Issues: On Saturday night, I was in a... - Mental Health Sup...

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Issues

Kakee83
Kakee83

On Saturday night, I was in a really negative place and I needed a lot of reassurance, comfort and support. My psychiatrist called me and she ended up calming me down. My husband set me off earlier that evening and I really didn't know how to handle it. I did not want my psychiatrist to talk to him, because I was so embarrassed and I knew that he was upset. I didn't want to make anything worse. He wrote me an email on Monday apologizing and everything is fine for now. I just wanted to be close to him again, because we have been drifting a part for a long time now. He is never home and we really don't spend quality time together, like when we were dating.

Also, my psychiatrist reassured me that I don't have Borderline Personality Disorder, because I was really freaking out about that. Everyone I talked to said that I did fit the criteria and that upset me so much. I am not narcissistic, I am not a psychopath and I am not a sociopath. What do they know... As a matter of fact, I rely too much on others' opinions of me and if they say negative things, it affects me greatly. I have always taken things to heart and I do not mean any harm towards anyone. In fact, I am such a people pleaser to the point that I over work myself and I stop taking care of myself totally. This affects my jobs and is the main reason that I can't hold one. I eventually become burnt out and get physically sick. I feel that if I say and do what people want, people will perceive me positively. Unfortunately, I over exert myself. I am very passive and agreeable and I do not like conflict at all. I was wondering why people have always affected me so much to the point where if someone says and does something negatively, I take it strongly to heart and I become extremely upset.

I was looking up other personality disorders and I think that I really do have Dependent Personality Disorder. I really can't take care of myself and I rely too much on the opinions of other people. I also do what they tell me to do; most importantly, my husband and my mom. I miss them when I haven't seen them for a while and I feel like I need to be around others to function properly. I always think about what I am going to do without my husband and my mom and this upsets me. They help me out and have always helped me out so much and for this I am greatful. I feel like I don't have a purpose if I am not surrounded by others. I just want to make a difference in lives. I was even agonizing for months whether or not to stop seeing my psychiatrist (because my insurance had dropped) to the point of becoming extremely upset and anxious. Luckily, everything worked out and I can still do so because she and her staff is good people.

So... Yeah... I was reflecting on the characteristics of dependent personality disorder and I do fit them...

4 Replies
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Hello Kakee83

Thank you for your message

You sound as if you Have a good awareness of your situation. You are very perceptive which may help.

You may be right about the dependent personality disorder. Perhaps you could discuss this if and when you do see your doctor or psychiatrist.

Our members are very supportive so may have more advice and information for you.

The topics and pinned posts may also have more information to help.

Do let us know how you get on

Best wishes

Kakee

Your Psychiatrist will have an idea what your problem is and should be helping you come to terms with your condition.

You need to know when to say no when people are taking advantage of you. Remember you cannot please everyone all of the time, you need to consider you have needs as well as others. You seem to know what your concerns are you are lacking confidence in taking control of your own life. DPD, you really need to try and delegate to others as they are doing to you. The problem is if you cannot look after your own interests people will walk all over you and respect can be lost

What has your Psychiatrist suggested ?

It may help if you can join a day centre or other Organisation that supports people with Mental Health concerns. I gather you do not live in the UK, so you could ask your Psychiatrist if He knows of any clubs or centres set up for Mental Health Patients as these work on Peer support, like here, although more inclusive, you need to talk with others who will not judge, then hopefully you will gain more confidence when around others.

We are however here to support, you can always come on here and at least we can listen

BOB

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Hello, you say, 'I just want to make a difference in lives'. Well, altruism is to be admired and it shows you are a kind person. Helping others is something we should all aspire too. Please remember though that you should make a difference to your own life....you deserve kindness and compassion. Self-reflection can be positive but don't be too hard on yourself.....focus on the many positives ! Take care,

Thanks everyone for your advice and support!!! :-)

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