Is this really the U.S.A.?: I haven't... - Mental Health Sup...

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Is this really the U.S.A.?

Krazie profile image
8 Replies

I haven't posted for a while. I am posting today because I am at my wits end. I have tried my best to stay positive, for my grandson. Can you believe it - he remains in the locked facility where children are taken after removal from home. It is supposed to be very short term. It was never meant to be long term. He has been there for over two months, now. The place is kept locked, like a jail. They only get to go outside when being transported somewhere. There are cell sized rooms for sleeping, and one large commons area. He suffers from severe anxiety, which is untreated, and sounds as if it is getting worse. Recently, a boy came in, who sounds as if he is bullying my grandson. My grandson is being blamed for some things that have been happening around there, and I wonder if it is this boy, who is really responsible. When his case worker brought him in to see me for the last visit, my grandson's face was red, and looked as if he was trying not to cry. He was obviously not allowed to talk to me about it. I spoke to him on the phone last night, and he told me a little about this boy. His call, which is always monitored, came to an abrupt end. I call my lawyer, but all he will tell me is to keep quiet, that 'they' have all the power, and can cut me out at any time. So now I am wondering if we have a version of the Gestapo going on here in the U.S. The things I am discovering ARE HORRIFYING. I am so worried about my grandson. Are they stringing me along, and really have no intention of placing him with me?? I have to knock myself out at night with sleeping meds, and even then, i am awake in 5-6 hours. My blood pressure is starting to go out of control, again. The judge ordered social services to have him out before the next court hearing. There is supposed to be a meeting to determine his placement, but it hasn't been scheduled, yet, or so I am told. The court hearing is in two weeks. This is cutting it very close. My lawyer wants to be there, and I worry that he will have scheduled something else when we are finally told the date, and time. Not that my lawyer has done much. Just tells me to keep quiet. I am waiting to see how he represents my grandson and I at the meeting and the next court hearing. My grandson is a good kid. I really do not understand the purpose behind their actions, or lack of action. Is it possible they are trying to break him, in some way? He is close to breaking. I can see it.

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Krazie profile image
Krazie
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8 Replies
Krazie profile image
Krazie

I thought I might feel better, after posting, but I don't. Putting it all into words is making it all that much scarier.

sweetiepye profile image
sweetiepye

hi Krazie, I'm wondering why your grandson was removed from home in the first place. Was your lawyer court appointed? You need to appear in control and cooperative if you

want custody. Th court system is not your friend. being emotional or placing blame will not help you. be the loving, supportive grandma. Be positive . Pam

Krazie profile image
Krazie in reply tosweetiepye

My grandson has a court appointed lawyer, who is called a guardian ad litum, who is supposed to look after his well being. She is carrying a double case load and is obviously not able to look after anyone's well being, not even her own. I hired a lawyer, because in the beginning, I was told there was a 'no contact' order against me. The lawyer I hired found out it was a lie, and I began to receive visitation with my grandson, although it has been supervised. I am allowed a 5 minute phone call several times a week, also supervised.

My grandson was removed because of the mother's (my daughter) boyfriend abuse.

Actually, i am discovering I am a very good actress. I missed my calling. I am able to maintain a calm, cooperative manner. I can even laugh and joke with the social worker, even though I know he has told me many lies. I can't stand liars.

With my grandson, I try extra hard to smile, instead of cry. I try to think of uplifting stories to tell him. I tell him I know he can get through this, because he is strong, and I pray every day for God to wrap him in His armour, and keep him safe.

Sweetiepye, thank you for your words of encouragement. It means so much to me. I may feel i am crumbling inside, but the outside world will not ever see it. it is to you and the other kind people on here that i express how hard it is getting. it is to you that i cry out my heart, and you have been placed here to offer hope to me. Thank you again for being here, and finding the time to speak to me.

May God bless you and keep you........

sweetiepye profile image
sweetiepye in reply toKrazie

It sounds like you are being a smart about this. Keep In touch. I will pray for you. God is good. Pam

Krazie profile image
Krazie in reply tosweetiepye

Thank you, Pam. You are a blessing.

AppsFun profile image
AppsFun

I wish you strength and composure. I know certain things can seem harsher than they are. I’m not suggesting you shouldn’t be concerned. I don’t want you to be overly worried or loose focus. It is frustrating when support is lacking, especially with bullying and anxiety. Things don’t move as fast as you want them to. I’m afraid you’ll just have to go at their pace. Keeping quiet can also feel frustrating but again its best to go with your solicitors advice. I’m sure it will all work out for you and your grandson. Knowledge is power. Understanding of everything means not falling into failure. You solicitor will have this knowledge and will be doing and suggestion things that may be unusual to yourself. You might find a solution yourself that can trigger extra support or safe guarding for your grandson.

Best wishes.

Krazie

Sweetiepye is in America therefore knows the system out in your neck of the woods.

I live in the UK and not sure of the system you have to navigate through.

All I can say is if the child is in protective custody it may be they are concerned if the Father get access to your Grandchild in any way If that is the case they may well prefer to keep in a safe space. This is a bad place for you and your Grandchild you are in e lap of the Gods, your Lawyer most probably will try and arrange a placing if it is safe to do so. The Social Team may arrange Fostering in some way. It all comes down to what has happened to the child at his Home and family

BOB

Krazie profile image
Krazie

Thanks Bob, and Apps for your comments. It helps to know that people care enough to post comments to me. :)

I have been sitting quietly on the side lines, following my lawyers advice. I received very upsetting news today that has turned the idea of sitting quietly aside upside down. It occurred to me that my lawyer has not spoken to the judge about my wishes to have my grandson with me, nor has he filed a petition with the courts. The judge has only heard from the social workers, and a 'guardian ad litum' who appears to be on the verge of a nervous breakdown from over work. Social workers have constantly thrown up excuses for why I would not be a good placement, even though I have been able to refute every one. The judge has not ever heard my side, just the social workers side. The news I received today is nothing short of criminal. The ss has hired a psychologist with a dubious reputation to 'test' my grandson, claim he doesn't have autism, and that he has behavior problems. This, in spite of the fact that my grandson was tested by a team of professionals in grade school, and diagnosed with high functioning autism. Autism does not go away. However unfortunate that may be, it doesn't. The claims this so called psychologist is trying to make causes her to be eligible for loss of her license to practice. Because my grandson is now classified as behavior disordered, he is not getting the help he needs for autism. This includes educational, medical, and emotional support. None of it has ever been provided by the state. On top of that, the social workers plan to put him in a group home for emotional and behavior disturbed boys. He is already disintegrating, and becoming more unable to cope. For which he is told he is a bad boy, and deserves to be locked up. Which he will be if social services gets their way. If this happens, he will not be able to cope at all. He has just barely been hanging on by a thread, as it is.

I will not sit on the sidelines any longer. It will not be said that my grandson's Gramma sat by and did nothing. Since i seem to have a lawyer that just collects money, and 'hopes' I will be liked well enough for social services to place him with me, I realize that more action is needed. I called the state Child Protection Ombudsman, and told her everything that has been going on. Her comments made me feel she is familiar with autism, and is horrified by the things I told her. She promised to review the case tomorrow, and begin an investigation right away. She is really my only earthly hope for my grandson.

I have prayed, and prayed. I felt that God answered my prayers by telling me that He has the points of His swords pointed at their gates, that their hearts will grow faint, and their troubles multiplied. He has promised the light will shine bright.

I believe Him. I have seen the people who are supposed to be looking after my grandson's best interest, and welfare, appear more frazzled and hurried every time I see them. Their eyes droop, their voices are more faint, their skin tones more pallid. They are not doing well.

I remember the many and numerous times Moses stood before the pharaoh, and asked that his people be released. Again, and again, he was denied. Even when the people were let go, after a series of plagues and hardships, the pharaoh sent his army after them, only to be swallowed up by the Red Sea. The people escaped, unharmed. Do you believe in modern day miracles?

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