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Clockwor profile image
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Hi. Im new to this site and im looking for way to cope and to find out what's wrong with me. Just anything that could help. Im 23 year old female and for the past 6 months ive been feeling so screwed up in the head. My job is stressful but i used to handel it with a smile on my face and without an inch of negative energy. Now it im paranoid someones watching me, trying to get me in trouble, im easily irritated and get angery over small things. Some days i want to crawl under a rock and sleep forever. Other days i want to cry and scream....but i dont know why. My boyfriend moved in with me 6 weeks ago. Its been nice having him around and like any couple we sonetimes fight (nothing big) but im scared if he knew how bad my head is he would leave. I over think everything. Like my head is going to explode. I dont know whats wrong with me. I try and hide my negative feeling so as not to let others think im nuts or bring them down too. Can anyone help me?

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Clockwor
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MAS_Nurse profile image
MAS_Nurse

Welcome 'Clockwor' to this very supportive community. It sounds like you are struggling at the moment, I wonder what happened six months ago? As you say you were a positive person before and could handle the stress of your demanding job, so something did occur that changed that for you. Have you spoken with any healthcare professional about these feelings that are very real for you. Perhaps that is the place to start. Let your boyfriend in to what you are feeling, as a problem shared is often halved. Or is there someone who you are very close to that you can discuss some issues with. However please remember you are not alone. Good luck and best wishes xx

Sarah1111111 profile image
Sarah1111111Ambassador

welcome to the site, this is a really supportive place and many will be able to relate to what you are going through. You mention your job is stressful but that you used to cope well with it. Has anything changed at all in the last 6mths, or more? are you managing to get enough rest/ take breaks/ holidays? they all help us to manage stress. I am guessing that if you have also moved house and starting living with someone this, although positive, does add more stress, and I'm wondering whether you are managing to have enough time to recharge your batteries?

If we get too run down this can lead to our mood getting lower and us being less able to cope with stress.

I hope that you are able to start sharing some of what you are feeling with your partner - perhaps just say little bits to start with the gage his reaction. I am sure he will be supportive and listen and as he does you may feel able to gradually share more of what is in your head with him. It really does help to talk to others - friends family or colleagues if you can trust them,

Clockwor profile image
Clockwor in reply to Sarah1111111

Hi.

Thank you for your reply. I work in health care a spend 12 hour shifts on my feet. I do have brakes but they seem to disapear in a flash and im right back to work. Yes ive managed to have a chat with my partner. He seems to be going through similar feelings. It makes me feel so much better and we have agreed to be more supportive of eachother. I feel hes actualy listened this time rather than just saying "it will be fine"

I do have brakes they just seem to be over with so soon and im right back to my job again. I hate it. I used to love it and give it 110% every day. Now i get everything done quickly and get out. I cant stand it. Ive applied for other jobs and i have interviews coming up. Im hoping with a new job and progressions ill feel better abd everything will improve. I just pray i can pass these interviews and impress them.

No i havent moved. I bought my house at 19 and moved out of my parent's at 20. Just up the village from them so im not far away. I let my ex boyfried move in with me at the time and it was terrible. Lost 2 maybe 3 jobs. Left a mess. Id come home after a shift exhausted and he had been playing on the pc all day. Jobless lazy and no respect for the house i worked so hard for. He offten left me worrying about bills and money. The partner im with now is nothing like him. But i still get anxiety over chors and the clenliness of my house. Maybe its a trigger?

Since joing this site ive revived lots of advice and people to talk to. I feel so much better. We have a new managed. Me and my collegues hate her. We feel she has no excperience in our field of work and she never stays for a full shift. We have very little respect for her and i don't trust her. She has tried to get some of us sacked. It makes me sad my place of work used to be positive, exciting, wondetful. I used to come home exhausted but feeling of accomplished and a job well done. Ready to do it all over again. Now its the place i feel sick going to. Nervouse someones watching, scared to approach my managed about anything. Ive been there 4 years. Weve had 3 managers, and i think only a handful of sraff from when i first started. The new staff are very nice and some have become my best friends but some you need to watch you back.

Im confident with the support of my boyfriend and a new job my moods will improve. Its been so nice to talk about this with someone. Its a weight off my chest.

Thank you xxx

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