Relationships

[madonna84]

I an seeing a guy called Jason I have been with him for 6 years he is in jail for attacking me I am still writtung to him I do want to be with still as an not a saint in all this really I want to see wat people think as I an scared of wat people think about me been with him I love him he makes smile any way since tht day I have been doing crazy things I feel as if am greifinh for him I feel si guity for wanting to be with him and u jst wnt rid of the bad feeling even wruttung this I feek sick

[Celtic27]

Hi i understand that you want to be with him but are you willing to take the risk of him attacking you again ! Have you considered councilling for you both to see if you can work together to solve what the problems are in your relationship ! Dont feel guilty for him being inside as no man should lift a hand to a women no matter the provocation ! Think long and hard about what you want in a relationship and take it from there david

[Hidden]

Er...Madonna what do you love about him? Does his smile and the way he makes you feel make up for his attacking you so seriously he is in jail? You might think he loves you and the fact he beat you up proves it, but it actually means the opposite. It means he doesn't and can't love you or anyone despite the sweet words he whispers in your ear and the promises. Deep down he only loves himself. In a healthy relationship people don't attack each other!

Do you think you are in love with the idea of being in love rather than the reality of your situation? He is not going to change you know and when he comes out of prison he will do it again. Next time or the time after he might kill you.

You might be better off using the time he is in prison having counselling so you don't continue to attract or want an abuser. x

[Jem92]

A leopard never changes his spots! You deserve better than that! My advise would be to walk away and move on with your life. Trust me I’ve been there and done that and they never change. I waited for my ex for 2 years when he was inside sent him money etc and he manipulated and controlled me the whole time. Life is too short for this stuff. I was always with bad boys until I found my husband who is such a good man and would never lay a finger on me and treats me how I deserve to be treated. Takes some time to get used to it but you will get there and never look back. X

[lin62-65ze]

Madonna you really have to listen to Celtic, lilacil and Jem 92, you have to stop writing to him, if he is allowed to write back he will continue to manipulate and destroy you. Obviously you feel guilty for him being in prison, however he must have done some serious damage to you. Do you want to be with a man who treats you like this? Get help, you must have victim support, do what Jem 92 did get yourself a decent caring man, you think you still love him but I am sure if you ever contacted a women's refuge centre you would think differently. This site will support you, get help ASAP and STOP writing him letters. Be strong we know you can do this 😊😊

[rossie1942]

You are bound to be lonely and afraid of future. You have been through hell. Abuse leaves awful mental scars as well as physical. Guilt and dreams of what might have been if only dominate your life. By writing to this guy who no doubt you are now convincing yourself did not mean to hurt you is delaying recovery process. It is not easy but you have to move on. You urgently need specialist help. Is there a woman's group near you to help. Speak to gp or post your town here as people will know source of help every good wish be strong

[marigold22]

I'm in my 60's and please believe me, a leopard never can change it's spots. I've walked away from two relationships after they both hit me and manipulated me. These kind of men home in on kind women. You need to concentrate on YOU. Do some counselling to discover what it is that attracted you to him. Many women do admit they like a 'bad boy' but it only leads to big trouble. Imagine what your life would be like if you were together - awful for children too. Look after you.

[spzgirl51]

hi madonna84 ,

i say give yourself some space to breathe and feel again. it is hard to turn off your feeling but you can find someone else who will kind to you?

you have been hurt, but, do not let this happen to you again.

let him go and do not blame yourself for what has happened in the past.

This can be a fresh start for you?