I'm Either a Rock or a Wreck

The countdown to my move is one week, three days. I bounce back & forth between excitement for a new journey and deep sadness because I don't want to end this relationship. My bf has been very good the last week or so. He's back to his calm, loving phase, the one I fell in love with. I am so glad for the peace and I am showing him as much love as I can. I know it won't last. Last night he told me he has a special account where he's saving for a trip to Hawaii. We often talked about how niether of us really wanted to get married again (we both did it 2x already), but we'd love to take a honeymoon. I stuck to my guns. I didn't say a word about the trip or moving. I did tell myself that it doesn't change anything and, God Almighty, what if we're in Hawaii & he slips into his manic mode! So, as I'm standing my ground s ilently, he adds, "or maybe I'll payoff my Harley with it." My psyche breathed a heavy sigh. It was a typical thought from him. He means well, for about 5 seconds at a time. So, I'm back to sweating over the move. I still need to pack a ton. I hope I can pull this off. If I can, when I get settled in the new place, I'll invite you all to a virtual party. Like at Christmas, it will be come as you are and I shall accomodate each if you in any special way you need.

I love you all. Thank you for your support.

7 Replies

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  • WhiteAlice , you have the strength and support of everyone here, we're right behind you.

    Chloe

  • Thank you!

  • Good luck and stay strong and make a new life for yourself, unfortunately it's only when people see they are losing their partner that they begin to mend their ways. Some people unfortunately don't change so you have to take charge of your life, life is far too short to be unhappy.

    I'm getting out my gladrags for your virtual party. My prayers are with you as I know what's this is like . I never regret my moving on, not easy but much better in the long run.

    Hannah

  • Thank you, Hannah!

  • Well done you for not believing a word and staying focussed on getting away from this mainly toxic relationship. You won't regret it. x

  • Well done in standing your ground, he won't change. All the best for the move and I'll be their in my glad rags lol x

  • Loving it for you .. You deserve so much more than living with him, the way he is is rank .. Oh my, you will soon feel less pressure once the move is made. Give yourself time to settle as it is an upheaval as you are aware .. I shall look forward to the party woooohoooo :)

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