So recently my best friend got into trouble and had to move schools and we can’t talk anymore and I hated going to this school but she made it bearable and I felt like I could do it. Now she is not here. And she was my best friend and I could tell her anything and now I feel like I have no one. I guess I felt maybe a little sad or off Before this happened but now I can’t even describe how i feel. I see other kids and how they have someone and I feel like I have no one. I get mad a irritated with people very easy now and I never used to be like this.
This sounds completely lame but almost at time I seem to have trust issues. Friends will ask me to hangout and I feel like they have another motivation to hangout with me ( I can’t drive so like wanting a ride home or something). I have never been this way I am just confused
I am a good student and really care but now I just don’t. I can’t Find the motivation to study and I don’t see why it matters. Before all this happened my parents noticed my behavior and asked if I was okay and they try to talk to me but I feel bad I feel like a failure as a daughter for feeling/acting this way. I feel like my only job is to go to school get good grades and be happy.
I feel alone and I feel like I could just disappear and no one would notice. I don’t know what I feel like anymore I guess. I mean at school I am cheerful I guess but when I am alone all I do is cry. I just want everything to stop. I have kinda started talking to someone but at times I feel like I am just making this up and it’s almost like I wanna feel like crap. I have a roof over my head I know where my next meal is coming from I have access to education. It would be a lot worse and I just need to grow up?
I guess is it normal to feel this way? It it just teen drama and I need to build a bridge and get over it and I just throwing myself a pity party? Am I just being over dramatic?