Tired, frustrated and just ready to give up

I've been dealing with major depression since I was little. In and out of hospitals for years with nothing working. My last hospitalization was in January of this year for a month. Sadly, because the medical staff don't listen to you, you learn really quickly what to say to get out. It's almost like the psychiatric floors in hospitals are just places to house people dealing with mental issues, not a place to actually get any type of help. I've had psychiatrists yell at me, social workers blame me, therapists not listen to me - I'm a thorn in everyone's side. Just someone to get rid of. My depression is a lot worse, I'm wishing I wasn't here any longer. I don't feel anything. I can't cry anymore. I want to scream and yell but can't. I feel like a prisoner in my own body and head and I want to escape.

[Hidden]

You have to study and cure yourself - plenty of books on depression, stress and anxiety!

[Livetotravel]

Sorry to hear that, major depression is awful. When I have it I just keep remembering/writing down that it does pass/ease a little. What works for me is distraction with TV and taking lots of naps to turn off my brain for a while. Stay strong and take care.

[PrairieVillage]

Hi.

I have also suffered from major depression since I was a small child. I have never been hospitalized, but I started seeing psychiatrists, therapists, psycho pharmacologist since my 20s. Drugs, talk therapy and really nothing helped me. During my heavy depression I experienced the most horrible pain I wanted to mill myself. As I’m sure you know no one can understand unless they’ve experienced. 2 years ago I discovered Kratom through the Netflix documentary called A Leaf of Faith. I watched it and it was mentioned that it helps depression and anxiety. I was desperate at the time, so I bought Bali capsule form Kratom at a smoke shop. Literally after a couple of days my depression lifted. This has been a miracle I also recommended it to a friend who had severe depression and it worked for him.

Please try this and don’t pay attention to negative comments on the web.. they are not true.

I wish you the best.❤️❤️

Margaret