get away from...me. It got that bad my posts got removed by the mods and my name got changed to what it is now by the moderators. Since then I’ve not changed it. I tried to change it back to what it was and it got removed again. I gave up trying to change it back. It broke the rules. Here for me is honesty in a world where I try to hide behind a mask. A wall. A barrier. Anything to hide me away. Here they all collapse and I am the raw me. Depressed, sad, messed up and wanting to change and be better. As the years have gone on I’ve lost pieces of myself and haven’t found them again. Does that mean I’ve lost that part of me? Never to get it back? The dark seems so consuming. Just by you taking the time to read my words and reply means a lot. Long replies or short I don’t mind. I read all replies and messages. But I fully get what you say. I did smile at the joke you shared. I hate that I’ve learnt to wear a mask. I thought it would always keep things in tact. Maybe it did for a while. In college my head of department covered a lesson instead of giving us a free period to self study she took the session and within a few days I was in her office a totally different person. In class I was there in some form. Hiding my feelings and in her office I had broke down. I didn’t think I could go on. At first I pushed her away. She didn’t go anywhere. She checked in on me and would push me to let out all what was inside. As soon as I left college I reverted backwards. I took steps forward to then take more back. Lately it’s been me in a rut, trapped and wanting out. I don’t want these dark thoughts I have anymore. In all honesty I like talking to you.
Thank you for trusting me. I need you to know, though, that I am not a psychiatrist, psychologist, or social worker. I am here to listen and support you as one who has been there and truly cares. As someone who has been there and truly cares, I must ask if you have had professional help. If so, has it been helpful? What has been your experience? You mentioned the mental health team. Who are they?
Please know this because I do have professional help. I do not walk this road without professional support because I can't.
I don’t think I could do it alone either. I have tried and always end up being referred back to get support.
I think those going through or been through similar are like minded and know where we come from and can understand. To me that’s huge. Peer support is just as important.
I’ve had on and off therapy since I was a teen. Numerous ones didn’t help as was always pushing them away. To me at the time they were nosey and just wanted to know my secrets and expected me to trust them. Now I see they were just trying to help. But I still do to this day push people away. Not as much but it’s still something I do. Or I sugarcoat but those who know me can tell when that happens. With those I tell it as it is. They know me for me and they still there for me.
I’m due to start therapy in the next two weeks for 18 months. It will be virtual until safe to return to face to face. For that I am scared but know it’s something I need to do. I’ve not been in therapy now for a good few years and been on waiting lists. The last therapy was called CBT and only had a small amount of sessions so within that time not much was covered. The mental health team are a team based on your local area. I am waiting for a new CPN which is a Community Psychiatric Nurse who usually sees me every week or every other week. There is also a Psychiatric doctor who will do reviews with you. These can be to do with medication or referring to other services.
Do you want to continue this conversation in chat? Is sort of doesn't fit with your original post..... If you are #opentoabetterplace..... LOL
Lol 🙂
But we don't have to use chat. Whatever works for you AND are on different time zones. I think it is a lot later there. You need to be getting some sleep!!
Sure. Will pm you now.
My #opentobebetter would be in school. I would love to get better at using my time, find a better way to study, etc.
That’s a good #opentobetter. Do you think it will help if you planned your time breaking down each subject and then take regular breaks. I was the same. Was always leaving things to the last minute.
I have been using planning techniques for a while they just no longer seem to be working that's why I need new things to try.
Hi , I liked your post and hope to offer my experience. I did a 6 month group with around 10 people which i finished in January 2020. I actually waited 28 years for therapy because it was not around in the early 90's when i first was in a Psch ward.
Because i was in such a mess i was terrfied when i first started the group and i started quiet for the first few sessions. One day though, i actually got excited about the group and my new friends. In a controlled enviroment with good staff and patients who were understanding it was the best thing i could of put myself through. Sometimes i came home and roared (cried in midlands talk).It was really hard , but i pushed myself and i finished the group.
The pride you can have in your self for trying will make you feel good.
Your brave for just trying , stick with it if it's tough best wishes and good luck
😀👍👍
Good luck on your therapy Hope everything will turn out well I love the slogan and I like to drink what’s inside! Uugghh but no~~~avoid caffeine for better future! I am brave! Hihi we are brave! Lets keep on fighting
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