Why what when how

[thrillseeker]

Feeling like I am going CRAZY I know it's been a mad few days but can't seem to get the right words for how I am feeling just low and angry not wanting to face any1 and I have no idea why but what I do want is to be calm and stress free but can't seem to get stress free because I don't think the doctors really know what's up like I can't seem to make a convo go or like been out in public I just want a stress free life nothing standing in the way nothing getting me upset or like I have been pushed to the point where I just snap.

What's the point to all this I just wish I could make my mind up because sometimes I feel like I am walking alone and no one can here me why do I feel like I do like no one cares or no one likes me maybe it's in my head best place for it because if I speak or say something am been hard on my self or am not thinking about other people's feeling because like nothing can go wrong with me or so people say its in your head nothing wrong with you but there is loads wrong I can't think straight my minds going 10 miles an hour an always banging and can't stop or slow it down oh we'll never mind

Hope you all had a fab christmas and all the best for 2015 am going to hide my self away because I feel like an trapped and I don't want to be so hard to break this happit and I can't ignore it any longer bleep bang dash

[CarolineLondon]

Hey Hey, slow down Mr, deep breaths.

Have you ever looked at monks and thought how serene or those wrasskles who find meditation easy, or one of those people who seems calm and together. Well theres a thing called mindfulness and to the best of my knowledge it works like this, it helps you live in the moment. That is not think about the future, the past or anything but the here and now.

So you say, what good is that to me, well right now your brain is running up and down like a train and you are torturing yourself. You need to slllllooooow down, now just bare with me here.

First I care and I am VERY Sorry you arent happy that life isnt everything you want because the truth is you deserve the best. But you cant go from saddness or despair to happiness in one leap, so you do it in stages....sllllooooow stages.

Just hang in with me, so you feel overwhelmed and theres too much noise in your head, too much going on a round you. I hope in your desperation you are willing to try something new, mindfulness quiets your mind, give you a little breathing room.

So heres is how it works, sit in a chair or stand if you like, feeeel your feet on the ground, feel the weight of your body, feel the hard ground, what your shoes feel like. Then listen (maybe you need to go to the bathroom or the garden for this, find an alone place) and listen, find a sound and focus on it, maybe a bird singing or a dripping tap and just listen for a time, each time a thought pops up, push it away and feel your feet again, listen, breath easy.

This wont solve your problems but with practice it will ease your anxiety, give you some peace.

Tell me this if you had just been in a car crash, almost fatally injured maybe even in intensive care, would you expect yourself to do the washing up. Take it easy, be kind to yourself, DO NOTHING, do lots of nothing, rest, listen to music, plays on the radio, read. Youve had a nasty shock a kick of high depression now you need to take it easy, only do stuff as you get stronger.

If you feel bad putting people off maybe tell them your under the weather or have a headache, do what it takes to have some me time and rest. You will get better and when you are better thats the time to work on your life not now.

PLEASE PLEASE be kind to yourself, you are a good and worthy person. Be your own best friend and slowly it will all come right.

The People here are AMAZING and give great advice.

For now I am sorry you feel so very bad and I wish you well and eventual great happiness X

[thrillseeker in reply to CarolineLondon]

Hey funny thing here Caroline

I had been in a bad accident when I was four that should have taken my life am thankful that I am still here I got knocked over at age four and spent 3months in hospital had to learn to walk and talk all over again I still get blured vision in my eyes but I will never drive.

I can't express how bad my days can be sometimes I do those things you said I have been doing them for a while I still feel like am crazy but shh on that one I thank you for your kindness and for what you say thank you so much

[CarolineLondon in reply to thrillseeker]

WOW Im so impressed ...GOOOO Thrillseeker, you went through all that and your still bouncing around, way to go! Im so impressed! Wow no wonder you have bad days, but more power to you that on your good days you keep going, honestly Im sooo impressed!

Thank you so much for sharing X

Really hope you sleep well tonight.

[thrillseeker in reply to CarolineLondon]

Hey Caroline

I wouldn't normally share but I think it's more clear for people to know so that they am not just an upset person or a grumpy sole... i some times can't string a convocation together with people like face to face my mind goes blank and I find it hard talking to people that I don't know because can't manage to get the correct words together ove the Internet is easy because I can manage or delete if don't sound right there had been many a times where I can ramble on and not make no sence what's so ever thank you for you kind kind words and thank you for been there for me I am so thankful for that

Your friend Ian

[Photogeek]

Hi there sorry your feeling like this. I think we can all feel alone and misunderstood

When we are Depressed. Have you got any help so far for your Depression?

Medication or Talking therapy of any kind.

Hannah

[thrillseeker in reply to Photogeek]

Thank you

I am taking sertraline 150mg and amitriptyline 25mg I just feel empty and worthless like there is nothing to live for

I am pain free thanks to the amitriptyline but feel like an empty and worthless I know it's me I tell my self this I am trying to change myself but it's not easy but how can i still feel like this if I have been taking the medication well sertraline for over 9 years I shouldn't feel like this but I do and it's not easy to ignore any more thank you for your kind words

Hannah many thanks Ian

[Photogeek]

Hi Ian

I understand how you feel. I am on antidepressants too for years and I

Find its a constant battle with Depression.

Being here helps me as we all help each other out and we know then

That others feel like that too. So Ian stick around and give yourself a

Chance to get to know us.

Hannah

[thrillseeker in reply to Photogeek]

Thank you Hannah

I shall stick around I will respond more or try to i some times say the wrong things and people can get upset and angry at me I am not wanting to upset any1 wanting to help my self as well as helping others through there hard times to

Thanks again Hannah

Ian

[Catmag]

Hi Ian,

Caroline & Hannah are right, you need to be kind to yourself, you also need to be mindful. This may sound silly, but have you discussed your anxiety with your GP?

I ask because I am on Sertraline (only 2 years now) but recently it was increased to 150mg and it made me hyper. So my GP reduced it back to the 100 mg dose, that has made me feel much better.

I understand your feeling worthless, I feel that way, but everyone around sees me as capable, so I rely on professionals for the help I need. But I also find this site to be very helpful and comforting. People here know how you feel without to much explanation. So if you just burt out how you feel no-one will judge that.

Hope you feel better soon, take care, Catherine.

[thrillseeker in reply to Catmag]

Hi Catherine

I have explained all to gp I see one gp so it is easier to explain an not having to back track or starting all over again he has looked at my medical notes and seen from them that I was in a bad way when I was younger he is relating all of this to the TBI that I suffered when I was four years old out bursts can be short and painless but other people are miss understanding and tend to judge me making it harder for me to get on how ever I have kids partner love them to bits but can't help other people saying stuff about me or my family and that really gets under my skin.... Try this or think how it is for a TBI suffer to think its not easy I am the same as every one else that walks breaths and eats.... But to be painted a thug or a person that wants to make other people's life hard when I have no intention of doing its some what hard to be the good guy I find that I am the one that's lossing it and flipping out because the woman an her husband made my life so unhappy at this point intime they went around telling the estate I abuse my family and shout a lot had council out and so on but to have police knock you out of bed @ 330 in a morning then that's just wrong saying there was shouting coming from your house...... Erm what the bleep I was in bed sleeping housing come out and say this is not on what she is doing but wait I report her for ridding my kids in summer time and they say I am not telling the truth when it was some friends over the road from me that pointed this out to me and nothing is done about this I am expected to be polite in witch I have done for the past 3 years of living in this house I am not having people like this saying I am this that and other it started off as I am gay then slowly started to me touching stuff and word got about an if I didn't set them straight I would be six feet under how ever all te best for 2015 and have a good day

Thanks for taking the time to reply enjoy your day from Ian

Happy new year to Caroline & Hannah too thank you for your support best thing you guys have given me thank you so much