Depression and anxiety is ruining my life.

[Kate94]

Hi guys,

I’m a university student studying adult nursing, I have just started my 3rd year in Feb but haven’t actually attended. I was diagnosed with depression and anxiety in December last year. There was a period where the medication and CBT combined were doing some good, but I’m stuck in this viscious cycle. I’m not studying or working, im really struggling financially because of this.

I’ve decided to take 5 months out of uni and try and get better, but my parents aren’t supportive of that decision. I almost feel as if my mum doesn’t believe me.

I feel like I’m stuck in a hole and I can’t get out of it. My life is crumbling around around me and I can’t do anything about it.

I would really appreciate it if someone could give me some advice or tips

Thank you

[MAS_Nurse]

Hi Kate94 and welcome to this caring forum. I am sorry to hear that you are experiencing these difficulties. You made a brave decision by taking 5 months out of university to concentrate on getting better. I am sure this was not an easy decision to make, but as you are aware, we need to be physically and mentally well ourselves to manage the demands of the course. You will be able to continue your training when you are feeling better. There is no harm in taking time out if we are unwell. Have you spoken to your personal tutor at university about how you are feeling? They would also have a pastoral team who could provide support. It may be an idea to write down how you are feeling and explain to your parents that this is the reason you have taken time out. You may also like to talk to your GP again and discuss further treatment. Also, MIND website has some helpful, supportive information---

mind.org.uk mind information line 0300 123 3393

The university should be able to advise you about financial matters. Mind charity also provides advice about benefit entitlements [Citizen's Advice Bureau also provides advice regarding financial matters citizensadvice.org.uk.

Try to do things you enjoy and find relaxing. I hope you will soon be feeling better. Are any other forum members able to help Kate94, please? Thank you and best wishes.

[Endo101]

I cannot provide you with any advice but I feel I should let you know I'm in a similar situation and that you are not alone. I'm going to have to defer some of my uni work to next year and my parents aren't supportive either. It just makes you feel worse. I hope things get better for you!

[Hidden in reply to Endo101]

Endo101 and Kate94,

My daughter found herself in a very similar situation last year. We think her decision to take time off was excellent. Hey, parents often worry that if their child takes a break, she/he might not return to school. We have to learn to relinquish control.

I praise you for making your mental health a priority!

Blessings!

[JJJ321]

For what it’s worth think taking time out is the right & brave decision. Well done for looking after yourself & try & think this is the start of getting your life back.

Coming from a background where my parents thought education was everything I understand the position you are in. Perhaps explain situation to parents, there are forums to help people support us which might help them & in turn help you. Could you go back home for 3 months or perhaps speak to uni or counselling to see what options are available. Talking & sharing issues can help to find some solutions.

Really hope you find a solution that is right for you. And don’t feel alone, you are not.

[sweetiepye]

Hi Kate, Looks like I'm the odd man out here. I started college when my anxiety was at it's worst. I was in therapy and was encourage to live my life as if I didn't have anxiety. In other words I didn't give in to it. I was horrified at the thought because I was almost house bound. Any way I signed up and off I went. I would have a panic attack once or twice a class. It was exhausting. Each semester it got better and better and sometime in my second year it was over. If you take a break you still have to deal with anxiety and if you stay in school you still have to deal with anxiety. To get over it you have to learn to control it. Anxiety changes your thinking into believing it is so powerful and something bad is going to happen to you. That just isn't so. The most it can do is scare you, if you ignore it , it gives up.Believe me I know the fear and I also know you can overcome it. Pam

[sweetiepye in reply to sweetiepye]

I just wanted to add that no one will understand what you are going through or how hard it is. So whatever you do you won't be judged on here and we will always support you. I am not so ridged as to believe what works for me will work for everyone. You are probably much stronger than you think. Keep in touch. Pam

[Hidden]

Hiya Kate. I am so sorry to hear about your situation. Please be patient and stick with the medication and CBT. They take time to work effectively. As a parent myself who has been in this situation I think your parents would benefit from CBT themselves and also family therapy as they probably have no real understanding of what you are going through. Maybe your mum could go with you to your doctors appointment to help her understand and ask questions. Is there another family member who could help out with communication between you and encourage your parents to learn more about this illness? Take care,

[JoanellaJ]

Sorry you are having trouble.. read Hope prevails by dr. Michelle' bengston she suffered with depression too..her book is Very uplifting. She is also on facebook.take care....hugz